The Complete Mackenzie Collection Read online

  He’d been shot before; he’d been sliced up in a knife fight. He’d had his collarbone broken, ribs cracked, a lung punctured. He had been seriously injured before, but this was the closest he’d ever come to dying. He’d been bleeding to death, lying there in the bottom of the raft with Barrie crouched over him, pressing the chador over the wound with every ounce of her weight. Her quickness, her determination, had made the difference. Santos squeezing the plasma from the bags into his veins had made the difference. He had been so close that he could pick out a dozen details that had made the difference; if any one of them hadn’t happened, he would have died.

  He’d been unusually quiet since leaving the naval hospital and returning home for convalescence. It wasn’t that he was in low spirits, but rather that he had a lot of thinking to do, something that hadn’t been easy when practically the entire family had felt compelled to visit and reassure themselves of his relative well-being. Joe had flown in from Washington for a quick check on his baby brother; Michael and Shea had visited several times, bringing their two rapscallion sons with them; Josh and Loren and their three had descended for a weekend visit, which was all the time Loren’s job at the hospital in Seattle had allowed. Maris had driven all night to be there when he was brought home. At least he’d been able to walk on his own by then, even if very slowly, or likely she would still be here. She had pulled up a chair directly in front of him and sat for hours, her black eyes locked on his face as if she was willing vitality from her body into his. Maybe she had been. His little sister was fey, magical; she operated on a different level than other people did.

  Hell, even Chance had shown up. He’d done so warily, eyeing their mother and sister as if they were bombs that might go off in his face, but he was here, sitting beside Zane on the porch.

  “You’re thinking of resigning.”

  Zane didn’t have to wonder how Chance had known what was on his mind. After nearly battering each other to death when they were fourteen, they had reached an unusual communion. Maybe it was because they’d shared so much, from classes to girls to military training. Even after all this time, Chance was as wary as a wounded wolf and didn’t like people to get close to him, but even though he resisted, he was helpless against family. Chance had never in his life been loved until Mary had brought him home with her and the sprawling, brawling Mackenzies had knocked him flat. It was fun to watch him still struggle against the family intimacy each time he was drawn into the circle, because within an hour he always surrendered. Mary wouldn’t let him do anything else; nor would Maris. After accepting him as a brother, Zane had never even acknowledged Chance’s wariness. Only Wolf was willing to give his adopted son time to adjust—but there was still a limit on how much time he would allow.

  “Yeah,” he finally said.

  “Because you nearly bought it this time?”

  Zane snorted. “When has that ever made any difference to either of us?” He alone of the family knew the exact details of Chance’s work. It was a toss-up which of them was in the most danger.

  “Then it’s this last promotion that did it.”

  “It took me out of the field,” Zane said quietly. Carefully he leaned back in the chair and propped his booted feet on the porch railing. Though he was a fast healer, two and a half weeks wasn’t quite long enough to let him ignore the wound. “If two of my men hadn’t been wounded in that screw up on the Montgomery, I wouldn’t have been able to go on this last mission.”

  Chance knew about the screw up. Zane had told him about it, and screw up was the most polite description he’d used. As soon as he’d regained consciousness in the naval hospital, he’d been on the phone, starting and directing the investigation. Though Odessa would fully recover, it was likely Higgins would have to retire on disability. The guards who had shot the two SEALs might escape court-martial if their counsel was really slick, but at the very least they would be cashiered out of the service. The extent of the damage to the careers of Captain Udaka and Executive Officer Boyd remained to be seen; Zane had targeted the shooters, but the ripple effect would go all the way up to the captain.

  “I’m thirty-one,” Zane said. “That’s just about the upper limit for active missions. I’m too damn good at my job, too. The Navy keeps promoting me for it, then they say I’m too highly ranked to go on missions.”

  “You want to throw in with me?” Chance asked casually.

  He’d considered it. Very seriously. But something kept nagging at him, something he couldn’t quite bring into focus.

  “I want to. If things were different, I would, but…”

  “What things?”

  Zane shrugged. At least part of his uneasy feeling could be nailed down. “A woman,” he said.

  “Oh, hell.” Chance kicked back and surveyed the world over the toes of his boots. “If it’s a woman, you won’t be able to concentrate on anything until you’ve gotten her out of your system. Damn their sweet little hides,” he said fondly. Chance generally had women crawling all over him. It didn’t hurt that he was drop-dead handsome, but he had a raffish, daredevil quality to him that brought them out of the woodwork.

  Zane wasn’t certain he could get Barrie out of his system. He wasn’t certain he wanted to. He didn’t wonder why she had disappeared without even saying goodbye, hope you’re feeling better. Bunny and Spook had told him how she’d been dragged, kicking and yelling and swearing, aboard a plane and taken back to Athens. He figured her father, combined with the Navy’s policy of secrecy concerning the SEALs, had prevented her from finding out to which hospital they’d taken him.

  He missed her. He missed her courage, her sturdy willingness to do whatever needed doing. He missed the serenity of her expression, and the heat of her lovemaking.

  God, yes.

  The one memory, more than any of the others, that was branded in his brain was the moment when she had reached for his belt and said in that fierce whisper, “I’ll do it!”

  He’d understood. Not just why she needed to be in control, but the courage it took her to wipe out the bad memories and replace them with good ones. She’d been a virgin; she had told the truth about that. She hadn’t known what to do, and she hadn’t expected the pain. But she had taken him anyway, sweetly, hotly, sliding her tight little body down on him and shattering his control the way no other woman had ever done.

  She could have been a spoiled, helpless little socialite; she should have been exactly that. Instead she had made the best of a tense, dangerous situation, done what she could to help and hadn’t voiced a single complaint.

  He liked being with her, liked talking to her. He was too much of a loner to easily accept the word love in connection with anyone other than family, but with Barrie…maybe. He wanted to spend more time with her, get to know her better, let whatever would develop get to developing.

  He wanted her.

  First things first, though. He had to get his strength back; right now he could walk from room to room without aid, but he would think twice about heading down to the stables by himself. He had to decide whether or not he was going to stay in the Navy; it felt like time to be moving on, since the reason he’d joined in the first place was being taken away from him as he moved up the ranks. If he wasn’t going to remain a SEAL, then what would he do for a living? He had to decide, had to get his life settled.

  Barrie might not be interested in any kind of relationship with him, though from the way Spook and Bunny had described her departure, he didn’t think that was the case. The day of lovemaking they had shared had been more than propinquity for both of them.

  Getting in touch with her could take some doing, though. That morning he had placed a call to the embassy in Athens. He’d given his name and asked to speak to Barrie Lovejoy. It had been Ambassador William Lovejoy who had come on the line, however, and the conversation hadn’t been cordial.

  “It isn’t that Barrie doesn’t appreciate what you did, but I’m sure you understand that she wants to put all of that behind he