connection."

"She's the only one who sees past this."

"Past what?"

She thought about that one for a moment. "What's the first thing you think when you see me, Mr. Bolitar?"

"I don't know."

"People like to stare," she said.

"Hard to blame them, don't you think?" Myron said. "I mean, the^way you dress and stuff."

She smiled. "I'd rather see shock on their faces than pity," she said. "And I'd rather they see brazen or outrageous than shrinking or scared or sad. Do you understand?"

"I think so."

"I'm not standing alone in the corner anymore. I've done enough of that."

Myron, unsure what to say, settled for a nod.

"When I was nineteen, I started wrestling professionally. And of course I was cast as a villain. I sneered. I made faces. I cheated. I hit opponents when they weren't looking. It was all an act, of course. But that was my job."

Myron sat back and listened.

"One night I was scheduled to fight Esperanza-Little Pocahontas, I should say. It was the first time we'd met. She was already the most beloved wrestler on the circuit. Cute and pretty and small and all the things... all the things that I'm not. Anyway, we were performing in some high school gym outside Scranton. The script was the usual. A back-and-forth match. Esperanza winning with her skill. Me cheating. Twice I was supposed to nearly have her pinned when the crowd would go wild and she'd start stamping her foot, like the cheers were giving her strength, and then everyone would start clapping in unison with her stomps. You know how it works, right?"

Myron nodded.

"She was supposed to pin me with a backflip at the fifteen-minute mark. We executed it perfectly. Then as she was raising her hands in victory, I was supposed to sneak up on her and whack her in the back with a metal chair. Again it went perfectly. She collapsed to the canvas. The crowd gasped. I, the Human Volcano-that's what I was called then-raised my hands in victory. They started booing and throwing things. I sneered. The announcers acted all concerned for poor Little Pocahontas. They brought out the stretcher. Again you've seen the same act a million times on cable."

He nodded again.

"So there was another match or two, and then the crowd was ushered out. I decided not to change until I got back to the motel. I left for the bus a few minutes before the other girls. It was dark, of course. Nearly midnight. But some of the spectators were still out there. They confronted me. There must have been twenty of them. They started shouting at me. I decided to play back. I did my ring sneer and flexed"-her voice caught-"and that was when a rock hit me square in the mouth."

Myron kept perfectly still.

"I started bleeding. Then another rock hit me in the shoulder. I couldn't believe what was happening. I tried to head back inside, but they circled around me. I didn't know what to do. They started moving in closer. I ducked down. Someone hit me over the head with a beer bottle. My knees hit the pavement. Then someone kicked me in the stomach and someone else pulled my hair."

She stopped. Her eyes blinked a few times and she looked up and away. Myron thought about reaching out to her, but he didn't. Later he'd wonder why.

"And that's when Esperanza stepped in," Big Cyndi said after a few moments had passed. "She jumped over someone in the crowd and landed right on me. The morons thought she was there to help beat me up. But she just wanted to put herself between me and the blows. She told them to stop. But they wouldn't listen. One of them pulled her away so they could keep beating me. I felt another kick. Someone yanked my hair so hard my neck snapped back. I really thought they were going to kill me."

Big Cyndi stopped again and took a deep breath. Myron stayed where he was and waited.

"You know what Esperanza did then?" she asked.

He shook his head.

"She announced that we were going to be tag team partners. Just like that. She shouted that after she'd been taken off on the stretcher, I'd visited her and we realized that we were actually long-lost sisters. The Human Volcano was now going to be called Big Chief Mama and we were going to be partners and friends. Some of the spectators backed off then. Others looked wary. It's a trap!' they warned her. 'The Human