Beneath the Veil Read online

  It wasn't any use, and I knew it. Daelyn was gone to some place I couldn't reach. I let her go, to sink back to her seat, and I walked away.

  The sitting room had gone cold, but I had no desire to light a fire. I sat in one of the soft chairs, aware that my tears had ceased to fall but without any relief of my suffering.

  The outer chamber door opened and Galya came in laughing, her cheeks pink and her eyes bright. She smelled like fresh, cold air. Lir was with her, commenting on something that had happened during the drills. His smile hurt me to see, and hurt more when it faded at the sight of me.

  "How is she?" Galya took off her cloak and scarf and hung them up. She gave a quick glance to Lir and then to me, but she was good at pretending she didn't notice the tension in the room.

  "The same. How do you expect her to be?"

  "I'll take my leave then," Lir said to Galya, ignoring me. He bent to kiss her cheek. I refused to allow jealousy to rise in me.

  "Tomorrow?" She asked. "I'm getting better with throwing the daggers, aren't I?"

  I'd been the one to teach her that. What his kiss hadn't done, his teaching now did. I got to my feet, hating them both. He blocked my way, and I pushed past him. My arm brushed his stomach as I passed. It was the first time we'd touched in so long.

  Behind me, I heard Galya's gasp of shock, and her cry, "Daelyn!"

  I ran back inside the room. The window beside which Dae had been spending all her time was open, a chill breeze making the fire flicker. Her chair was empty.

  "Did she climb out?" Lir ran to the window.

  Galya let out another cry and gripped the pane. "Oh, no!"

  I ran to the window and my foot caught on something that made me stumble. I bent down to release its grip on me. Daelyn's gown in a tangled pile on the floor. I shook it off and pushed next to Galya at the window.

  Outside there was a small balcony, more decorative than functional, large enough to hold one person, standing. Daelyn had climbed out onto it, then higher, onto the balustrade. She wore a white shift of thin linen, her arms outstretched at her sides. The wind molded the material to her body, and I noticed the changes in her form.

  "By Sinder's Arrow," Lir murmured from beside me. He'd noticed too.

  "Come back inside!" Galya cried. "Oh, Daelyn, please!"

  Daelyn didn't make any notice that she'd heard. Another gust of cold wind blew the curls back from her face and further outlined the swell of breasts that before had been nearly flat, the curve of a belly that had been lean with muscle.

  "She was wrong," I said. "The powder didn't make her infertile."

  Lir shot me a glance I couldn't even be grateful for at the moment. Galya only looked puzzled. Perhaps to her the changes in Daelyn's form were too subtle to notice, but I had attended her too long not to see the difference.

  I'd bled twice already since being in Elitan. "When was her last flow?"

  Galya shook her head. "I don't know."

  "She hasn't had one since she's been here, has she." It wasn't a question. I looked at Lir, who looked back. I'm sure my face was as stunned as his.

  "You can't mean –" Galya broke off with a strangled sob. "Oh, by Kedalya's Womb. She's pregnant?"

  Daelyn teetered on the edge of the railing but caught herself. Galya screamed. Lir leaped halfway out the window, but stopped himself. I saw why. The balcony, for all its fancy carving, was in great disrepair. At the far edge, it had separated from the palace wall. It was holding Daelyn's slight weight, but might not hold Lir's.

  "Dae, love. Come inside." He spoke soothingly, but the wind took his words away.

  Daelyn's head didn't even turn. She remained motionless, a statue. She didn't even shiver, and I couldn't understand how, since the air was still so bitter.

  "Let me," Galya said quietly. She pushed me and Lir aside and straddled the windowsill, with one foot outside on the balcony. "Daelyn, my love. Come inside. We'll talk about this together. Surely what you're feeling can't be so bad that we won't be able to help you."

  Dae's head tilted so slightly I wasn't sure she'd moved at all. Galya reached out a hand, her voice steady though tears shone in her eyes.

  "Daelyn, my love. Please come in. It's cold out there, and I'm afraid you'll be sick."

  Now Dae's head definitely turned. The familiar profile, sharper now with a thinness the rest of her body had countered, made me want to weep. Galya smiled and reached farther.

  "I'm glad to see you're up and around by yourself, sweetheart, but this really isn't the best place to be. It's cold out here, and dangerous. Please come in. Let me draw a bath for you. Let me take care of you."

  The love in Galya's voice was so poignant it made me look at Lir. He was looking back. We stared at each other while Galya spoke to Dae, urging her to come inside. My body trembled with a longing to touch his face, though I dared not.

  I loved this man, more than I'd ever loved anyone. If it had been him on the railing I would gladly have leaped out after him, if it meant my own death and his survival. The pain and beauty of my love made my body shake, because I had ruined it.

  "For your child," Galya said. "Think of that, Daelyn. Your own babe."

  "My son."

  I think all of us gasped at the sound of Dae's voice, silent for so long. It hadn't changed, hadn't grown softer or rougher, hadn't lost its constant edge of wit. She turned to face Galya. The wind whipped at the hem of her shift, and she stepped off the railing and onto the balcony.

  It creaked alarmingly and sank an inch. Galya yelped. Lir and I grabbed at the air. Daelyn only smiled and put her foot on the windowsill, gave her hand to Galya, let the former folly pull her inside.

  "I needed some fresh air," Daelyn said as nonchalantly as though she'd been taking a stroll around the garden.

  Galya hugged her fiercely, then pulled back and shook her. "You scared the life out of me, you foolish twit!"

  I expected Dae to be angry at such overfamiliar scolding, but she only leaned in to kiss Galya firmly on the mouth. "I'm sorry if I frightened you, my love."

  Galya pulled Dae toward a chair and fussed over her, covered her with a knitted blanket, knelt at her feet and warmed them with her hands. "What were you thinking, going out there like that? You could have been killed!"

  "I hadn't been thinking for such a very long time," Dae replied calmly. "I thought it was time I started again."

  Her gaze caught mine, and she looked at me, then Lir. "Don't you agree, Aeris?"

  Lir knelt in front of her. "Dae, we've been very worried about you."

  Daelyn waved a hand. "You have other business to worry about. Raising and training an army. 'Tis going to be spring, soon. When the snow melts, we'll be able to cross the mountains. We'll take back Alyria in full force."

  Galya rested her cheek on Daelyn's knee, and the prince stroked her maid's hair. "I've been learning to fight."

  "Good. We'll need every one we can get. Has my sister given you everything you need?"

  Lir shook his head with a bemused grin. "How like you, Dae. You kept us afraid for you for so many weeks and now you're back to ordering us around like nothing ever happened."

  A shadow passed along Daelyn's expression. "I was in a very dark place for awhile, Lir. But I'm out of it, now."

  She looked down at Galya. "Thanks to all of you."

  She looked at me again, then at Lir. "I'd like to be alone with Galya now. I think you two need to go somewhere alone and talk."

  Lir stiffened, his face going sour. "I don't have anything to say."

  Daelyn lifted a brow. "I am still your prince. When my son is born, I'll be your King. It's not a suggestion. It's an order."

  Lir shook his head. "You've been like a ghost for more than two months. You can't wake up and start issuing orders, especially about things you don't know anything about."

  "Can't I?" Daelyn's voice was as steely as I'd ever heard it. "I think I can. I won't have the two of you at odds like this. I love both of you too much to see you const