Four Children and It Read online

  ‘Smash! Stop it! You’ll kill him!’ I shouted. ‘And don’t get glass all over the floor – Maudie’s got bare feet!’

  ‘He tried to kill me!’ said Smash, outraged. ‘I was just having a peep at him, tapping away on his laptop on his lounger, and then he looked up and saw me and I practically wet myself, the expression on his face was so funny – but then he took aim and chucked his wretched laptop at me. Look, I’m still bleeding!’ Smash pointed to her forehead. ‘I was so stunned – literally – that I just sort of flopped forward and he grabbed hold of me, and pulled me in here, and tied me up with his horrible dressing gown and then you’ll never ever guess what he did, the total creep.’

  ‘What? What did he do?’

  ‘He went and phoned a newspaper! He’s selling me for thousands of pounds!’ Smash shouted, aiming the vase again.

  ‘No! Don’t! That’s a Lalique vase, for God’s sake. Listen, I don’t want to harm you – any of you. I can’t believe this! What the hell are you, some kind of aliens? I just want to keep you safe. You’re mine, I saw you first.’

  ‘Of course we’re not yours, you stupid man!’ I said, rushing to Smash and trying to undo the dressing-gown cord.

  ‘Leave her! You’re staying, all of you. You’re my story!’ said the man. He seized hold of me and tried to push me to the ground.

  ‘Don’t you dare touch my sister!’ Robbie shouted, and he punched the man in the chest. He was trying to be fierce, but his fist was small and made no impression at all.

  ‘Hit him where it hurts!’ Smash yelled.

  I tried to scratch the man’s face but he grabbed hold of my hand, bending all the fingers back, making me scream. Robbie twisted round and kicked him hard between the legs. I don’t know if he was deliberately aiming there or whether it was sheer luck, but the man doubled up, making a weird Ooomph noise.

  ‘Quick, quick!’ I said, struggling with the cord again. ‘Let’s all get out of here.’

  I gave one last frantic tug and then the knot loosened. Smash jumped up, gave the man another kick herself, and grabbed Maudie. Robbie and I clutched hands and then we all ran out of the room, back on to the balcony.

  ‘Noooo!’ the man wailed behind us.

  ‘Yes!’ we shouted, and then we stepped up into the air, spread our wings and flew away.

  We flew back along the river. Even Smash had lost her taste for further adventures now. Her wings had lost a lot of feathers in her struggle with the horrible man, and some were crumpled and sticking out at painful angles. Maudie was tired now, so we had to take turns carrying her again. My fingers were hurting a lot and I still felt sick with shock. Robbie was the only one of us who had suddenly got his second wind.

  ‘Did you see the way I kicked the man, wham, bash, bonk? He just dropped like a stone. I overpowered him totally, didn’t I, even though he was much bigger than me. I saved you, Ros, and you, Smash, and Maudie too. I saved you all!’

  I let him exaggerate for a while, but by the time we were halfway home we were all heartily sick of his boasting. And then it started to rain. We discovered that you get much wetter up in the air than you do down on the ground. It’s bad enough being soaked to the skin, but it’s far worse having sopping-wet feathers. Because our wings weighed so much more now, our heads hung down and our shoulders hunched, and it was a terrible effort to fly on doggedly. It was so dark because of the rain that it was difficult to gauge time. I didn’t think it could possibly be near sunset, but I started to worry all the same. What if our wings suddenly disappeared when we were here in mid-air? Would we plummet downwards?

  We tried flying very low, just in case, but this wasn’t practical. People kept looking up and spotting us and screaming.

  It was easier when we’d passed all the built-up areas and were flying over woods. Very few people were walking there in the pouring rain. There were so many woods and commons and wild patches of land. I started to wonder if we’d manage to find our own Oxshott woods ever again. But Smash seemed to have her own inner satellite navigation system hard-wired into her head. She led us back, back, back, until we suddenly saw the yellow of our sandpit underneath us.

  ‘There!’ she said, and we flew down and landed in a tangled heap in the sand. All our beautiful wings were crumpled now, hanging like damp curtains from our backs, moulting feathers as we moved.

  Dad and Alice saw us and waved vaguely and dreamily, but seemingly couldn’t see our wings. It was still pouring with rain, but they sat together under the trees, their hair plastered to their heads, rain running down their noses and dripping on to their chins. Smash stood up wearily, spread her tattered wings, and flew right over to Alice, circling her several times. Alice didn’t even blink.

  Smash flew back and squatted in the sandpit with us.

  ‘It’s like she couldn’t even see me,’ she mumbled.

  ‘Yes, she’s in a kind of trance. It’s the Psammead magic – you know that,’ I said.

  ‘She’s like that even when she’s not in a trance. Except when she’s nagging at me. And so is my dad. It’s like he’s in a trance all the time now he’s met this flipping girl. One measly sentence of email, that’s all I get. It must have taken him a minute at the most.’

  ‘Oh, stop it. Cheer up. Look, we’ve had the most simply amazing day, flying around, all because of your special wish,’ I said.

  ‘Yeah, but I’m getting a bit sick of it now. Let’s wake the sleeping beauties and go home,’ said Smash.

  ‘We’ll have to wait till the wings fall off,’ said Robbie. ‘I know they can’t see them, but everyone else can. They’ll try to catch us and sell us to the papers, just like that horrible man in the flats.’

  ‘Well, surely it’s way past sunset by now. It’s raining so hard you can’t see any sun. Hey, Mr Psammead!’ She flopped down with her chin in the sand. ‘Are you there? It’s me, Smash, the shouty one. I’m soaking wet and I’ve been bonked on the head and I haven’t had any tea at all. I want to go home. Can’t you make an exception just once and pop out and grant us one more teeny-weeny wish. We just want our wretched wings to fall off.’

  ‘You’re not ever going to get it to come out now, not when it’s pouring with rain. The Psammead hates water. He’ll have burrowed way, way down to get away from it,’ I told her.

  ‘He’ll be giving an Australian boy a wish now,’ said Robbie. ‘Hey, that’s an idea! Maybe we can all wish to go to Australia tomorrow. I’d simply love to see some kangaroos and koala bears.’

  ‘I think they’re just in special zoos and play-parks now,’ I said. ‘And it’s my wish next. I’m going to try to make it special for all of us, seeing as it’s our last wish. Only I don’t quite know what it’ll be yet. Flying will be hard to beat,’ I added politely, for Smash’s benefit.

  ‘I’m fed up with flying,’ she said. ‘Here, Rosalind, give my wings a real tug. Maybe we can just pull them off.’

  I tried pulling them as hard as I could. Smash yelled in pain.

  ‘I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you,’ I said.

  ‘No, it’s okay. Try harder,’ she said.

  It was no use. The wings seemed as much part of her as her arms and legs.

  ‘Perhaps we’re stuck with them forever now,’ Smash said gloomily, opening and shutting her wings, spraying the rest of us with raindrops. ‘How will we ever get clothes that fit over them? And it’s going to be a real struggle getting through doors, and we’re never going to fit into bed properly. We’ll never be able to go out without causing a riot – though that might be quite good fun.’

  ‘You didn’t look as if you were having fun tied up to that table. Good job I came along and rescued you,’ said Robbie. ‘Did you see the way I hit that man and I punched him and I kicked him – kerpow, bash, bang!’

  ‘Shut up, Robbie. You’ve told us too many times already,’ I said.

  It didn’t stop him telling us again, so Smash and I rolled him in the sand to stop him. We started fighting in a silly, giggling, sog