Her Sexiest Mistake Read online

  She looked into his face, rugged, rangy, tough, and yet kind. The kindest face she’d ever known. He gave and gave and gave, to his family, to his students, to anyone who was in need.

  Who gave to him?

  She sure as hell hadn’t, and the shame of that nearly choked her. “I’m not. Sleeping at night,” she added.

  His eyes opened again.

  Slowly she shook her head. “It’s my own fault. I screwed up with you so badly. I mean, for someone so determined to be careful, to do everything perfectly, could I have done worse?”

  He winced. “Mia—”

  “No, you’ve got to hear me out on this one. I was so busy keeping you in a certain area of my life—”

  “Which is to say the naked area.”

  Now it was her turn to wince. “Yeah, I sure did my best to keep you naked. To keep it just sex. I managed to do that for approximately five seconds.”

  That got his attention. He looked right at her, and she rushed to keep going, for once in her life to get it right. “You see, I always knew,” she said, her voice pitchy and uneven.

  “Knew what?”

  “That I loved you.” The words felt rusty in her mouth, assuring her that she had not said them enough. “I do love you,” she whispered. “So much.”

  His eyes darkened. “While those are very welcome words, I’ve learned love isn’t always enough.”

  “No. Not when one of us is holding back, trying to keep herself from sinking in too deep. But I’ve finally realized, I’m not drowning at all, because no matter how deep or hard I fall, you’re there with me.”

  He stared at her for a beat, then snagged her hips and tugged so that she fell over the top of him.

  She put her hands on his chest and smiled up into his face. “See? You broke my fall.”

  He let out a low laugh, shook his head as if to clear it. “Spell this out for me, Mia. What are you saying?”

  “I’m saying that maybe you’re not the only one who can make changes.”

  Though his eyes remained serious, his lips curved. “You’re going to stop folding your underwear?”

  “Okay, smart-ass. I’m trying to say something here.”

  “Then spit it out.”

  “I made you feel as if there wasn’t room in my life for you, but there is.” Sliding her fingers into his hair, she tightened her grip just a little, and kissed him. “I want to take the next step. I want to be with you, only you. And hold on to something, Ace, because here comes the biggie. I think I might someday actually want that whole white dress, white cake thing.”

  His eyes widened. His fingers tightened on her hips. No doubt he was leaving more flour stains on the Dolce & Gabbana, but she couldn’t care less. “You mean—”

  “I know you didn’t ask me, but since I’m doing everything upside down and ass backward, I thought it’d be fitting if I asked you.” The waterworks were threatening again, but she blinked them back. “Will you have me, Kevin? Through thick and thin and cookie dough parties? Through better or worse, or worse-est?”

  “Mia—”

  “Wait,” she said quickly, not wanting him to say no yet. “You’re probably having doubts that I mean all this, doubts that I could let go enough to love you as much as you love me. But I can, Kevin. I—”

  “Mia,” he said again, with such tenderness it blindsided her. He framed her face with his hands. “I don’t have any doubts. You just take my breath, is all.”

  She stared into his eyes and felt herself smile, at peace for the first time in…ever. Sliding down, she snuggled in close and pressed her face into his throat, breathing him in, holding him tight enough that their hearts beat in unison. “I don’t either anymore. Not a single one…”

  About the Author

  New York Times bestselling author Jill Shalvis has written over four dozen romance novels, including her acclaimed sexy contemporary series set in Lucky Harbor. The RITA Award–winner and 3-time National Readers Choice Award–winner makes her home in a small town in the Sierras. You can find Jill’s award-winning books wherever romances are sold and visit her website for a complete book list and daily blog detailing her city-girl-living-in-the-mountains adventures.

  You can learn more at:

  JillShalvis.com

  Twitter @jillshalvis

  Facebook.com/jillshalvis

  Aubrey is setting out to right old wrongs. But Ben doesn’t even know he’s on her list.

  Despite their troubled past, Lucky Harbor could be a hot, new beginning.

  Please turn this page for a preview of

  Once in A Lifetime.

  Chapter One

  The next morning, Ben walked out of Lucky Harbor’s deliciously warm bakery and into the icy morning. His breath crystallized in front of his face as he took a bite from his fresh bear claw.

  As close to heaven as he was going to get.

  He glanced back inside the big picture window to wave his thanks, but pastry chef Leah currently had her arms and lips entangled with her fiancé, who happened to be Ben’s cousin Jack.

  Jack looked to be pretty busy himself, with his tongue down Leah’s throat. Turning his back to the window, Ben watched the morning instead as he ate his bear claw. Tendrils of fog had slid in off the water, lingering in long, silvery fingers.

  After a few minutes, the bakery door opened behind him, and then Jack was standing at his side. He was in uniform for work, which meant that every woman driving down the street slowed down to get a look at him in his firefighter gear.

  “Why are you dressed?” Ben asked.

  “Because when I’m naked, I actually cause riots,” Jack said, sliding on his sunglasses.

  “You know what I mean.” Not too long ago, Jack had made the change from firefighting to Fire Marshall, and no longer suited up to respond to calls.

  Jack shrugged. “I’m working a shift today for Ian, who’s down with the flu.” He pulled his own breakfast choice out of a bakery bag.

  Ben took one look at the cheese croissant and shook his head. “Pussy breakfast.”

  Unperturbed by this, Jack stuffed it into his mouth. “You’re just still grumpy because a pretty lady tossed her drink in your face last night.”

  Ben didn’t react to this because Jack was watching him carefully, and Jack, unlike anyone else, could read Ben like a book. But yeah, Aubrey had nailed him—and not in a good way.

  Not that he wanted the sexy-as-hell blonde to nail him. Well, okay, maybe she’d occasionally done just that in a few of his late night fantasies, but that was it. Fantasy. Because the reality was that he and Aubrey wouldn’t mix well. He liked quiet, serene, calm.

  Aubrey didn’t know the meaning of any of those things. “It was an accident,” he finally said.

  “Oh, I know that,” Jack said. “Just checking to see if you know it too.”

  Ben looked at his watch. “Luke’s late.”

  The three of them had been tight since age twelve, when Ben’s mom, unable to take care of him any longer, had dropped him on her sister’s doorstep—Jack’s mom Dee Harper. Luke had lived next door. The three boys had spent their teen years terrorizing the neighborhood and giving Ben’s Aunt Dee lots of gray hair.

  “Luke’s not late,” Jack said. “He’s here. He’s in the flower shop trying to get into Ali’s back pocket. Guess that’s what you do when you’re engaged.”

  Ben didn’t say anything to this, and Jack blew out a breath. “Sorry.”

  Ben shook his head. “Been a long time.”

  “Yeah,” Jack said. “But some things never stop hurting.”

  Maybe not. But it really had been forever ago that Ben had been engaged, and then married. He and Hannah’d had a solid marriage.

  Until she’d died five years ago.

  Ben went after his second bear claw while Jack looked down at his vibrating phone. “Shit. I’ve gotta go. Tell Luke he’s an asshole.”

  “Will do.” When he was alone again, Ben washed down his breakfast with icy cold,