Lily Alone Read online

  ‘Do I look OK?’ she asked.

  ‘You bet,’ I said.

  ‘You look lovely, Mum,’ said Bliss.

  ‘Lovely, lovely, lovely,’ Pixie said, clapping her hands.

  Baxter tried to give Mum a wolf whistle, but he couldn’t whistle properly because he’d lost his front teeth, so it came out as a funny hissing sound that made us all laugh.

  Mum gave us all a kiss goodbye, and she was off.

  To tell you the truth, I thought she’d be back early. I was pretty sure this Gordon wouldn’t turn up. I thought Mum would wait up in town a while, maybe have a drink to cheer herself up, and then come back home once she knew the kids would be in bed. I’d make her a cup of tea and give her a cuddle, and if she cried I’d wipe her eyes and tell her he wasn’t worth it. I’d act all grown up, like I really was Mum’s mate. I was almost looking forward to it.

  But Mum didn’t come back. We watched telly and then we played a long, boring game of snap. It got especially tedious because Baxter wanted to change the rules and shout a rude word beginning with S whenever two cards were the same – and then Pixie kept shouting it too, and we couldn’t shut her up. It was hard work getting them calmed down and into bed. Pixie was still sleepily mumbling the rude word when I tucked her up in her cot.

  I had to chase Baxter all round the flat before I caught him and hurled him on top of the mattress, and then I had to lie on top of him to keep him there before he calmed down at last and went to sleep clutching his new fork-lift truck. Bliss went to bed without making a fuss, but when I looked into our bedroom half an hour later she was still wide awake. I let her get up again and come in the living room with me.

  ‘Come and cuddle up on the sofa, Bliss. I’ll tell you a story if you like,’ I said.

  She nuzzled up to me obediently, tucking her head neatly under my shoulder. She was always lovely to sit with. Baxter was a nightmare, wrestling and kicking all over the place, and Pixie had become a hopeless fidget too, unable to sit still for two seconds.

  ‘You are my absolute favourite, Bliss,’ I said, putting my arm round her. ‘OK, shall I read a story from our book? Cinderella? For the nine hundred and ninety-ninth time.’

  ‘Could you tell me a story out of your head?’ Bliss coaxed. ‘A fairy story, but without any witches or giants or dragons.’

  ‘OK then, I’ll tell you a story about . . .’

  ‘About a little girl called Bliss?’

  ‘And a big girl called Lily,’ I said.

  ‘And Baxter? And Pixie?’ said Bliss.

  ‘Well, they’re in our story, but they’re fast asleep in an enchanted forest.’

  ‘There won’t be any witches, will there?’

  ‘No, absolutely no warty old witches. We’re fairies anyway, you and me, Bliss, and our magic is much stronger than any old witches.’

  ‘Are Baxter and Pixie fairies too?’

  ‘Of course they are. Baxter wears a special pink sequin fairy dress with matching sparkly pink wings.’

  Bliss snorted with laughter, as if I’d told the funniest joke ever.

  ‘And Pixie wears a little white fairy frock, with weeny white wings, only she’s hopeless, she’s forever crawling around the grass and trying to climb trees in the enchanted forest, so she’s always all over grime and grass stains. She’s only a baby fairy so she can’t fly properly yet. And Baxter doesn’t fly properly – he swoops round and round the tree trunks, throwing acorns at squirrels and trying to catch all the birds. But we fly wonderfully, Bliss.’

  ‘What colour dresses have we got?’

  ‘Well, you have a blue fairy frock.’

  ‘Blue’s my favourite colour,’ said Bliss happily.

  ‘Yes, it’s a very pretty sky-blue colour, and you have the most beautiful rainbow wings. You’re the prettiest fairy I’ve ever seen.’

  Bliss pulled the thin wisps of her hair.

  ‘Do I have long golden curls?’ she asked.

  ‘Absolutely, way down to your waist, and I brush them every morning and tie rainbow-coloured ribbons in your hair to match your wings.’

  ‘What about you, Lily? Do you have a blue dress too?’

  I nibble a little piece of skin on my lip, deliberating.

  ‘I don’t mind you having blue, Lily. Tell you what, you could wear blue because we’re twins, see, you and me,’ Bliss suggested.

  ‘No, no, I’m the big sister fairy. I have to keep you in order.’

  ‘But I’m always good.’

  ‘You’re good here, but you might be a very naughty little fairy in the enchanted forest. You might pull the heads off all the flowers and chase the rabbits and eat all the wild strawberries instead of sharing them with us.’

  ‘So I’ll be like Baxter?’

  ‘Worse than Baxter. And when you do something really outrageous, like tearing your blue dress and running around in your fairy knickers singing rude songs at the top of your voice, I shall have to catch you and spank you with my fairy wand.’

  Bliss was rolling around on the sofa, giggling.

  ‘So what colour is your fairy dress?’ she spluttered.

  ‘I think it’s purple. Yeah, purple like those pansy flowers. I’ll have a very fine soft purply bodice and then a sticking-out paler purple skirt, lots and lots of layers, so it swooshes around me as I fly. My wings are pale purple too but they shade to dark at their feathery tips, and I have tiny, tiny purple pansies in my hair.

  ‘Oh, how lovely! Can I have purple too, please, please?’

  ‘No, your blue is much prettier, and purple wouldn’t go with your rainbow wings. You have to be co-ordinated, Bliss.’

  ‘What does that mean?’

  ‘All your colours have to go together. Baxter is a beautifully co-ordinated fairy – he’s got little dark pink underpants that go with his fairy frock and he wears shiny pink lipstick to match.’

  Bliss was snorting with laughter now, her own face bright pink too.

  ‘You’re so funny, Lily!’ she said. ‘You will always be my sister, won’t you? I mean, really. You won’t go off anywhere?’

  ‘I’ll always be your big sister, Bliss, and I’ll always look after you, I promise,’ I said.

  ‘Mum is coming back, isn’t she?’ said Bliss.

  ‘Of course she is. You snuggle down and go to sleep with me on the sofa, and when you wake up again I bet Mum will be here and she’ll be telling us off because we’re not in bed.’

  Bliss snuggled down obediently and went to sleep. We woke with a start at dawn, as Mum crept through the front door. She found us on the sofa and kissed us both.

  ‘What are you funny girls doing in here on the sofa? Have you been watching telly half the night? You’re very naughty girls.’

  ‘Oh, Mum, Lily said you’d tell us off and you are!’ Bliss said delightedly.

  ‘What? You want to be told off, you daft ha’p’orth?’ said Mum, tickling her.

  ‘No tickles, no tickles!’ Bliss begged.

  ‘Well, you go and get into bed with Baxter and have another little snooze, there’s a good girl.’

  ‘I’m not a good girl, I’m a bad fairy,’ Bliss said, but she trotted off to the living-room door. Then she turned back. ‘Aren’t you coming too, Lily?’

  ‘Lily and I are going to have a special big girls’ chat together,’ said Mum. ‘Off you go now – or I’ll tickle you till you squeal.’

  ‘I’m going, I’m going,’ said Bliss, disappearing.

  ‘Ah!’ Mum said, yawning and stretching. ‘She’s a funny little thing, isn’t she? Here, Lily, go and make us a cup of tea. You and me need to talk.’

  I went to put the kettle on. Gordon had obviously turned up after all. Mum was in such a good mood. She looked good too, even though her make-up was all gone and her hair tucked back behind her ears. She looked like a girl again, not a mum of four. I felt so happy for her. Well, most of me did. Another deep-down, meaner part of me was jealous. Why couldn’t I ever make her happy like that? Why weren’t the