Wishful Thinking Read online

  She breathed a sigh of relief when the break room was free. If only everyone would just stay away from her she might get through the rest of the day. She was fixing herself a cup of hot tea and planning how to handle her performance review later that afternoon, when she heard someone behind her.

  Phil turned apprehensively, but to her relief it was only Davis Miles, the handsome lawyer that Alison was always hitting on. Thank goodness she had never had any desire to tell him off. She was safe.

  “Morning, Mister Miles,” she said, adding some sweetener to her hot cinnamon tea and keeping her head down.

  “Good morning, Ms. Swann.” He nodded gravely at her, showing the restraint she found so admirable in him. Phil watched him from the corner of her eye as he poured himself a mug of coffee. With his dark hair and eyes, she had always thought he looked like the hero on the cover of a romance novel. To her horror, her mouth opened suddenly and the thought came rolling off her tongue.

  “You know, Mister Miles, with your dark good looks, I’ve always thought you looked like one of those handsome, well-hung hunks from the cover of a bodice ripper romance novel,” Phil heard herself say. Oh God! Did she have to say it quite like that? She watched as Davis Miles turned around, a small frown creasing his perfect forehead.

  “Uh, thank you, Ms. Swann,” he said carefully.

  “I’ve always wanted to see you with your shirt off,” Phil continued, much to her own horror and, most likely, to Miles’, as well. “You look like you work out. I’ve always kind of wondered what you look like naked.”

  Oh no! She slapped a hand over her mouth. Fighting with her fiancé and shouting at the pencil boy was nothing compared to this—nothing at all. Phil wanted to sink through the floor.

  “I’m sorry…” Davis Miles was staring at her, his coffee mug halfway to his lips. “Did…did you just say you wanted to see me naked? I mean, that’s what I thought you said but…”

  “I did say that, but I didn’t mean it,” Phil gabbled. “I mean, I did mean it or I wouldn’t have said it but I didn’t mean to say it. I’m so sorry,” she finished miserably, “I can’t help it—I can’t stop saying what I think.”

  Miles was still giving her a strange look. “Did, uh, did Alison put you up to this? Because this whole, um, this whole naked thing sounds like something she would say.”

  “What whole naked thing?”

  Phil tried to stifle a groan as she turned to see her slinky coworker sliding up behind her. An old saying of her nana’s popped into her head—speak of the devil and he will appear. Or in this case, she. She couldn’t help wondering how much of the humiliating exchange Alison had heard.

  “Nothing, Alison,” she said hastily. “Nothing at all.”

  “Oh, I think there’s something going on in here, Philomena,” Alison purred. Today she was wearing a low-cut poison green blouse that matched her eyes perfectly and her skirt, as always, was positively indecent. “I heard my name and the word ‘naked’ in the same breath,” she continued, batting her lashes at Davis Miles. “I hope you’re not giving Davis here a bad impression of me.”

  “Why would I bother when you’re doing such a good job of it yourself?” Phil said. The wish was in full command of her now. She couldn’t even stop her mouth long enough to try and think of a nursery rhyme to distract her awful thoughts.

  Alison stopped making eyes at Miles and turned, giving her full attention to Phil for the first time. “What did you say?”

  “I said,” Phil continued, unable to stop herself, “That you dress like a slut. And you act like one too.” Oh, God! This is getting worse and worse!

  Alison put a hand on her hip, her green eyes flashing. “Are you calling me a slut?”

  Phil shrugged. “If the size seven fuck-me pump fits—wear it, hon.” Behind her, Davis Miles snorted laughter, which he quickly turned into a cough.

  Alison’s eyes narrowed. “How dare you talk to me like that, you drab little bitch?”

  Phil stood up straighter and stared her coworker in the eye. “I’m only saying what everyone else in the office is thinking. Why don’t you have some respect for yourself, Alison? There’s more to you than just your tits and ass—at least I hope there is. So why don’t you act like it? Button your blouse, pull down your skirt and try doing some work for a change, instead of sleeping your way to the middle.”

  “Well, I…I…” Alison stuttered.

  “And another thing,” Phil snapped, pointing a finger at her coworker’s considerable cleavage. “You car is parked in my spot for the twentieth time this month. If it happens again, I can’t be responsible for my actions.”

  “Are…are you threatening me?” Alison put a hand to her heaving bosom, her narrow, fox-like face flushed with anger.

  “No,” Phil said coolly. “Just your car. Good morning.” She brushed past Alison and Davis, her mug of tea clutched in her hand and her heart thumping in her ears. So much for avoiding everyone and not having any more confrontations.

  “Philomena, I want to talk to you.”

  Not Kelli again! She must have been lying in wait for Phil outside the break room.

  “Now is really not a good time,” Phil said truthfully, quickening her step. “Honestly, Kelli, I really need some alone time right now.”

  “Well I want to talk about the way you bit my head off earlier.” Kelli’s strident voice was no doubt reaching everyone in the office.

  Phil turned abruptly, slopping hot tea over her hand and onto the maroon rug. Carefully, she placed the mug on a nearby desk and crossed her arms over her chest. “All right,” she said grimly. “Let’s talk. But I warn you, you might not like what you hear.”

  “I…” Kelli looked nonplussed. “Well, I just wanted to say you didn’t have to yell at me like that. I was just coming up to tell you how late you were this morning. In fact,” She brightened as she spoke. “You know, I was late the other day, but I had a totally good excuse. See, I was stuck in traffic because there was this major accident. And I was all thinking, ‘God, Kelli, why does this kind of stuff always happen to you?’ So the woman next to me in traffic, she was like eating some hash browns or something—I don’t know. Anyway, she was all staring at me, like I had the plague or something. So I roll down my window and I go, ‘Do I know you?’ And she goes—”

  “Enough!” Phil had her hands clenched so tightly she could feel her nails biting into her palms, but it was no use.

  “What?” Kelli looked at her in confusion.

  “Every day.” Phil raised a finger, advancing on her coworker. “Every day I come in here and I have to hear about your life. It might be different if you ever asked about my day or wanted to talk about anyone else but yourself. But no, Kelli, it’s always you, you, you. Did it ever once occur to you that I don’t want to hear every tiny little detail of your existence? Have you stopped once to consider the fact that you just might not be the center of the universe as we know it?”

  “I…I…” Finally Kelli was at a loss for words. But Phil wasn’t.

  “Kelli,” she said, staring her mouthy coworker in the face. “I’ve been wanting to say this for years. Shut. Up.” She turned and stalked away from her cubicle, leaving Kelli in silence for the first time since they had started working together.

  This wish was appalling and exhilarating at the same time. But Phil knew there were sure to be repercussions. Big ones. At the same time she couldn’t regret telling her coworker off. Was she turning into a bad person? Or was she finally standing up for herself? Or both?

  Still, Phil realized she had an even bigger problem. The wish she had made was no longer distinguishing between things she actually wanted to say, down in the dark depths of her subconscious, and things she was simply thinking about and had no desire to voice out loud. Everything that popped into her mind came straight out her mouth. She was literally speaking her mind.

  There was only one thing to do—she had to get her fairy godmother to reverse this wish.

  Chapter Tw