Wicked Attraction Read online

  “No. I guess not. But baby, darling, light of my life . . .” He ducked away from her playful swat, then came back to grab another kiss. “I don’t want you to feel like you can’t be yourself. It’s you who’s going to change all their minds, Nina. You being you.”

  “They want to see something pretty they can pity,” she said flatly.

  Ewan frowned. “I hate that you feel that way.”

  Nina shrugged, but her expression had twisted. Her eyes and mouth, both hard. “You and I both know that the only way we are going to sway their opinions and get their support is to be sure the cause doesn’t make them feel too uncomfortable. We have to make it trendy. If I can make them see me as something they can fix, they’ll be on board, all flags waving. I’ve never been much of a martyr, that’s all.”

  “Is that what this feels like you’re doing? Martyring yourself? Making yourself something to pity?”

  “Isn’t that what I am?” she asked him.

  Ewan kissed her. Held her close to him. “Never.”

  “Thank you, baby. I appreciate that.”

  “I appreciate you,” he said, thinking for a moment how she’d so laughingly said they were disgusting. Schmoopy. It was the truth, and he didn’t care.

  She snuggled close to him, her head on his shoulder. “You’re going to mess up my hair, and then we’ll really be late.”

  “I’d like to mess up more than that.”

  She laughed, sounding lighter. “Don’t start what you can’t finish.”

  “Oh, I can finish,” he began, but stopped himself when she playfully dug her knuckles into his sides.

  Her eyes blazed at the small groan of pleasure that slipped out of him at the dull pain. “Behave, or you’ll get a spanking.”

  “Promise?” he teased, but then kissed her knuckles and linked their fingers tightly together. “Nina, I mean it. If you’d feel more comfortable in your uniform, or whatever else you’d want to wear, then you should change your clothes. This isn’t about putting on a show . . .”

  She raised an eyebrow and pursed her lips. “Uh-huh.”

  “It’s not about making you feel on edge,” Ewan amended. “Or making you into something you’re not.”

  She sighed and caressed his cheek. “It’s not just the clothes. It’s that this is exactly what you just said it wasn’t. A show. The dress, the shoes, the hair, it’s all part of a costume. We’ll be telling them the truth about me, but at the same time, only the parts they’ll want to hear. It’s a complicated game.”

  “It’s politics,” he said.

  “And I’m not a politician.”

  “I’m not, either,” he reminded her.

  Nina smiled. “You’re better at it than I am. You can act the part. Kissing hands and shaking babies.”

  “I love you,” Ewan said.

  Nina smiled. “I love you, too.”

  “We got this,” he told her. “You and me together, baby.”

  Nina took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay. Let’s go do this.”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  It wasn’t really the clothes, the hair, the shoes, or cosmetics. Nina thoroughly enjoyed a little bit of glamour now and again, even if she was eternally grateful that looking pretty had never been necessary for her job. It was the idea that in order to convince them that they had to support rescinding the law, she had to make them think she was somehow . . . less.

  Her pride was never going to make this easy, she admitted to herself as she forced a wide, bright, and slightly vacant smile and took Ewan’s arm so they could enter the ballroom. Yes, the enhancement surgeries had given her the ability to use her body in ways none of the people in here would ever be able to. Yes, too, she needed the upgraded tech to keep herself not only capable of using those enhancements, but also to keep herself cognizant and alive and functional. It still rankled that she had to play on their sympathies, to portray herself as someone who was in any way, or who could ever be, helpless.

  It was worse because in some ways, that was exactly how she felt. Nina knew how to train her body to keep it working at top efficiency, but she continued to struggle with the constant ebb and flow of her emotions. They assaulted her, switching in the span of a heartbeat. She’d grown used to simply hiding them all, which left her so drained by the end of the day that she wanted to collapse into bed, where Ewan was usually waiting, eager for her body in ways she never wanted to deny. The highs were no easier to handle than the lows—right now, she was on the verge of tears because the sight of the crinkles in the corners of Ewan’s eyes had her loving him so much it felt as though she might die from the glorious agony of it.

  “Ewan!” The tall woman approached him with open arms and accepted a kiss on each cheek before she turned to greet Nina as warmly. “Nina. So good to see you. Your gown is exquisite.”

  “Thank you, Katrinka,” Nina said. At least she’d managed to get the right tone down. Blandly, vaguely, ditzy. All of them spoke that way, men and women alike. It was almost like a regional dialect, and she’d studied it the way she would have a different language. “Yours is gorgeous as well.”

  Katrinka beamed and tugged Nina’s arm to unlink it from Ewan’s so she could loop it through her own. “I’m going to steal you away from him now so I can introduce you all around the room. Ewan, that group of blowhards over there in the far corner has been waiting all night to talk to you. I think most of them are in support, but you know there are always that one or two that need to feel courted.”

  Ewan looked in the direction she pointed, then at Nina, his expression clearly asking her if she’d be all right without him. She would, of course. It was he who might run into trouble without her by his side, she couldn’t stop herself from thinking as Katrinka swept her away.

  “If I’d ever had a man who looked at me the way that man looks at you,” Katrinka said, “I wouldn’t want to be pulled away from him, either.”

  Nina let out a trilling laugh completely unlike her own. “It’s not that, although I won’t lie, he is awfully nice to be around.”

  “You’re worried about him?” Katrinka murmured as she grinned and greeted everyone they passed without stopping for more than a second to speak to any of them. So much for introducing Nina all around the room. “You think someone might try to hurt him.”

  “Old habits,” Nina said.

  Katrinka gave her a sideways glance. “We have very tight security here. One of your own is on board tonight, in fact. I think you know Allegra Chastain?”

  Nina looked in the direction Katrinka had nodded and recognized Al at once. Tonight she wore a dark maroon tunic spangled at the throat and sleeves with black beads and a matching pair of wide-legged trousers. She’d made the smarter choice of black boots instead of spiked heels like Nina’s. Al didn’t wear a harness the way Nina always had while on a job, but a slim-fitting belt carried Al’s choice of weaponry. Nobody would mistake her for a simple party guest.

  “Are you asking Al to give a speech, too?”

  Katrinka’s laughter tinkled like a fountain, and she waved a hand delicately, gesturing at nothing. “Oh, my. No. That would be imprudent, wouldn’t it?”

  “Al’s enhanced, the same as I am. She’s got as much of an interest in this happening as I do. As we all do.” Nina knew exactly what the other woman meant, but it rankled.

  “You, my dear, have been made the face of this effort. The beautiful, least-controversial face. You’re here to make an impression,” Katrinka continued in a low voice completely at odds with her light-hearted expression. “And not the kind you made when you punched my son.”

  Nina glanced at Al, who was rummaging through the buffet table, loading up her plate with stacks of appetizers. Al shoved a piece in her mouth, chewing rapidly as she balanced the plate in her other hand and perused the room, eyes narrowed, rocking on her heels. Al looked antagonistic. A little dangerous.

  Nina sighed. “I understand that.”

  “Please, don’t misunderstand me.” Katri