Dark Flame Page 53


I take a deep breath and rest my head in my hands, telling myself to get up, get back out there, make an attempt at small talk, then find an excuse to leave. Rubbing my eyes and running my fingers through my hair and over my clothes, just about to do exactly that when Ava comes in and says, “Oh good, I’ve been hoping for a moment alone with you.”

I press my lips together, fighting the overwhelming urge to rush toward her and punch out all her chakras, if for no other reason than to see, once and for all, just whose side she’s really on. But I don’t. I don’t do a thing. Instead, I stay right where I am and wait for her to begin.

“You know, you’re right about me.” She nods, leaning against Romy’s dresser, legs crossed at the ankles, though her arms remain open and loose. “I did run off with the elixir. And I did leave Damen exposed and defenseless. There’s just no getting around it.”

I gaze at her, my heart beating frantically, even though I already knew it, even though Damen explained it to me, it’s a whole other experience to hear her actually admit it.

“But before you rush to conclusions, I’m afraid there’s a little more to it than that. Despite what you may think, I was never in cahoots with Roman. I wasn’t partnered with him, friendly with him, or working with him in any way, shape, or form. He came by for a reading once, yes, way back when I first started. And, to be honest, his energy was so off—so disconcerting—I gave him a silent blessing and sent him on his way. But the reason I did what I did—the reason I failed to look after Damen, well, it’s complicated—”

“I’ll bet.” I lift my brow and shake my head. I’ve no intention of cutting her any slack or letting her dance around it with some overly complex explanation.

She nods, determined to take it in stride. True to her usual self, she’s unfazed by my outburst. “At first, I admit, I got a little caught up in all the possibilities of Summerland, of all the glorious gifts that it offered. You have to understand I’ve been out on my own for so long, supporting myself and working hard for everything that I have with no help from anyone, and more often than not, just barely scraping by—”

“Are you seriously expecting me to feel sorry for you? Because if so—save it. Seriously. It won’t work.” I shake my head and roll my eyes.

“Just trying to give you a little background.” She shrugs, clasping her hands before her and flexing her fingers. “It’s not a bid for sympathy, believe me. If nothing else, I think I’ve learned an important lesson in taking responsibility for my own life. I’m just trying to explain my initial reaction to Summerland, how enthralled I was by the ability to just manifest any material thing I could want. And I know I went a little overboard, and I know how much it annoyed you. But, after a while, I realized I could build myself a mansion full of treasures in Summerland, but it wouldn’t make me any happier—either there or on the earth plane. And that’s when I decided to go a little deeper, try to improve myself in ways I’d never truly attempted before. Sure, I had my sacred space and my meditations, but once I set my sights on gaining access to the Great Halls of Learning, well, that’s when I was forced to walk all that talk I’d been spouting for years. And so—I gave up everything else and concentrated solely on that, and it wasn’t long before I was in, and I never looked back.”

I look at her, my eyes narrowed to slits, and all I can think is: Well, bravo for you, Ava, bravo for you.

“I know what you are, Ever. Damen too. And while I don’t necessarily agree with it, it’s not my place to interfere.”

“Is that why you tried to have him killed? Is that how you deal with things you don’t approve of? Sounds like interfering to me.” I glare at her, digging my toe into the carpet as deep as it’ll go.

She shakes her head, her voice calm, gaze fixed on mine. “I didn’t know any of this when I left Damen that day. Back then, I truly believed that everything would be reversed—just as you believed too. You’d go back in time, Damen would go back as well, and while I wasn’t sure of just what the elixir was, I had my suspicions, had every intention of drinking it too—but then, for some reason, just when I was about to—I stopped. I just couldn’t go through with it. I guess the enormity of it got to me—the enormity of living forever.” She looks at me. “That’s pretty serious stuff—don’t you think?”

I shrug. Shrug and roll my eyes. So far she hasn’t said a thing to change my mind about her, and I’m still not convinced she didn’t drink it, for that matter.

“So, in the end, I tossed it, made the portal to Summerland, and started searching for answers—for peace.”

“And did you find any?” I ask, the tone in my voice making it clear that I don’t really care either way.

“Yes.” She smiles. “My peace is in knowing that we’ve all got our own journey—our own destiny to fulfill. And now, I finally know mine.” I look at her, seeing the way her face lights up when she adds, “I’m here to use my gifts to help those who need it, to live without fear, to trust that I’ll always have enough to get by, and to finish raising the twins in a way I failed to manage before.” She gives me a look, a look like she wants to reach out and hug me, but luckily she settles for running her hand through her hair and staying right where she is. “I’m sorry about what happened, Ever. I never thought it would end up like this. And while I may not approve of what you and Damen are, it’s really not my place to judge. You’ve got your own journey to walk.”

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