Don't Deny Me Read online

  “Earth to Alice.” Jay sounded annoyed. “Hello!”

  Alice gave him an apologetic smile. “I don’t know. First times should be special, you know?”

  “I’ve known you for a long time. It would not be your first time.”

  “You know what I mean,” Alice told him. “The first time for us. I’m not sure I want to do it in Bernie’s guest bedroom with everyone around. It should be … you know. Special. What?”

  Jay had given her such a stunned look, Alice was confused.

  “Oh. My. God,” he said. “You are totally fucked, Alice. You know that, right? Utterly and completely fucked.”

  “Why?” she cried, heart and stomach both twisting.

  “You’re in love with Mick!”

  “No.” Alice shook her head firmly. “No way. It’s too soon for that.”

  “Soon or not,” Jay said, “you’d better put on your crash gear, baby, because if you aren’t yet, you’re about to fall for that guy. Super hard.”

  * * *

  “Mick! Welcome.” Cookie, Bernie’s wife, beamed and gestured for him to come inside. “We’re so glad you could join us.”

  He kissed her cheek and handed her the basket of breads and cheeses he’d picked up on the way from one of the farmers’ markets. Normally shopping in a place like that gave Mick hives, but somehow a case of light beer and some tortilla chips just didn’t seem like the right thing to bring to this kind of party. How he’d even managed to become a part of this crowd, he had no idea, but he was glad he had, because of Alice.

  “Jay and Alice are driving together and they’re on their way. Paul called to say he’d be here in a half hour. Dayna is coming, too. You haven’t met her yet. She’s a friend of mine from work. Tanya unfortunately won’t make it, she’s actually moved to Ohio to take a new job. But that makes room for new friends!” Cookie peeked into the basket and made a sound of appreciation. “Oh, this looks wonderful. You didn’t have to, Mick.”

  “Of course I did. My mom told me never to go to a party without taking something for the hostess.” Mick followed her inside and carefully closed the door behind him, then waited for an awkward second. “So … should I put …”

  Cookie, halfway up the stairs to the living room, turned. “Oh! Do you mind the rumpus room bedroom? You had it last time, and I know some people don’t care for it, but—”

  “No, that’s great, actually.” Mick looked toward the stairs to the lower level. “Let the wild rumpus start, right?”

  Cookie laughed. “Get settled, and then come upstairs. I’m going to slice this bread and we can have wine. You drink wine, don’t you, Mick?”

  “I’ll drink whatever you have,” he told her honestly, and took his things into the small basement room he’d used the last time. He tossed his bag on the bed, thinking he’d unpack it later, if at all, but for a second he sat. Testing the mattress. Thinking about Alice and if this was where they’d finally make good on all those subtle promises they’d been making to each other over the past couple of months.

  The thought stirred him up, so he forced himself to stand. In the small attached bathroom, Mick splashed his face with cool water. For good measure, he brushed his teeth. They hadn’t talked about how they were going to handle sharing what they’d been up to with the rest of the weekend crowd, but he was sure that if he had the chance to kiss Alice, he was going to take it.

  Upstairs in the kitchen, Mick took a glass of wine and plate of bread, cheese, and mustard, along with some small sausages Cookie had cut. Bernie offered him a cigar, too. Mick wasn’t much of a smoker, but when in Rome, he supposed.

  “Living like kings,” Bernie said.

  “And queens,” Cookie added archly. “But smoke outside.”

  On the deck, Mick tried not to pace or act antsy, though as forty minutes and then almost an hour passed without Alice’s arrival, he was starting to go a little nuts. Paul showed up laden with bottles of wine with labels the names of which Mick couldn’t even pronounce.

  “How’s it going?” Paul leaned against the railing, a glass of wine in his hand. He held out his hand for Mick’s cigar.

  After a second, Mick gave it to him. He watched the other man take a long puff and then look over the cigar with an assessing eye. He waved it away when Paul offered to hand it back, though. “You keep it.”

  “Not into cigars?”

  Not into sharing them with other dudes he barely knew, Mick thought, but shrugged an answer, instead. He sipped his wine and listened for the sound of tires crunching on the gravel. The French doors opened behind them, and he was already turning at the sound of a new female voice, but it wasn’t Alice. A pretty blonde in a flowy sundress stood there.

  “Hi. I’m Dayna. Cookie sent me out here to meet you … Mick?” She pointed at him. “And Paul?”

  Paul straightened. “Well, hey, now. Hi.”

  Dayna laughed and shook her head, her blond ponytail swinging. She stepped carefully out onto the deck, her feet bare. She’d painted her toenails red, Mick noticed. Everything about her seemed designed to make a man notice.

  She shook Paul’s hand, then turned to Mick. “Hi.”

  He shook it, but didn’t let their hands linger too long against each other. Dayna wasn’t used to men who didn’t linger. Mick saw that at once in the slightly confused look she gave him, but her expression turned knowing in the next second when the doors opened again. She turned to follow Mick with her gaze, but everything about his concentration had turned to Alice.

  “Hi,” Alice said with a small wave.

  And though he’d imagined himself sweeping her into his arms and kissing her breathless, in the moment, Mick found himself paralyzed by her obvious hesitation. She hadn’t been that way with him the times they’d met up over the past few weeks, so seeing her cut her gaze first to Paul and then Dayna and finally Jay, who’d come onto the deck after her, Mick didn’t move. Alice had taken a step or two toward him, but suddenly everyone was there on the deck, all of them shaking hands or hugging or being introduced, and the chance to kiss her had been lost.

  * * *

  So much for bothering with the lacy panties, Alice thought as she unpacked her bag into the dresser and hung up the dresses Jay had rolled for her in the closet. She and Mick had barely said more than a few words to each other, much less had any chance for him to get a glance at what she wore beneath her dress. Despite what she’d told Jay, she had been half hoping tonight would be the night they finally got down to it.

  “Oh, well,” she muttered. “Tomorrow is another day.”

  “Gone with the Wind?”

  Alice turned at the sound of Dayna’s voice. The other woman stood in the doorway to the bathroom between the rooms each of them was using. Alice laughed. “Something like that.”

  Dayna smiled. “So, I’m going to take a quick shower. Unless you need to get in here, first?”

  “Nope, I’m good.” Alice stretched a little and eyed the bed. She wasn’t even close to tired, and considering it was nearly two in the morning, that was saying something.

  When Dayna closed the bathroom door and the water started running, Alice quietly closed her dresser drawer. She paced for a moment or so. It didn’t seem likely that Dayna would try to come into Alice’s bedroom again, but just in case, Alice locked the door from her bedroom into the shared bath. She turned off her light. She slipped into the hall, listening for any sounds of other wakeful weekenders, but there was nothing but the soft bubble from Bernie’s fish tank in the living room. With her heart thumping so loud she’d have been incapable of hearing anything else anyway, Alice closed the door behind her and tiptoed into the living room.

  Someone had left a light on in the kitchen, and she prepared to make an excuse about needing a drink of water, but the words died before they ever escaped her lips at the sight of Mick standing at the counter. He turned when she came in. She didn’t imagine the light in his eyes at the sight of her.

  And then he was moving across the r