Thirty-Three and a Half Shenanigans Page 17


“How bad was it?”

“My indigestion? Pretty bad.”

I laughed. “Not your indigestion, although I sympathize. The books. How were the books?”

“Way better than I expected.”

“So Violet didn’t try to cheat me?”

“With the nursery’s money? No. With everything else in your life . . . well, that’s another story. I still think you should switch over to accounting software, though.”

I let out a sigh of relief, feeling better until she glanced down at the food and up at my empty fork. “You better eat up while it’s still warm.” I noticed she wasn’t exactly pulling out any utensils of her own, but there was no polite way to say so.

Holding my breath, I took a bite and nearly gagged. I was wrong. It was worse than it looked.

“What do you think? I made it last night when I couldn’t sleep. I saw it on Chopped.”

“Uh . . . Neely Kate, isn’t that the show where they make dishes out of weird food combinations? They don’t have actual recipes.”

Her eyes lit up. “That’s the challenge! To make something so unique without a recipe. When I saw this, I decided to try it. I made it while I was going over the ledger last night.”

“Did Ronnie like it?”

She waved her hand, and I noticed her nails were painted green with red polka dots. “Please. That man wouldn’t know fine food if it jumped out of the lake and into his fishing boat on a gold plate. I made it for you.”

I tried another bite and began to choke. “Me?”

Neely Kate pulled a bottle of water out of her purse and handed it to me. “You’re the only one who appreciates my cooking.” She pursed her lips together. “I was sure Mason would, but he never seems to be around when I have gourmet meals with me.”

I took a drink, trying to figure a way out of eating the glop in front of me. I decided to use Mason’s trick. “This is delicious, but Mason and I had a late breakfast at the Big Biscuit.” Then I told her about Skeeter’s comment to Mason and the vision I’d forced of Christmas.

“Aw . . .” she gushed. “You two are so cute.”

A smile spread across my face.

“Do you really think you’re done with Skeeter?”

“If I was him, I wouldn’t trust the girlfriend of the Assistant DA. I just hope he won’t go after Mason.”

“I suspect Mason’s right. Skeeter’s a pretty smart guy, and it would look suspicious if something happened to the Assistant DA right after he got his big promo in the world of crime.” She put her fork down. “Speakin’ of questionable characters, I’ve got a favor to ask you.”

My eyebrows rose in surprise. “What is it?”

“You know how I was telling you about my missing cousin?”

“Dolly Parton?”

“Yeah.” She shifted on the seat. “She still hasn’t called my aunt, so she asked me to go out to her boyfriend Billy Jack’s trailer to check on her.”

I frowned. “So what’s the favor?”

“I was hopin’ you’d take me. My car’s been acting up, and her boyfriend lives down by Pickle Junction. I’m afraid I’ll break down. Do you have time?”

I looked at the gourmet mess on my desk. “Sure. I’m supposed to meet Joe at two at the nursery.” I glanced up at the clock. “That’s plenty of time to drive down to the Pickle Junction area and come back.”

Neely Kate threw her arms around me and pulled me into a hug. “You’re the best.”

Something was up. “Why are you gettin’ so excited over this?”

She gave me a perturbed look. “Because my aunt keeps calling, and she’s gonna get me into trouble at work.”

“So why don’t you turn your phone to silent?”

“And miss her calls? I’d get into even more trouble. I snuck away early and figured I could take a long lunch break so we could drive down there, find her in his trailer while they’re on some love fest, and tell her to call her momma.”

I hopped up and grabbed my coat. I suspected there was more to this story than she was telling me, but if it got me out of eating tofu chipotle burgers, I was game.

As I headed for the door, she called after me. “Wait! You didn’t try the peppermint Brussels sprouts muffins!”

I hurried out the door, pretending I didn’t hear her.

Chapter Six

“So why doesn’t your aunt go out to Billy Jack’s herself to see if Dolly Parton is out there?” We were almost to Pickle Junction, and I couldn’t help thinking we were about to hop into a hornet’s nest.

“Well . . . she can’t on account of the squirrel jerky incident.” Neely Kate tried to hide her cringe, but she wasn’t fooling me.

I blinked. “Do I want to know about the squirrel jerky incident?”

“No.” She pointed up ahead. “See that mailbox shaped like an armadillo? Turn there.”

I slowed down and cast a suspicious glance at her. “Why did you really invite me along on this mission?”

“I already told you.”

The road next to the battered metal armadillo had seen better days, but it was less beat up than the faded metal box. The once-red paint had faded to a pale pink, and someone had tried to attach what looked like plastic tusks to its face. There were two dents on its back—one on the front and the other on the back—that made the raised middle part look like a camel’s hump.

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