Love Lessons Read online

  and I bet you'll have a struggle to even remember my name.'

  'Will you always remember my name?'

  'Oh yes. There'll be no forgetting you, Prudence King.'

  'You haven't kissed any of the other girls at school?'

  'For God's sake, what do you think I am? Of course not.'

  209

  'But you're glad now t h a t you kissed me?'

  'I'm very happy, very unhappy, very confused,'

  he said. 'I don't know what to do now.' He let out his breath in a long sigh. 'I really don't know.'

  I couldn't see his face properly in the dark. I felt it very gently with my fingers.

  'I think you're looking sad. Please don't be sad, Rax. Be happy. I'm happy, the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. I never dreamed I could feel like this. I've read all sorts of books, I've pretended stuff, but I had no idea it would feel so wonderful.'

  'Oh Prue. Come here.' He pulled me nearer, his arms right round me, holding me tight, my head on his chest. I was stretched sideways, bits of the car sticking into my waist and hip and leg, but I'd have happily let someone saw right through me just to stay in his arms. He very gently kissed the top of my head, nuzzling into my hair.

  'It's s t a r t i n g to escape from t h e topknot already,' he said. 'Ouch, there's a hairpin! Do you mind if I take the pins out and let it hang free again? Your new hairstyle's very sophisticated, but I like it better the old way.'

  I shook it free at once, combing it with my hands. Rax played with it too, winding strands round his fingers.

  'I love your hair,' he said.

  'It's horrible! I wish I had straight silky hair.'

  'Your hair's like you.'

  'Yes, wild and mad and untidy.'

  210

  'OK, wild, but also springy and full of life.

  And utterly uncontrollable. What am I going to do with you, Prue? What are we going to do?'

  'I know,' I said. 'We're going to start driving and keep on driving, all through the night, until we get somewhere we've never been before, where no one knows us, and we'll start our new life together, Prue and Rax. We'll find some old cottage or beach shack, we'll live very frugally on bread and cheese

  – maybe chips! – and you won't go to work and I won't go to school. We'll paint all day. You'll teach me lots of things. We'll go for long walks hand in hand and in the evenings we'll curl up together and then we'll read. Maybe you'll read to me –

  would you like that?'

  'I'd like that. I'd like all of it,' said Rax. 'If only!'

  'Let's make a wish t h a t it will come true some day,' I said. I reached up and pulled out one of my spiralling hairs.

  'What are you doing?'

  I found his left hand and wrapped my hair round and round his ring finger. 'There! That means t h a t one day you'll be mine. I'm wishing it. You wish it too, Rax. Come on, close your eyes and wish!

  'Sometimes you're more like four t h a n fourteen,' said Rax. But then he went quiet, holding onto his own hand. I knew he was wishing too.

  'OK. That's the future taken care of,' he said.

  'But we're still in the present now. I've got two 211

  little children and a sick wife at home. If she wakes up she'll be wondering what the hell has happened to me. I'm wondering. Maybe I've gone crazy. Come on, let's get you back home again.'

  'It's still quite early. We could stay another half hour, easily.'

  'No, it's time to go, Prue,' he said, gently pushing me back into my seat.

  We drove off down the lane.

  'We could drive up to Scotland, down to Cornwall, across to Wales—' I said.

  'We could. But we're not going to. We're going to take you straight back home, OK?'

  'This time.'

  'This time,' Rax said.

  'But one day—'

  'Yes, one day,' he repeated wearily.

  'Are you just humouring me?' I asked.

  'Yes. And humouring myself too.'

  'We'll work it all out, Rax, you'll see. I swear I won't make things difficult for you at school.

  I'll be the total soul of discretion. Don't laugh at me, I will. I'll do whatever you say, I promise, just so long as I can still see you in secret just a little bit.'

  I went on burbling, fearful now because Rax had gone so quiet. But when we came to my street he p a r k e d a little way up the road, glanced round quickly and then gave me one last long wondrous kiss.

  'Out you get, right now, or I really will drive off with you,' he said.

  212

  'Then I'm staying!'

  'Prue. Please. Go now.'

  'One more kiss?'

  'What happened to your doing whatever I say?'

  'OK, OK. Goodnight, darling Rax. See you at school.'

  'Ssh! Yes, right. Off you go now, there's a good girl. No hanging about or waving or blowing kisses, OK?'

  I got out of the car and walked obediently to the shop door without even turning round. I unlocked the door and stepped inside, into the stale, musty world of sad old books t h a t no one wanted to read any more.

  Mum was upstairs in the kitchen with all our bank statements and bills spread all over the table.

  'Oh Mum, put them away. They'll just stop you sleeping,' I said.

  Mum looked at me, red-eyed. 'I'm not sleeping whether I look at them or not,' she said. She paused, glancing at some of the crumpled bills.

  'I had no idea,' she said. 'I can't work out your dad's system. I know I don't have a head for business but even I can see you need to pay your bills, you can't just let them slide.'

  I didn't w a n t to slide down this familiar dreary slope with Mum. I wanted to stay soaring above the stars with Rax.

  'I tried to tackle your dad about it, but he was in one of his moods. He really doesn't like it 213

  when you're babysitting, Prudence. I think it worries him. Well, it worries me, dear. It's too much responsibility for a girl your age.'

  'Mum, please. Look, I'm tired, I'm going to bed.'

  Grace was waiting for me too, asking endless questions. I took no notice, humming under my breath as I got ready for bed.

  'Do you really love Rax?' she asked. 'You do?

  You are weird, Prue. What's the point? I mean, obviously he doesn't love you.'

  'How do you know?' I said, before I could stop myself.

  'He's married, he's got children!' said Grace.

  'I know. But t h a t doesn't stop you falling in love if the right person comes along.'

  'You are so nuts!' said Grace. Then she paused.

  'You don't mean it, do you? Prue, has he said anything? Has he told you stuff? Has he kissed you?' She started spluttering with laughter, lying back on her bed and drumming her legs in idiotic fashion.

  'Stop it!' I said. 'Stop being so ridiculous!'

  'Imagine kissing Rax!' Grace chortled. 'Oh yuck yuck yuck! That stupid beard mustn't half scratch and tickle!'

  'Just shut up, you fat lump. I don't know why you find it so funny. No one's ever going to want to kiss you. You're pathetic.'

  Grace stopped, as if I'd thrown a bucket of water over her. 'You're the one who's pathetic,'

  she said. 'You're the one everyone laughs about at school. You're the one who gets a stupid crush 214

  on a manky old teacher. You're the one who pretends all sorts of stupid stuff, making out you're having this big grown-up affair when all the time I bet he's just feeling sorry for you!'

  I flew at her, putting my hand over her mouth to stop her saying it. She struggled and then bit my fingers hard. I slapped her; she pulled my hair. I tried to bang her head, she kicked at me, and then we rolled off the bed with a thump.

  'Girls, girls! Whatever's happening!' Mum shouted, rushing in.

  We were still kicking and slapping there on the floor.

  'Just you stop that, both of you! What are you playing at? Have you both gone demented? I need you to be grown-up sensible girls, yet here you are behaving appallingl