Wanna Be Yours Read online

Eric gave the other man a nod. “Hey, Jon. Good morning.”

  “Good to see you. She’s doing better today.”

  There was no “doing better” for Harriet. Not really. Still, Eric gave the nurse a grateful smile and clipped the visitor badge to the front of his jacket.

  Harriet’s room smelled of the dirty water in the bottom of the vase of flowers he made sure were delivered to her every week. She was in bed, her eyes closed, her hands folded on top of the blankets. She looked even thinner than she had the last time he’d seen her, two weeks ago. She didn’t stir when he took the vase and pushed the dead blooms into the trash, then went into her bathroom to rinse the glass.

  She was awake when he came out of the bathroom though. Her gaze fixed on him. The last stroke had left her non-verbal, but she raised a hand for him to take.

  Eric pressed his lips to the back of her hand and held it between both of his. “Hi, beautiful.”

  Harriet managed a smile, the left side of her face drooping. She had the strength to squeeze his fingers, but only a little. After a moment, she stopped. He put her hand back on top of the covers.

  “I brought a new book for us.” He held up the paperback copy of a popular bestseller that had recently been made into a movie.

  He read aloud to her for about twenty minutes before glancing up to see her staring, a glint of tears in her eyes. Eric put down the book. Took her hand again.

  “It’s all right,” he told her. “You’re all right.”

  In their time together, she would have punished him severely for the lie. Now, Harriet merely closed her eyes. She didn’t even squeeze his fingers this time. Eric watched her silently for a moment or so, until it became obvious she was asleep. Still, he sat with her, knowing that she might not be able to feel him with her, might not even remember who he was. He needed to stay here anyway, for himself.

  They’d met when he still lived in Pennsylvania at a local munch, a social outing for a group of kinksters Eric had become involved with after figuring out that vanilla dating wasn’t going to work for him. Harriet had been older, much older, a grande dame in the group who’d taken him under her wing. It hadn’t been long before he’d been serving her in an arrangement that had worked out well for both of them despite the age difference. It had been affectionate and more than platonic, but not particularly sexual. Their relationship had ended amicably when he’d decided to take the job in Dayton. Harriet had, in fact, insisted he take it. Better hours, better pay, better quality of living. She’d always encouraged him to be the best man he could be.

  If she’d known then that she was going to be so sick…If either of them had known, Eric wondered, would he have stayed? Or would he still have gone?

  “Oh.”

  He looked up at the sound of the voice from the doorway. “Hi, Karen.”

  “I didn’t know you’d be here. They changed out the visitor form. I didn’t see your name.”

  “I can go,” he said and stood.

  Karen looked at the book on the bed. Her mouth twisted. “You’re reading that to my mother?”

  “She likes this author.”

  “My mother would not read that sort of trash,” Karen said stiffly. She had not moved more than a step into the room and stared at Eric the way she always did, as though expecting him to jump her. If she wore pearls, she’d be clutching them.

  “I think we’ve already had this conversation,” he told her. “I’ll get out of your way.”

  He waited until she’d moved into the room so he could get out of it. He took the book with him, not trusting her not to throw it away once he’d gone. When he passed, Karen visibly cringed and sniffed aloud, like he smelled bad.

  The woman had hated Eric since the first moment she’d met him. She’d never respected his relationship with her mother. She’d gone so far as to accuse him of being a gold digger, a male escort, even “one of those fags that prey on lonely old women.” He’d ignored all the previous viciousness. He could ignore this, too.

  “I’m working on a court order forbidding you to see her,” Karen said suddenly, abruptly, as though the words flew out of her mouth before she could stop them.

  This was too much. Eric turned toward her. “What?”

  “You heard me. A court order. You shouldn’t be allowed to harass her any longer! I have her medical Power of Attorney. I’m going to make sure you can’t have anything to do with her!”

  His fists clenched. Karen saw it. This time, instead of flinching, she gave him a hard, brittle grin.

  Eric forced his fingers to uncurl. “You can’t do that.”

  “Oh, yes. I can. I can certainly declare her incompetent. I can declare you a threat and a detriment to her health.”

  “If there’s anyone in her life who ought to have the final say in her medical care, it’s me,” Eric spat.

  “Just because you’re a doctor—”

  “No,” Eric cut in. “No, Karen. Not because I’m a fucking doctor. Because I love her. And she loves me. You don’t have to like or approve of it, or even understand it, and frankly, I don’t care if you do or don’t. Your mother didn’t, either. You have the letter she sent you.”

  About half a year after they’d been together, Harriet had outlined their relationship to her children, making sure they understood that how she chose to spend her time, and with whom, was not their business. Her son Derek didn’t like Eric, but he loved his mom and had accepted her choices. Karen never had.

  Karen’s mouth worked. Her expression crumpled. She turned her back on him, and her shoulders lifted and fell. “You…you made her…you influenced her….”

  “Anyone who ever met your mother knows nobody in the world could make her do something she didn’t want to. Especially not me.”

  “You lurk around her like a vulture. Waiting for her to die. I know you’re in her will. But I’ll fight that, too.”

  “I come back here when I can to see her, Karen, because I think it brings her comfort to see me. Because your mother, whether you like it or not, was important to me.”

  “You left her!”

  Eric ground his teeth together. “We agreed to end our exclusive relationship when I was offered the job in Ohio. Your mother was the one who wanted me to go. We stayed in touch, even before she fell ill. We were still close. You know that.”

  “Too close,” Karen muttered, voice filled with disgust. “Get out. Please.”

  He left, not because he wanted to give Karen the satisfaction, but so that their arguing didn’t wake and upset Harriet. In his rental car, he put his face in his hands while he fought not to rage or weep at the utter unfairness of it all. It would be better if Harriet had died, he thought, not for the first time, and hated himself for thinking it. Better that she’d be entirely gone than trapped in this fading existence, fought over by her distant, judgmental daughter.

  When the urge to punch something had left him, well, mostly anyway, since Eric wasn’t sure he’d ever stop feeling like he wanted to punch something when he thought of Harriet, he headed for the coffee shop. The Morningstar Mocha had undergone a bit of a renovation over the past few years. Different, expanded menu and larger dining space. Some of the regulars had changed, too, along with most all of the staff except one familiar face.

  “Hey, Tesla. How’s it going?” Eric greeted her.

  Tesla sported a white tee-shirt emblazoned with a series of black lines that formed the face of Disney’s Maleficent, a single slash of red marking the witch’s mouth. The barista’s belly pushed at the front of the shirt, round with her pregnancy. She grinned at him as she slid a mug across the counter toward him. She also pulled out a teapot from beneath the counter and set it next to the mug so she could add hot water and tea to it.

  “Hey, there, long time no see. At the moment, I am getting hammered in the kidneys by this imminent squish.” She patted her belly. “Other than that, and the fact I can’t sleep through the night, I’m terrific. How’ve you been?”

  He had to grin.