I ducked behind a wall before he saw me, and I took a deep breath, drawing in as much of my energy as possible and pushing it down until he couldn’t sense me. By suppressing my power, I could hide it from him and ultimately hide myself from him. I couldn’t have him following me.

I kept my head low and my hair over my face as I pushed my way through the crowd and ducked out the front door. I got in my car and I was gone.

Alone.

21

I WAS NUMB AS I DROVE BACK TO NANA’S WITH NO intent to stay. I entered the house as quietly as I could and went straight to the guest room. With my duffel bag mostly still packed from the move, I hurriedly shoved a few more things into it before heading back out to my car. I drove somewhere I knew no one would find me, to the north side of town, to a park I’d been to with my parents a few times when I was little. It would be empty in the middle of winter and after dark, and I could avoid any contact with anyone, especially humans. I parked my car in the lot of an empty grocery store where it would be safe, and I walked beneath the lightly falling snow and lonely streetlights. A couple of cars passed me, and that was it for company. I relished the solitude and didn’t care that it was cold. When I got to the park, I trudged to its center and found a wrought-iron bench beneath a snow-covered tree and a single lamppost. I plopped down and immediately began to cry.

“This is a surprise,” said a voice to my side.

I jerked, startled, and looked up to see Cadan standing next to me. I wiped my face with my sleeve and made a very unladylike sniffle. I peeked at him and saw that he was staring at me with his head tilted curiously. “What do you want?”

“Did you even have a plan when you ran off?” he asked. “Where are you going? Do you even have a place to go?”

I snarled and wiped at the fresh tears on my face before they froze solid on my skin. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It’s no mystery that you’re very upset,” he said quietly as he sat beside me. “And your Guardian’s presence is nowhere to be felt. That is not a good sign.”

“Well, it’s nothing,” I snapped, and turned my gaze to the ground. “And you can go away now.”

“I don’t think so.”

“That was an order. I wasn’t asking for your opinion.”

“That doesn’t work on me, love. I’m not your Guardian.”

“Thank God for that.”

I expected a sharp retort, but he just looked at me. “I didn’t come here to fight with you,” he said.

“And I didn’t come here hoping to see you.”

He gave me a patient look. He seemed to tell by my hostility that I wasn’t in the mood for his jokes. At least he was smart. “I’m sorry, Ellie. I know what happened.”

I turned on him, snarling. “You don’t know shit.”

He narrowed his eyes, and fire flashed within them. “Don’t talk to me like I’m an idiot.”

The harshness in his voice surprised me. I didn’t expect him to say anything like that. Perhaps I deserved it. My gut twisted in a rage at the thought of the demonic reapers gloating behind my back. “Come to rub it in then?”

“I’m not your enemy, Ellie.”

“Aren’t you?”

He was silent.

I ground my teeth. Part of me wanted to fight him for the sake of fighting, but it’d do nothing to get me my revenge. “Why are you really here, then, if you already know what’s made me so upset? Do you want to tell me how sorry you are, or do you have another present from Bastian?”

He flinched and his gaze faltered. “I had nothing to do with that. I didn’t even know about it. If I had known what was going to happen, I would have done something to prevent it. I’m trying to help you.”

“You have nothing to do with everything, don’t you?” I snapped callously.

“I’m not going to take any of your crap, you know.”

I looked over at him, my mouth parting in shock. He had the nerve to talk to me like that?

His eyes were bright and gleaming, honest. “Your guard dog might be okay with getting bossed around and talked down to—”

“I don’t talk down to Will.”

“Oh?” He put his arms up on the back of the bench. “You sure about that?”

I opened my mouth to retort, but I had nothing to say.

“I’m sorry,” Cadan said.

I sighed. I had no right to be upset with him, since he was right, after all. “It’s fine. It’s all my fault anyway.”

“No, it’s not. The blame belongs to those who want to destroy this world and everyone in it.”

“I’ve managed to make Will hate me,” I grumbled. “I’m sure my grandmother thinks I’m a delinquent. Lauren’s petrified of me, and Nathaniel thinks I’m going to snap and kill them all … which I probably will.”

“Nah,” he said. “You’re not crazy.”

I huffed. “You haven’t seen me at my worst.”

“I’d still admire you for exactly what you are.”

“Don’t speak too soon.”

He smiled. “We all have our imperfections.”

“Most people’s imperfections don’t involve going berserk and trying to kill the people they love.”

He was quiet for a moment. “You have a lot more to deal with than most people. Nobody is like you. No one else is what you are, or has ever been what you are. You’re changing, trying to adapt to this world.”