Half Girlfriend Read online

  ‘Trouble, brother, trouble,’ Shailesh said, after a minute.

  ‘But she kissed him,’ Ashu said.

  ‘Toys. Told you about rich people and their toys,’ Shailesh said.

  I ate my food. My friends further analysed the situation. In my heart I knew Riya didn’t see me as a toy. We had a connection. But my heart can be over-imaginative and stupid.

  ‘I’ll talk to her,’ I said.

  ‘What? Enough talking. Now do,’ Raman said.

  ‘Do what?’ I said.

  Raman shook his head. Everyone smiled.

  ‘Listen, Madhav, I don’t want to break your heart. But you do know such a girl is beyond you,’ Raman said.

  ‘What do you mean?’ I said, putting my fork down on the table.

  ‘Look at them. Look at you. You forgot your aukaat or what?’

  Raman had spoken in a flat, controlled voice. However, it hurt. It hurt like he had taken his blunt fork and jabbed it into my chest. It hurt because he didn’t think I deserved Riya. It hurt because he had spoken the truth.

  ‘Why does she hang out with me all the time?’ I said. ‘She can have all the rich friends she wants. In fact, she does.’

  ‘You are the new exotic creature in her life. She’s bored with everything else,’ Raman said.

  ‘Are you always this pessimistic?’ Ashu said. Only the fat kid supported me. I transferred the gulab jamun from my plate on to his.

  ‘The statistical probability is low,’ Shailesh said, in his academic voice. ‘However, my friend Raman should know that love does happen between classes.’

  ‘If this is love, why is she avoiding a relationship?’ Raman said. He stood up to leave. He had finished his dinner and what he wanted to say.

  Ashu thanked me for the gulab jamun. ‘Raman has no experience with girls. You are doing well. Take it slow. Everything will be fine,’ he said.

  ‘What do you think, Shailesh?’ I said.

  Of the four of us, I trusted Shailesh’s judgement the most. He topped the class and was the most well-read. Of course, like us, he had little experience with women. He drank another glass of water.

  ‘Yes, don’t rush it. However, don’t stall it either,’ Shailesh said.

  ‘What does that mean?’ Ashu said on my behalf.

  ‘Keep it slow, but keep escalating,’ Raman said.

  ‘Escalating? What? How?’ I said.

  ‘What’s the clearest sign a girl likes you?’ Shailesh said.

  ‘She spends time with you?’ I said.

  ‘Wrong,’ Shailesh said and stood up as well.

  ‘So then?’ I said.

  ‘You know the answer. Now do it,’ Shailesh said and left.

  ‘What do you want to talk about?’ Riya said.

  She had worn a lemon-coloured chikan salwar-kameez to college that day. We sat under the big banyan tree in between classes. Her hair blew in all directions in the afternoon breeze.

  ‘Thanks for the party,’ I said.

  ‘You are welcome. Like I told you, it isn’t really my scene but my parents wanted to do it.’

  ‘Riya, that’s your world. It was me who didn’t fit in.’

  ‘I can fit in, but I can’t relate to it. I’d rather have a meaningful conversation over chai than catered sushi with plastic smiles.’

  ‘How’s Rohan? Sorry, Ro,’ I said.

  ‘He made quite an impression on you. He’s cool, no?’

  ‘See, you find him cool. That is your world,’ I said.

  ‘He’s over the top and a bit of a show-off. But at least Rohan’s fun. The rest are all boring businessmen who only talk money and property.’

  ‘Go have fun then,’ I said and looked away from her.

  She tugged at my elbow.

  ‘Anyway, forget the party. Eye contact, please.’

  Eyes squinting against the mid-morning sun, she draped her yellow dupatta around her face. She looked like a bunch of yellow flowers. I had to be firm. I ignored how cute she was, lest it weaken my resolve.

  ‘What did you want to talk about?’ she asked again.

  ‘The kiss,’ I said.

  Riya giggled. ‘I can’t believe I am the girl and you are the guy. The guy wants to talk about it.’

  ‘Very funny. Now can we discuss it?’

  ‘What about the kiss? You forced it on me.’

  Her answer stumped me. I didn’t know what to say.

  ‘I. . .I did it because. . .’ I fumbled for words.

  ‘Yes, why? Why did you do it, Mr Jha?’

  ‘Because I. . .I love you.’

  Riya burst out laughing. I didn’t like her laughter this time.

  ‘Can you please be serious? Your casual behaviour hurts me,’ I said.

  She composed herself and sat cross-legged under the tree.

  ‘Okay, fine, Madhav, I will be serious. I laughed because I don’t think you are in love with me.’

  ‘Oh, really? How do you know that?’

  ‘Have you been in love before?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘So how do you know it’s love?’

  Her confusing words left me tongue-tied.

  ‘How do you know it’s not?’ I said after half a minute.

  ‘I know it is not. We are both too young, inexperienced but curious. Sure, we like each other. But love? Please.’

  ‘Riya, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I would do anything for you. Anything,’ I said.

  Our eyes locked. For a few seconds, even the articulate Miss Riya Somani didn’t have words.

  ‘Madhav, you mean a lot to me too. But. . .’

  ‘But what?’

  ‘I am not sure if I want a relationship right now. With anyone.’

  How does one answer that? I had no idea.

  ‘I don’t mean that much to you then,’ I said.

  ‘We hang out all the time. Aren’t we almost a couple?’

  ‘So what’s wrong with the next step?’

  The bell rang for class. We stood up to leave.

  ‘What’s the next step, Madhav?’ she said, as we walked towards class.

  I scratched my head to think of an answer.

  ‘Become my girlfriend.’

  ‘Oh. And what does that involve? Getting physical?’

  ‘Maybe. That’s often part of it.’

  She smiled and shook her head in an all-knowing manner.

  We stopped as we reached our respective classrooms.

  ‘Please, Riya,’ I said. ‘Please be my girlfriend.’

  ‘Is this a proposal?’ she said.

  ‘If that’s how you see it.’

  ‘I’ll think about it.’

  ‘You’ll tell me after class?’

  She grabbed my shoulders and turned me towards my classroom.

  Riya didn’t come to college the next day. I briefed my friends-cum-relationship-experts about the proposal while eating lunch in the dining hall.

  Shailesh felt I had come across as desperate. Ashu thought I had handled it well.

  ‘Well, did she tell you her decision afterwards?’ Raman said.

  ‘No. And today she is absent,’ I said.

  ‘See? Desperate. She’s skipped college to avoid you,’ Shailesh said.

  ‘To avoid me?’

  Shailesh shrugged.

  ‘You better get an answer,’ Raman said.

  ‘You better do it with her,’ Shailesh said. Everyone fell silent.

  ‘Do what?’ I said. The boys guffawed.

  ‘You guys are sick.’

  ‘She’s using you. Time pass until a real guy comes along,’ Shailesh said, picking his teeth with a toothpick.

  ‘Ignore Shailesh. Find out why she’s absent. Message her,’ Ashu said.

  ‘Should I? She’s supposed to answer my question,’ I said.

  The boys didn’t answer either. I came to my room after lunch. I had a mobile phone now. Even though expensive, I would use it sometimes to call Riya.

  I composed a message. Did not see yo