About That Kiss Read online

  wasn’t trying to take away your closure,” he said. “But God, Molly, you almost died. I had to—”

  “Be at my side,” she said. “That was all you had to do and all I ever needed.” She took a deep breath and lowered her voice. “Listen, you can’t protect me all the time, and no one expects you to. It’s the same with anyone in your life, okay? Kylie’s a big girl. She’d rather have you at her side while she fights her battles than have you fight them for her.”

  Shit. That actually made sense. Which meant she was right.

  She stepped closer and put her hand on his chest. “I need you to really hear this, Joe, and believe me. And then let it go. And then I need you to understand you’re doing the same thing all over again to Kylie and she’s not going to be as forgiving as your sister. See, I have to forgive you. We’re blood. I’m going to always love you whether I like it or not. But Kylie doesn’t have to forgive you at all. And if she doesn’t, and she dumps your sorry ass for real, I’m afraid you’re going to go back to . . .” She clamped her lips tight together, her eyes going suspiciously damp.

  “To what?” he asked softly.

  “To the man who doesn’t smile or laugh or let himself feel.”

  He closed his eyes. “Molly,” he breathed, and pulled her in for a hug. She held on tight, so damn tight that it was almost impossible to swallow the lump in his throat.

  She was right. He couldn’t protect her all the time and he had to accept that. Same with Kylie. And if he loved her—and damn, but he really did—he had to let her do this.

  I love her?

  Holy shit. He actually had to drop his ass to his couch because his legs got wobbly. Pulling out his phone, he texted the guys that there was going to be a change of plans. Kylie would go in first and talk to Kevin and get her damn closure if it killed him.

  And it might.

  They’d have her back, they’d make sure she was safe, and when she was satisfied by whatever answers she could get, they’d be there to finish it if needed and to drag Kevin’s ass to jail. “I’ve got to go,” he said.

  Molly smiled. “Tell her hi for me.”

  Joe drove through the early morning wondering why the hell it’d taken him so long to realize that this was the only way it could go down.

  And then there was the bigger epiphany of the night, the one he was trying damn hard not to dwell on.

  He loved Kylie, a fact far more terrifying than any job he’d ever taken on.

  He parked in front of Kylie’s place. The lights were no longer on. It was four thirty in the morning. She was undoubtedly asleep. He hated to wake her, but this couldn’t wait. There wasn’t much time before they’d meet up with the team.

  But she didn’t answer the door. Or her phone. And when he helped himself and broke in, he just about stopped breathing.

  She wasn’t home.

  He knew exactly where she’d gone. And why. He’d cut her out and now she was doing the same to him. He tried calling her again. Still no answer.

  Joe was trained to handle himself in any situation, but nothing had prepared him for this moment. For knowing she’d gone off on her own—because of him.

  He should never have tried to shield her. He should’ve just gone with her and trusted she could handle whatever they’d found, together.

  Worse, he realized something else—that as much as he couldn’t stand the thought of losing her, he’d lost her anyway by not trusting her. In his life, he tried really hard not to do anything stupid, but he’d definitely failed there. People tended to make assumptions based on words, but in Joe’s experience, people rarely said what they really meant. So he didn’t go by words. He went by steady, consistent actions.

  And all of Kylie’s actions told him she loved him too.

  Unfortunately, his actions hadn’t told her the same thing in return. Which really did make him an ass. His chest hurt, no doubt from understanding that this was how his life was going to feel without Kylie in it.

  Empty.

  He ran to his truck, calling Archer and the guys to move everything up to right this minute. He called the police. He called everyone and hoped he wasn’t too late.

  Chapter 30

  #SnapOutOfIt

  Kylie sat at her mom’s small kitchen table, drinking hot chocolate with little tiny marshmallows. When she’d been young, she’d had to drag a chair over from the table to climb up onto her grandpa’s cabinets to reach the box of prepackaged powder. He’d kept it hidden from her because she’d had no self-control, loving how she always felt like Wonder Woman when all the sugar hit her system.

  But her mom didn’t hide the stuff and Kylie was on her third cup.

  Wonder Woman still hadn’t shown up.

  But an entire volume of doubts had. When push had come to shove and Joe believed he’d had a viable suspect, he’d planned to handle it without her. He would’ve left her behind, when only days ago he’d promised to never leave her behind. “Men suck,” she said.

  “Yeah, they do.” Her mom came to sit at the table with her, carrying her own cup of hot chocolate. Or more accurately, rum with a dab of hot chocolate. “Men always suck. You sure you don’t need a kick?” She held up a flask.

  “I’m sure,” Kylie said. Her mom had a lifelong history with men sucking. Not that the woman had ever refrained from men, of course. In the old days, she’d visit Kylie at her grandpa’s, dote on her for a while, or at least until another man came along, and then poof, she’d be gone.

  Logically, Kylie knew she was angry at Joe because he was giving her bad flashbacks to her past. To when her mom hadn’t ever put any weight into who Kylie was, wanting so much more from her life than to be a mom in the first place.

  It’d been excusable when her mom had been a very young teen mom, but the pattern had been set and kept. She’d always chosen men over her daughter.

  And in turn, she’d chosen men who chose work over her.

  Maybe Kylie was overreacting. Okay, so she was definitely overreacting. All Joe was trying to do was keep her safe. She got that. She really did. But emotions like hurt and frustration didn’t respond to common sense. The bottom line was that this wasn’t a simple misunderstanding between them. They saw the world differently. A man like Joe would always be able to set her aside for something else. And she’d had enough of that for a lifetime. She deserved better. She needed to move on and get it for herself.

  The funny—and sad—thing was, out of all the ways she’d thought their relationship would come to an end, this hadn’t even been in the realm of possibilities, her realizing that she loved him and also that he wasn’t the One for her. With her chest far too tight, she downed the rest of her hot chocolate, beginning to rethink her no-rum stance.

  “So are you ever going to tell me what brings you here at . . .” Her mom glanced at the clock on the range. “Four thirty-eight in the morning? I’m not buying that it’s because you got hurt by some guy. You’ve never been all that invested in the opposite sex, certainly not enough to let one get to you.”

  Ha. That was a good one. But she shoved that deep because that had nothing to do with why she was here. The thing was, she wasn’t stupid. No matter that Joe didn’t trust her to use her brain, she knew better than to go after Kevin on her own. She’d never do that.

  But she wanted answers and her mom might be the one who could give them to her. “It’s complicated,” she started.

  Her mom smiled. “Kylie, honey, everything with you is.”

  Kylie sighed and told herself not to get mad. She was here for answers, not a fight. And anyway, she supposed she could be a little complicated.

  “It’s just that you seem . . . sad.” Her mom’s eyes were surprisingly free of cynicism. “Are you?” she asked. “Sad?”

  Well, that was one word for what Kylie felt. Devastated was another. “Do you remember Kevin Baker?” she asked.

  Her mom scrunched up her forehead. “Kevin . . . yeah, sure. He was the one who was a good cook, right? Always mak