BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR Read online

  "No. Really. We had a great time, and I thought I wanted to..."Arden sighed. "But then I didn't. It's complicated."

  Lida made a clucking sound. "I know, hon. But you had a good time?"

  "Yes. Definitely."

  "And you'll go out with him again?"

  Arden smiled as she snuggled down further into the pillows. "I think so. Maybe."

  Lida crowed so loudly Arden had to hold the phone away from her ear. "You liked him!"

  "I liked him."

  "But...?"

  "But nothing." She looked at the clock again. "Listen, Lida, Bev and my dad are bringing the kids over in about two hours, and I have a lot of work I need to catch up on before then. Can I call you later?"

  Lida made a disappointed noise. "Okay. You working tomorrow?"

  "Bright and early, as usual. The girls will be in school and out from under my feet." Sudden melancholy overtook her. "I didn't mean that. I love my girls."

  "I know what you meant, Arden. You don't have to explain it to me. I've got four of the angel-monsters myself, remember?" Lida gave a low, hoarse chuckle. "And speaking of them, I hear Danny pounding on Henry pretty hard. I'd better go referee. I'll stop in tomorrow, okay?"

  They hung up and Arden pulled the covers up to her nose, reliving last night. Had that really happened? Had she really had cybersex with Shane? Oh, good gravy. She really had.

  She couldn't stop smiling.

  It was wrong. But it felt oh, so good. Decadent, like eating the entire box of Godiva by herself, only without the damage to her thighs.

  She stretched and yawned, luxuriating in the soft bed and warm covers. She reached out a hand to the empty space beside her. For the first time since Jason's death, she didn't want to weep at the vast expanse in the king-size bed beside her. She rolled over to look at the place he'd always slept, at the extra pillow she hadn't been able to bear removing, though she never used it.

  She'd turned a corner. Maybe not in a way everyone would approve of, but her date last night and the session on the computer had done more than ease the sexual frustration she'd been trying to ignore. It had opened her up to starting fresh.

  "Good morning," she said aloud, to nobody, and didn't feel sad that she spoke to an empty room.

  * * * *

  Her breakfast of bagel and coffee interrupted by the slamming of the front door, Arden put down the thick Sunday paper and turned in her chair toward the sound of pounding feet. Two shouting voices greeted her. Four small arms flung themselves around her. Two sets of sweet pink lips fought to kiss her cheeks first.

  "Hello, my lovelies," she said in what the girls called her pirate voice. She squeezed them until they screamed, then swatted them on the rears and sent them to the cupboard for the doughnuts she'd brought home from the bakery. "Hi, Bev. Where's Dad?"

  Bev gave one of her patented eye rolls. "Worn out from those two." She jerked her thumb toward the powdered-sugar smeared Aislin and Maeve, who giggled. "They kept us up all night."

  Arden turned to give mock stern look. "Did you really?"

  "Yes!" cried Aislin.

  Her sister answered, "Yes, Mommy, we did."

  Bev nodded with a wry grin. "They sure did. All the way to ten P.M."

  "Is ten P.M. all night, Mommy?" asked Aislin, the serious one.

  "For Grampa, it is," Arden replied. She glanced into the living room, freshly vacuumed and tidied. Ah, well, life was short. "Why don't you girls go into the living room with your doughnuts and watch some cartoons while I talk to Gran?"

  The look her daughters gave each other was absolutely priceless. With identical grins, they took her up on the offer and went to camp out in front of the cartoon channel.

  Bev helped herself to a cup of coffee and sat down, then snagged a doughnut for herself. "So? How was it?"

  Arden laughed and shook her head. "You and Lida, I swear. The third degree. It was very nice."

  Bev gave an exaggerated stare around the kitchen. "Is he still here?"

  "NO!" Then, softer, with a glance toward the girls, Arden said, "No. Of course not."

  Bev chuckled. "Oh, honey, your cheeks are bright red. Did he at least give you a good night kiss?"

  A flashback of Philip's tongue in her mouth and his hand on her breast made Arden get up to refresh her still-full mug. "Yes."

  "Are you going to see him again?"

  "If he asks." Arden looked at Bev. "It was fun to get out. I'd forgotten how much fun it was."

  She gave another glance to her sweet angel-monsters. A guilty glance, this time. "It was nice to get out without the girls."

  Bev nodded. "I know. Those girls are your life. Anyone who knows you can see that. Don't let it upset you that you went out and had a good time without them."

  Arden sighed. "I'm all they have left."

  "Oh, honey." Bev reached around to hug her. "Even if Jason were still alive, you'd want to have some time to yourself once in a while. Being a single parent isn't easy."

  "At least I have you and Dad. The girls love going with you."

  "And we love having them." Bev patted Arden's shoulder before pulling away. "Don't you ever worry about that. You need to take time for yourself, Arden, or you won't be good to anyone. You're a good mom, honey. Your daughters love you. Don't feel bad because you went out on a date."

  "It's a lot to think about, Bev. Dating. A boyfriend. Maybe getting married again. How'd you do it?"

  "When I met your dad, I had no choice." Bev grinned. "Fell in love. It happens."

  Arden looked to her girls again. "I'm not sure if I'm ready for anything like that."

  "Don't worry," Bev said. "If it happens for you, you will be."

  * * * *

  "So, are you going to go out with him?"

  "Lida, I don't know." Arden bit off the thread and shook out the skirt she'd been working on. The silky material fell in soft silver folds to the floor. "This fabric costs twenty-five dollars a yard. I can't afford to mess up."

  "You're avoiding the subject." Lida plucked a dress off the rack and held it up in front of her. "Your talent is wasted with stuff like this, you know."

  "My talent, as you put it, is in taking the jobs I'm offered." Arden looked at the ruffled and sequined monstrosity Lida was now hanging back on the rack. "Even if it's a fashion nightmare, that's what the girl wanted for her Homecoming dress. She wanted to be the only one wearing it."

  "She will be."

  Arden laughed and rolled her neck on her shoulders, then scrubbed at her eyes. She'd been up late again, working on the computer. Fooling around on the computer, she amended mentally. Waiting for a message that never came.

  "So are you going to go out with him or not?"

  Arden sighed and looked up. "He asked me out again. I said I was busy. He said he'd call back. He hasn't. He probably won't. Does that make you happy?"

  "No! Why'd you do that?" Lida's level stare made Arden squirm. "He goes out with other women. I saw him last night at The Fenwick with Babs Stanley."

  "He was?" Realizing she sounded jealous, Arden modified her tone. "He's allowed."

  Lida put her hands on her hips. "Babs Peanut-butter-legs Stanley, Arden!"

  "Peanut butter legs?"

  "They're easy to spread," Lida explained and made a crude gesture. "He's not dating her, Arden. He's--"

  "Lida, that's Philip's business, not mine." She couldn't very well say anything, could she? Not after what she'd done with Shane. Okay, so computer sex wasn't real, but it was close enough.

  "And that doesn't bother you?" Lida sounded so affronted, Arden got up from the sewing machine to sit next to her friend.

  "Lida, Philip really was everything you promised me he'd be. We did hit it off. And I almost did it. I almost slept with him. I wanted to. Just not bad enough."

  "Damn us women and our tender hearts," Lida grouched, propping her feet on Arden's filing cabinet. "It's not fair that men can go out and sow their wild oats and we can't."

  "It's okay. I don't min