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  “Okay.” I started to move back a little, and then changed my mind. I leaned forward and kissed him slowly. Whether I changed tonight or not, I was falling for Lucas…hard.

  I drew away and gave him a soft smile. I twisted around and removed my boots. When I turned back, he was a wolf.

  I nestled up against his side. Sleep seemed impossible when I knew what awaited me tonight. So I was surprised when darkness claimed me quickly.

  SIXTEEN

  When I woke up, it was early nightfall. Lucas was still sleeping when I crept out of the cavern and eased out from behind the waterfall. It was one of those weird nights where the moon was visible at the same time that the sun was. I’d always found the moon peaceful, but not tonight. Tonight it seemed ominous, a sign of change that I wasn’t sure I wanted to face.

  I glanced around. No sign existed of the wolves who’d been here earlier, but I had a feeling they were still around, guarding us. They knew what was supposed to happen tonight. It seemed to me that I should feel different. Instead I wondered what my senior year of high school was going to be like if I had a boyfriend at a university in another state. I was concerned with clothes and shoes and grades. Typical teenage stuff. I just didn’t know if I’d be typical anymore.

  I felt Lucas’s presence before I heard him or saw him. He came to stand beside me. He’d shifted back to human form. Even though he was still recovering from his wound, I felt strength emanating from him.

  “The others are still here, aren’t they?” I asked.

  “Yes. Devlin said the Keanes had left. Tonight wouldn’t be a good night for them to return. The first shift goes much easier if there are no interruptions, if we’re not distracted by other things.”

  I glanced at his side. He was wearing a T-shirt and I couldn’t see his bandages, but I knew they were there. “How are you feeling?”

  “Not bad for someone who got shot. I’ve gotten so used to shifting to heal wounds that I’m a little impatient that it hasn’t healed completely, but I’m going to be all right.”

  “He could have killed you.”

  “But he didn’t. And now it’s your survival we have to focus on.”

  My mouth went dry. I was almost as scared right now as I’d been this afternoon. “If you’re right about what’s going to happen, I guess after tonight I won’t be just a girl anymore.”

  He gave me a sad smile. “You never were, Kayla.”

  I nodded. “I know this probably sounds totally insane—and I know it’s not like we’re getting married—but I really feel grungy. I’d love to pretty myself up.”

  “A lot of the guys bring the girls here for their first transformation. There’s a box over there with a lot of girl stuff in it. I’ll show you. Then I have some things to prepare, too.”

  I found everything I needed in the cavern. I guessed that they were used to girls feeling like they had to be at their best when going through their first shift. There were little samples of everything, like you find in a hotel. Using the very edge of the waterfall where the water wasn’t so harsh, I shampooed and showered. I applied a lotion to my skin. I combed out my hair and finger-fluffed it until it dried. I left it loose, hanging past my shoulders. I had a brief moment of wondering what my fur would look like before shutting down the thought. I didn’t really want to contemplate the enormity of what was going to happen in a few hours.

  I bundled up my clothes, then dropped them near our sleeping bags. Arranged over some containers was a wrap that Lucas suggested I wear. It would provide me with cover without hampering my movements until I shifted. Then it would just fall away.

  It was white and silky and seemed appropriate for a first-time Shifter. I draped it around my shoulders. It had enough volume and folds that I didn’t have to clutch the opening to keep it closed. I guessed after thousands of years the Shifters had figured out what they needed for this moment.

  I walked back to the waterfall and stared at the rush of water. I didn’t have Lucas’s certainty that I was going to change. While I was afraid of what the transformation might be like, I was more terrified that if it didn’t occur, in spite of his reassurances, I’d lose Lucas.

  Lucas and I ate by moonlight. We sat on a black cape, similar to my white one. I assumed it was his and wondered why he wasn’t already wearing it. Apparently there were rituals involved here that I didn’t yet know about.

  Dinner was simple: just prepackaged sandwiches and protein bars. Lucas told me to eat plenty because I’d need my strength. Sipping my bottled water, I watched as the moon rose higher.

  “So after the first shift, I can change at will?” I asked, wanting to know as much as possible in case it did happen.

  Lucas was stuffing our trash into the front pocket of the backpack. He was all about not littering our environment. He glanced up at me. “Yeah.”

  “So, how do I do that?”

  “The first shift, you have no control over. Your body is going to do what it needs to do to teach itself to shift. When you’re ready to shift back to human form, just close your eyes and envision yourself as a human. Your body will take over.”

  “What if it doesn’t? What if I get stuck?”

  He grinned. “I’ve never heard of anyone getting stuck in one form. If you think you’re in trouble, just let me know.” He shifted away as though suddenly uncomfortable. “Just remember that I’ll be able to read all your thoughts…and you’ll be able to read mine.”

  “That’s how we’ll communicate?”

  “Yeah.”

  “This is going to be so freaking weird. Are you sure you don’t have me confused with someone else?”

  “I’m sure.”

  “So what time will all this happen? When will the moon be at its zenith?”

  “Sometime around midnight.”

  I nodded. “And what do you do?”

  “If you accept me—”

  “Wait, what do you mean if I accept you?”

  “You have to accept me as your mate.”

  “How do I do that?”

  He grinned again. “With a kiss.”

  I smiled back at him, then my nerves kicked in and I grew serious. “So this is a shifting and a mating ritual?”

  I thought he was blushing again. “It doesn’t go any further than a kiss…unless both parties want it to.”

  “Have you ever done it? I mean, as a wolf?”

  He laughed. It was a deep rich sound, the first time I’d ever heard him truly laugh. It made me feel good, made some of the tension inside me uncoil.

  “I can’t believe you asked me that,” he said.

  “What? You never even thought about it?”

  He gave me a wry grin. “No, I’ve never done it as a wolf.”

  “How about…you know. In human form.”

  He took my hand and shook his head. “Wolves mate for life.”

  I swallowed hard. “So you’ve been, like, waiting for me?”

  “My whole life.”

  No wonder Devlin had lost it. But I didn’t want to think about him or all the heavy stuff that Lucas might be dealing with. I needed to get through tonight so I could help him get through the baggage he’d picked up. My therapist was going to have a field day analyzing me when I got back from summer vacation.

  “So this silky thing we’re sitting on, you’ll wear it?”

  He nodded.

  “And you stay in human form until…?”

  “We shift together—or as close together as possible.”

  “And you tell me what to do?”

  He nodded again.

  I squeezed his hands. “Look, I know this is coming, but…I can’t just sit here and wait for it. Don’t take this wrong, but I need to walk around. And I need to be alone for a while to psych myself up.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay.” I should have felt relief that he didn’t argue. He needed to rest anyway. It was still a couple hours until the time for my transformation. I got up and started walking along the edge of