“And then I moved to Lex and Cade’s and worked. For a long time, years, I lived in this middle place. Not really feeling anything because I was afraid to. I didn’t date, didn’t go out with friends, didn’t laugh or let anyone hug me. I felt a few things from time to time—fear, loneliness and rage.”

The unshed tears in his eyes made her swallow, hard.

“Oh, honey, I wish I could have been there for you sooner. What made you turn it around?”

Tegan told him about the dreams, about how she felt Lucas himself told her to move on and start living again. And about his warning.

“Wow. Well, there are times when I feel threatened by his memory, you know? He’s this perfect love for you. He was a wolf too. You had different bonds, older, purer.

Sometimes when you talk about him your face gets dreamy. But I’m glad you had him.

And I’m glad he found a way to get to you, to tell you to let go.”

“He was very special. But so are you. He’s this beautiful part of my past but you’re my future, Ben. You’re the reason I live every day. Will you tell me about her? The one who hurt you so much?”

He told her the story of the woman and how he’d caught her cheating. Of how he’d had dreams of forever and the way this Sarah bitch had dashed them and hurt him so deeply he’d never trusted again.

“She needs a smackdown. Does she still live around here?”

Ben laughed and kissed her quickly. “While the thought of you kicking her ass is enticing, she’s not worth it. She married and lives in Olympia, or she did the last I heard six or so years ago.”

“Well, the offer is open. That pisses me off. How could any woman have you and look for anything else?”

He sighed and pulled her close. “I was different then. I have more to give now. I realize what the cost is to not put all my energy into a relationship. We didn’t start off very easily, Tegan but I’m committed to you and to us totally. I want you to know that.”

“I feel that.” She writhed against him as he swept her beneath his body. “Oh, I feel thattoo. Why don’t you show me what you got, old guy.”

Chapter Thirteen

Tegan returned from the firing range and then took a run to check the perimeter at the start of her shift. The air was crisp and clean as she trotted through the trees, her nose to the air every few feet when she wasn’t sniffing the ground.

Something wasn’t right. Outsiders had been there. Watching.

There wasn’t anyone around then. The scent was cold. Whoever it was had been very good and it took her an hour of very intense investigation before she found the scent on a bent back fern frond. Not human, wolf and not Cascadia.

After she’d come back, Ben had arrived and was eating breakfast with her brothers.

Dave followed Tegan in along with some of the other wolves from her shift. They’d noted her tension and knew something was up.

As did Lex and then Ben when they looked up to see her face.

“What?” Lex didn’t say anything else. She loved that he trusted her so much he didn’t need to, knew she’d tell him what he needed to know.

“Wolves were here. Probably after the last perimeter check.” She looked to Megan who’d been drinking some juice before she went to sleep. She didn’t want her sister to think she blamed her. “Two of them. Not Cascadia. I didn’t recognize the scent at all.

Which means it can’t be any of the west coast Packs or National since I’ve scented members from those.”

She explained the rest as she sat. Nina put a plate full of food before her and Tegan tucked in. The change took a lot of physical energy, she needed the fuel.

“We expected this. It was far enough from the house they couldn’t have used a sniper rifle. But you know, anti-tank missiles are still a possibility.”

Ben choked on his breakfast. “These f**ks have anti-tank missiles? Jesus God, Tegan, I’m going to get an ulcer for sure.”

Tegan held back a smile as she patted his back. “Honey, they’re the mob. Do you think they have ethics? They’ve never used anything like an anti-tank missile but we did find RPGs at their headquarters back when we first busted Pellini. That’s Lex being, well, Lex. He has to think of all the possibilities including dirty bombs and suitcase nukes. It’s his special talent.”

Nina snorted and Lex just shrugged and continued eating.

“I’d wager it’s Pellini’s people keeping an eye on us as the time for the NC approaches. He’s not going to move here. He doesn’t have to. He’ll wait to see if he can get his person into the National Mediator position. He’s a thug but he’s not stupid. He’ll try and do this with the veneer of following our laws. If that doesn’t work, we’ll all be on the alert because he’ll be three times as dangerous as he was before. For now, I think we continue to stay watchful and I’ll step up the patrols of the road. Nina just hooked us up with a really good camera system along the entrance feeder roads and paths to the house,” Lex explained and winked at his wife.

“Small cameras hooked to a wireless system. It won’t be ready to go online until later on today. I planned to run tests tonight to see how the infrared works. Guess I was a day late.”

Cade patted Nina’s arm. “You can’t do everything, Nina. It’s fine. We’ll get it up and running on schedule. We can’t skimp here. Lex is right, I don’t think we’re in any danger just now.”