Empty Net Read online

  Audrey couldn’t believe Levi was gone. How could he leave her? She did everything! She loved him with everything inside her. Gave him anything he wanted. Made sure, he was fully loved. Took the crap he dished out, and also the pain during sex. So he liked to choke her when they did it. Everyone had their quirks, she just hoped one day she too would like it, even though it really didn’t seem like she would.

  But that wasn’t the only reason she was crying. How could she sleep with a man she didn’t know!? Why did she miss this nameless man! Why could she still feel his lips along her spine, and collar bone? Why did she feel so good after last night, and not in pain? He was a big dude, huge even, and Audrey swore nothing hurt. Everything ached, but in a good way. She wanted him again, and that alone was bad, very bad.

  What the hell was wrong with her!? Why the hell did Fallon have to be getting married? Didn’t she understand that Audrey needed her? That Audrey would never be able to have her Happily Ever After? It wasn’t fair! Audrey loved with everything inside of her, and she kept getting shit on. When she made a mistake, she found herself thinking it to death before she was able to let it go. Not only was she going to be torturing herself, trying to figure out why Levi really thought this other girl was better, but she would also try to figure out why she thought it was a good idea to sleep with Blondie. Again, no telling what she could have caught from him.

  Damn it. That was two calls she needed to make, all because she was dumb and went home with a man she didn’t know. Blah.

  Where the hell was that damn violin!?

  Audrey wrapped her arms around her legs, and leaned her head on her knees, letting the tears roll down her legs. She hated feeling like this. She wanted to be happy. She was damn near 30. Shouldn’t she have her shit together by now? Audrey shook her head, wiping her cheeks with the palm of her hand before inhaling a deep breath. She looked up at her shelves, and couldn’t bring herself to be excited about how fantastic her shoes would look on them. She would much rather have a nursery, with a sweet baby in it. But that was an untouchable dream, something she would never be blessed with. At least not the way she wanted it to happen.

  When Audrey heard the sounds of a piano, she let out a thankful sigh. She stood up quickly, getting her beer and chocolate before leaning up against the wall that she shared with her neighbor. It would always get on Levi’s nerves when her neighbor played his piano, but it was honestly the highlight of Audrey’s day. And right now, it couldn’t have been a more welcomed sound. As she listened to her neighbor’s skillful hands move along the keys, playing the most beautiful song ever, A Drop in the Ocean, by Ron Pope, Audrey found herself singing along, instead of thinking of things she couldn’t change. She needed this escape, especially after the night and morning she had had.

  All of a sudden she started crying again, she couldn’t help it. She was completely alone and probably would always be. No man would want someone who couldn’t have children. It had been almost 10 years since she was told she couldn’t carry her own child and she couldn’t understand why she was still broken apart about it? Why couldn’t she get over it and just live her life? There were men out there who wouldn’t mind adopting or being with just her, but damn it, it had been 10 years and she hadn’t found him.

  Men wanted their own children, and when she would find one who didn’t care, she learned later that it was because they never really planned to stay with her. She was just the nice one, the one who would be there when they needed her. Buy them things when they needed them. Be the easy lay. She was so desperate to be in love that she did just about anything to get there.

  Audrey moved her hands along her cheeks as hiccup sobs left her body. She had so many plans when she was younger. So many, and all of them were gone now. If she would have been strong and stood up to her father when she had the chance, she wouldn’t be here; she would be doing what she wanted. Instead, she was working a job she hated, involved in relationships with deadbeats, and would never be able to hold a child who she grew inside of her.

  It wasn’t fair.

  But it was her life.

  ***

  Tate slammed his stick against the goal post.

  What the fuck was his problem! That was two goals in 52 seconds! He never let goals in that quickly and for the first time he had! Tate inhaled a deep cleansing breath. He wasn’t himself, and that needed to change. There was no way he was going to let the Assassins’ lose to the Ducks, the worst team in the NHL. He was one of the three top goalies in the league! He had to get his head in the game. He had to.

  Tate slammed his stick against his pads before standing high and looking out at the ice. His captain, Shea Adler, and his alternate captain, Jacob Titov, stood together as three forwards skated around, getting ready for the puck to be dropped. Tate glanced over to where coach Bacter stood, yelling his ass off. He never really talked to the guys when they were on the ice; he was more of a yeller.

  And he scared the living shit out of Tate.

  Tate’s career was in the hands of Bacter. If he kept messing up, all Bacter had to do was say he wanted someone else, and Tate would be back in Florida on the Assassins’ farm team, something he didn’t want. He loved his team. Adler, Titov, Brooks, and Anderson were his friends. Real friends. He hadn’t felt like he was at home until meeting those guys. He was also getting used to Nashville, and he was getting settled into his condo. Things were good.

  Except for the fact that the first time he has sex in months, the girl he wakes up next to shoots out of the room faster than a puck being shot into a goal by his captain. It was depressing and it really did fuck with his head. Was he that horrible? Did he not give her everything she wanted? He had made sure to give more than he took, but it must have not been good enough. What did he do wrong? But most of all, why was he letting this affect his game!

  Tate smacked his pads again, taking in another cleansing breath. He had a game to win. He would think about his issues with the un-named girl later.

  After the game Tate sat by his locker, with his head between his knees. How he ended up winning would always be a mystery to him. He was a mess between those steel pipes and he didn’t know if he was going to be able to be the goalie that the Assassins needed. At one point he had completely blacked out from all the adrenaline coursing through his system. Finally he got his head in the game and nothing else mattered. Not the thousands of people watching or the Brunette Beauty from two days ago.

  She was still heavy on his mind as he took in deep shuddering breaths. All he could see was the worried lines between her eyes as she looked for her clothes. She was in such a hurry to leave. It was as if she couldn’t get away from him quickly enough. Was he really that awful? He could have sworn they had a good time. Tate knew he had taken exceptional care of her in a bed that was big even to him. He had been the perfect lover and man, was she a hot little thing!

  He still wasn’t breathing right after the ways she worked him. She had him yelling out things that he normally wouldn’t say. She was gorgeous and sexy, and he wanted more. But he hadn’t gotten her number, or hell, even her name. How was he supposed to find a woman who didn’t want to be found?

  “Goldie! What the hell is wrong with you?”

  Tate looked up to see Lucas Brooks standing in front of him already dressed and ready to go. Tate sat in his gear, still sweaty. As he looked around the room, he saw that he was the last one still in gear. Not that it mattered; the team couldn’t leave without him. He looked back up into Lucas’ eyes and shrugged his shoulders.

  “Nothing, just thinking.”

  Lucas scoffed, “Are you still thinking of the runaway lay? Let her go, she obviously wasn’t worth your time.”

  Tate shook his head, “She was amazing.”

  Lucas laughed, “Dude, she’s the first girl in months. You’ll find another.”

  Tate ran his hands through his short hair. He hated his new haircut. He liked his blonde hair long, not in a short cut, but the guys had made fun of him,