The Space Between Us Read online

  “Later,” I told him, and hung up.

  Chapter 6

  I fucked the Murphy brothers for about a month and a half before I discovered something important. I loved having two cocks to suck and stroke, one in my pussy and one in my mouth—though never up the ass. They didn’t ask, and I surely didn’t offer. I’m not certain any of us thought such a thing existed outside of porn movies, anyway, and we were so gorged full on everything else we were doing that adding that forbidden thing didn’t even seem necessary.

  More than just the physical aspects, the bonus of two sets of hands and tongues, I discovered I enjoyed the attention of two. If one boyfriend was good, two would be better, right? Except it wasn’t like the three of us could go sashaying down the halls in school, all of us holding hands or making out at our lockers the way everyone else did.

  “Pick one,” Chase said. He was in an old recliner in their parents’ basement, feet flat on the floor, his hands on either side of my head, his dick in my mouth.

  I gave his cock another long suck before taking it in my hand and sitting back on my heels to look up at him. His brother was sprawled on the sofa next to us, idly stroking his own boner. “What do you mean, pick one?”

  Chase, typical boy, put his hand over mine to rub his dick across my mouth, but I pulled away just enough that it couldn’t reach my lips. “Pick one of us, Tesla,” he repeated.

  I laughed, thinking he was joking. “For what?”

  “You know,” Chance said.

  I looked back and forth at them. I’d never be able to see the twins as anything but two separate people ever again, and yet I couldn’t imagine them as anything but part of a unit. “I don’t want to pick just one.”

  “She wants us both. I told you,” Chance said.

  His brother shifted, his young, thick cock not wilting even the slightest bit. “You have to, Tesla.”

  “Why?”

  Chase was the firstborn brother. Nobody had told me; I could just tell. If there were decisions to be made, he was generally the first to make them. Chance was more likely to wait and see what happened. Now Chase tangled his fingers in my hair, and I tensed, thinking he meant to pull my face forward again.

  “You don’t have to stop fucking us both,” he said. “Just pick one of us for public.”

  “Oh.” I stroked his dick, twisting my palm around the head in the way that made him shudder. “That.”

  The truth was, I didn’t really feel the need to go public. I already had the advantage of being a little exotic. I wasn’t the only girl who wore Docs or dyed her hair colors that were deemed “distracting” by the school. I wasn’t the only one with piercings or what seemed like a permanent weekly appointment with the guidance counselor. I was just different because none of them had known me their whole lives. Or because I didn’t seem to need their approval.

  “Who says I want to go public?” I leaned forward to lick him, then took him in my mouth again. I closed my eyes to concentrate on the sensation of all that hot, hard flesh on my tongue.

  Chance made a low noise, though it was his brother’s knob in my mouth. I slitted open my eyes to look at him, smiling around Chase’s dick as I sucked and stroked. I didn’t want to make him come like this. I wanted to fuck him first. I wanted to fuck both of them. I wanted them both sweating and groaning, working inside and against me. I wanted the spiraling crescendo of orgasm to rip through me. Basically, I wanted to get in, get on, get off, get up, get dressed and get out.

  Even at the time, I was pretty sure that wasn’t the way the rest of my schoolmates operated. They were concerned about being seen together, all the accoutrements of “going out,” like class rings or hickeys. Things that marked them as belonging to someone. The thought of belonging to any one person was not only foreign to me, but more than slightly distasteful. When I thought about picking one of those Murphy boys to parade around with in front of everyone to somehow legitimize this, what we did here in the basement in secret…well, my lip curled as if I’d put my hand in something rotten.

  Whatever conversation those brothers had intended to have with me, and I had no doubt they’d discussed it at length beforehand, I was able to get them to forget about it. Especially when I reached to take Chance’s dick in my fist while I sucked his brother, and when I dipped my head down low to mouth Chase’s balls.

  When I lifted up the pleated plaid skirt I’d bought from the Catholic thrift store, someone’s leftover school uniform, to reveal I’d already slipped off my panties and wore only a pair of knee-high socks, it was a good guarantee both those boys would lose their powers of speech. And I didn’t need them to talk. I urged Chance to move behind me. I was on the pill, but I made them use rubbers anyway, not because I thought either of them were screwing around with anyone else, but because there was less mess to clean up after if they shot into a condom.

  They hadn’t known a lot about female anatomy when we first started, but now Chance knew just where to slide his fingers, right along my already rigid clit. He filled me a little too fast, bumping me forward against his brother’s lap. Chase’s cock went down my throat too far and would’ve choked me if I hadn’t held him so firmly by the base—but by now I’d learned to anticipate Chance’s clumsiness. I liked it, actually, how eager he was to get inside me. How his hands gripped my hips hard enough to bruise, sometimes, those faint blue marks on my skin a better reminder to me of what we’d been doing than any suck mark on my neck or collarbone could’ve been.

  Chance fucked into me from behind. I sucked Chase’s dick and rubbed his balls. It was all good and getting better. Faster, harder, in and out, my pussy slick and tight. Full.

  I came before both of them. I think they never understood how easy it was for me; how it wasn’t their skill that got me off. Chance came next, and that was also usually the way it happened. With his brother still inside me, I peered up at Chase. He was looking down. I pressed my finger against his asshole and he exploded into my mouth with a hoarse shout that made me smile because it sounded…just a little…like my name.

  “If you had to pick one,” Chance said after I’d used the tiny bathroom and come out with my face washed, mouth rinsed, hair brushed, panties replaced, “which one of us would you choose?”

  Chase had already gone upstairs. Chance was the one who would wait and walk me to my car, the beat-up piece of junk that I still drove now, nine years later. Chance was the one who put his hand on the driver’s side door so I couldn’t open it, who peered down at me with a solemn look. Chance was the one who really wanted to know.

  “I can’t choose,” I told him, even though I knew it was a lie. “I’m into both of you.”

  “Yeah, but…”

  I stood on my tiptoes to kiss him, thinking, as he probably wasn’t, that his brother’s taste still lingered on my tongue despite the rinsing. “Not into the boyfriend scene, okay? It’s all cool. Right?”

  He nodded. What else could he do? He was getting regular, slightly freaky sex. Was he going to turn that down just so we could hold hands and go to football games together? Maybe homecoming, and later, the prom?

  “Not my thing,” I told him, and meant it.

  He didn’t move his hand even when I gave it a pointed glance. “Why not?”

  I didn’t have an answer for that. I couldn’t explain to that nice boy whose mother was still way too attached to him all my reasons for not wanting what every other girl I knew seemed to want. So I didn’t give him an answer. I kissed him again, and when I pulled away he put his hands on my hips to hold me closer to him.

  Later, I would break that boy’s heart and not care, because my own would have already been shattered. But we didn’t know that then. At that moment, we were sneaking kisses in the turning-cold fall air.

  I thought about them now as I pulled into the parking lot of Capriotti’s Auto Sales and found a space for my car. I got out, still thinking about it. I was looking for Cap, but found Vic instead.

  “Hey. What’re you still