Double Act Read online

  We feel shaky. Our whole lives have been shaken up.

  Dad really has bought a bookshop! He didn’t even take us with him to check it out first. He went away for the weekend with Rose, and when he came back he said, ‘Guess what! I’ve bought a shop.’

  We just stared at him, stunned. He’s been acting so crazy. Not like a dad at all. Especially not our dad.

  We’re used to him saying, ‘Guess what! I’ve bought another box of books.’

  But you don’t buy a bookshop just like that. You’re meant to hang around for months, getting it surveyed and seeing solicitors.

  ‘It’s all simple,’ said Dad. ‘This sweet old couple are retiring and are happy to move out straightaway. If I can’t sell our own house, I’ll let it out to students for a bit. Your gran’s got her sheltered flat all worked out. Rose only rents her room, and she can shut up her stall in the arcade any time, so she hasn’t got any problems either.’

  We’re the ones with the problems. Garnet and me.

  We don’t even get considered.

  ‘Why didn’t you take us with you to see if we like it?’ I said.

  ‘You’ll love it,’ said Dad. ‘The village is right out in the country, beside a river, with hills all around. It’s a real story-book place. There’s a pond with puddleducks straight out of Beatrix Potter. There’s just this one street of shops. Ours is in the middle. We’ll fit it out with shelves and Rose can have the window for her bric-a-brac. She’s got all sorts of ideas for getting it done up. And there’s plenty of room upstairs. You two can have the attic for your bedroom – you’ll like that.’

  Sarah Crewe gets stuck in an attic in A Little Princess and she has to act like a servant to all the girls in her school. Though at least she got to stay in her school.

  We’ve had to leave our school.

  It was awful saying goodbye.

  But it was much worse saying goodbye to

  Ruby doesn’t want to write it. She always leaves the worst bit to me. I don’t want to write it either.

  Oh, Gran. We do miss you. We miss you ever so ever so much. You used to get cross and you were strict and sometimes you even smacked, but you didn’t hurt because of your poor hands and you couldn’t help being strict because you’re old and you were only cross when we were naughty.

  But we do so wish you were with us now. You could be cross and strict and smack all the time and we wouldn’t mind a bit.

  You didn’t get cross and strict and smack when we took you to your new flat. But you weren’t all happy and smiley. You looked so small and scrunched up and sad and it was so awful.

  We helped you put your chair and your china cabinet and all the rest of your stuff in your new room, but they didn’t look right. They didn’t look yours. It didn’t look like a home.

  This funny old man next door came round to say hello and he gave you a bunch of flowers he’d grown in his garden. Dad teased you and said you’d got yourself a boyfriend already, but you wouldn’t smile. And when Dad said he hoped you’d be really happy in your new flat and he was sure it was all for the best, you just sniffed. You didn’t say anything, but you looked at Dad and it was as if you were shrieking: Who are you kidding?

  You didn’t even kiss Dad properly goodbye, just gave him your cheek. And we don’t blame you either, Gran.

  You kissed us. And we kissed you. Lots and lots.

  We didn’t talk to Dad either. We’re still not speaking to him properly. Or Rose. We don’t need to. We can just speak to each other. In Twinspeak, so they can’t understand.

  Garnet and I have this special language. We’ve got heaps of made-up words for things. Sometimes we don’t use words at all, we use signs. Little tiny things like widening our eyes or putting our heads slightly to one side. We signal to each other and then both start up a pretend coughing fit or sneeze simultaneously or shriek with manic laughter.

  Rose isn’t used to this. It doesn’t half make her jump.

  ‘Pack it in,’ says Dad.

  I glance at Garnet.

  ‘Pack it in what, Dad?’ we say simultaneously.

  ‘Less of the cheek,’ says Dad, taking one hand off the steering wheel and swatting at us.

  ‘How do they do that?’ Rose asks.

  ‘How do we do what?’ we say.

  ‘Stop it! You’re giving me the creeps. Can you really read each other’s thoughts?’ she says, shivering.

  ‘Of course they can’t,’ says Dad.

  ‘Then how can they say the same thing at the same time in that weird way?’ Rose says, peering at us.

  ‘I don’t know,’ says Dad, shrugging.

  ‘We know,’ we say, and we raise our eyebrows and make our eyes glitter in a mysterious and mystic manner.

  We wait until Rose turns round again and starts fiddling with the old van radio, trying to tune it to a station. I point to it and nudge Garnet. We both start singing loudly, our timing spot on.

  Rose gasps.

  ‘Cut it out, twins,’ says Dad sharply.

  I turn my fingers into pretend scissors and make lots of cutting movements. Garnet does the same.

  ‘Oh, very funny,’ says Dad, not at all amused.

  When he’s concentrating on the road, I change the scissors to a dagger and mime a sudden bloody attack on Rose. Garnet does likewise, only she’s not quite quick enough. Dad sees, so Garnet shakes her arm quickly, making out she’s got cramp.

  ‘What are you playing at, you two?’ says Dad.

  We blink at him and shrug.

  Dad sighs with exasperation, and then takes one hand off the steering wheel and puts his arm round Rose.

  I nudge Garnet and we both make a very rude noise.

  Dad’s hand tightens on Rose’s shoulder, but he doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t say anything either. Neither do we. The radio keeps buzzing and fading and going funny.

  I feel a bit like that too. Maybe I’m starting to feel car-sick. Well, van-sick. Ooh good, if I’m going to throw up then I shall aim at Rose.

  Ruby was sick. She managed to hit Rose. And me.

  Only little splashes on you.

  You’re not supposed to be writing, in case you get sick again.

  I did great, didn’t I?

  Yes, but I’d sooner you didn’t do it again. Rose got through a whole box of tissues, mopping away. Dad had to stop at the next service station and we had to go to the Ladies. I washed and Ruby washed. Rose positively scrubbed and changed her sweater and jeans, scrunching the stained smelly stuff into a plastic bag.

  ‘I think you two belong in the bag too,’ she said, sighing. ‘Look, I don’t care if you act like idiots, but it isn’t half upsetting your dad.’

  We didn’t say anything. But Ruby smiled, even though she was still sick and shivery.

  ‘Don’t you want your dad to be happy?’ said Rose, looking at Ruby and then at me.

  Not with you!

  ‘He’s had a really tough time the last few years. You two were only tiny so you probably didn’t realize, but he nearly went to pieces after your mum died.’

  We stared at her silently, hating her. How dare she! We felt like we were in little pieces too.

  ‘It was really tough for him, but he kept on going for your sake. He did his best to get on with your gran, even though she can be so difficult at times.’

  How does she have the nerve to criticize our gran!

  ‘He didn’t have any fun, he never went out anywhere, he was so lonely,’ she said.

  How could he possibly have been lonely? He had us!

  ‘He kept slaving away at that boring old job in the city, even though it nearly drove him crazy. He was like this old old man even though he’s barely thirty.’

  She’s mad. He’s our dad. He is old.

  ‘But now he’s got this big chance. A whole new life. Something that he’s always wanted. And he’s been like a little kid – so excited. But you two are spoiling it all. Can’t you see that?’

  Yes, we can see it. That’s w