The Rosie Effect Page 47


Instead I took the opportunity to explore a lie by a third party. ‘When Gene said I had dog faeces on my shoe, did you believe him?’

‘Of course not. He dragged you outside to tell you not to get in my face in the kitchen. Or to give you the flower to give to me. Right?’

‘The first one. I purchased the flower independently.’ I would of course have been fooled had I been in Rosie’s position, but I was not surprised that she had detected Gene’s lie.

‘Do you think Gene knew that he had failed to deceive you?’ I asked.

‘I’d think so. It’s not like I don’t know the two of you.’

‘So why did he bother inventing a lie that no one would believe and that made no difference to anyone’s feelings?’

‘Just trying to be nice,’ she said. ‘I guess I appreciated the effort.’

Social protocols. Unfathomable.

It was my turn to deliver a surprise. I walked inside. Gene was back and he had helped himself to some of the surplus champagne in the refrigerator.

I returned to the balcony and pulled Rosie’s mother’s ring from my pocket. I took Rosie’s hand and put it on her finger, as I had done with another ring on this date a year earlier. In keeping with tradition, I put it on the same finger: the theory is that the eternity ring symbolically prevents the removal of the wedding ring. This seemed to be consistent with Phil’s intent.

It took Rosie a few seconds to recognise the ring and begin crying, and in that time Gene had thrown the full box of confetti over us with one hand and taken multiple photographs with the other.

18

A communal meal was scheduled for Tuesday evening. I reminded Rosie in the morning as I suspected her unreliability at keeping appointments had been exacerbated by pregnancy.

‘Don’t you forget,’ she said. ‘I’ve got the sonogram booked today.’

Problems had accumulated. I had made a list of eight critical items.

1. The Gene Relocation Problem. Obviously Gene needed to participate in this discussion.

2. The Banned Substances List. I had left it on Rosie’s desk, but she had not indicated her formal approval.

3. Rosie’s problem with leave from the medical program. This needed to be resolved as quickly as possible in the interests of certainty.

4. An exercise regimen for Rosie, outstanding after the failure of the swimming program.

5. Rosie’s thesis, behind schedule and in danger of interfering with other activities.

6. The Gene and Claudia Marriage Problem. I had made no progress and needed Rosie’s help.

7. The Carl and Gene Issue. Gene needed to talk to Carl.

8. Direct action on Rosie’s stress. Yoga and meditation are widely recognised as promoting relaxation.

Just making the list gave me a feeling of significant progress. I gave printed copies to Gene and Rosie as they sat down to dinner—wild-caught prawns followed by low-mercury grilled fish with a salad featuring the absence of alfalfa shoots.

Rosie’s reaction was not positive.

‘Fuck, Don. I’ve got two weeks to finish my thesis. I don’t need all this.’

There was silence for approximately twenty seconds.

‘Looking at this list,’ Gene said, ‘it seems like I’ve been contributing to Item 8. I’ve been so occupied with young Carl’s difficulties that I’ve been inconsiderate of you. I didn’t realise you were under so much pressure with the thesis.’

‘What do you think I’ve been doing in my study all the time? Why do you think I have no life? Don didn’t tell you I was behind?’ The words were aggressive, but I recognised a conciliatory tone.

‘Not really, no. It seems you and Don have got a lot to talk about, with leave and exercise and banned substances. I’ll grab a burger and start looking for somewhere to live tomorrow.’

Rosie had what she wanted, but inexplicably refused it.

‘No, no, sorry. Have dinner with us. We’ll talk about the food and exercise stuff some other time.’

‘We need to discuss it now,’ I said.

‘It can wait,’ said Rosie. ‘Tell us about Carl, Gene.’

‘He blames me for the split.’

‘If you could have your time again?’ said Rosie.

‘I wouldn’t change it for Claudia. But if I’d known how it would affect Carl…’

‘Unfortunately, the past is not changeable,’ I said, wanting to bring the conversation back to practical solutions.

‘Acknowledging your regret may help,’ said Rosie.

‘I doubt it’ll be enough for Carl,’ said Gene.

At least we had addressed, if not resolved, one item on the agenda. I made a point of checking it off on both of their copies.

We made no further progress with the list. Rosie produced a large envelope from her bag and gave it to Gene. ‘This is what I did this afternoon.’

Gene pulled a sheet from the envelope and passed it immediately to me. It was a sonogram picture, presumably of Bud. To a non-expert, it was indistinguishable from the pictures in The Book, which I was very familiar with. It was less clear than the sketch I had added to the Week 12 tile five days earlier. I passed it back to Rosie.

‘I guess you’ve seen it already,’ said Gene.

‘No, he hasn’t,’ said Rosie. She turned to me. ‘Where were you at 2.00 p.m. today?’

‘In my office, reviewing a research protocol for Simon Lefebvre. Is there a problem?’

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