I suspect I know why, and that just won’t do.

Leaning forward, I place my hands on the armrests of his chair and bend in toward him. His eyes immediately fall to my lips as they get closer to his, and I briefly see his eyes go warm before our mouths press together. I kiss him softly at first, but then slide my tongue in against his in a bold display of seduction.

Pulling my mouth away, I take both his hands in mine and pull him up from the chair. He stands hesitantly, his eyes leery and confused. I turn and walk from the office, tugging what I think is a reluctant Beck behind me.

Right-hand turn, and then to the end of the hallway, where I enter our bedroom.

The minute we cross the threshold, I turn and walk into Beck’s space. I loop my arms around his neck, one hand to the back of his head, and I pull him back down to me for another kiss. He doesn’t hesitate and this emboldens me. I make the kiss deep and wet and I moan my need into his mouth.

But I need more. I step in closer, press my body into his, and feel him growing hard against me. Even as Beck groans from the contact, his hands are at my shoulders pushing me back.

When I open my eyes, he’s staring back at me with wariness. “Are you hungry? Want to go out and get some dinner?”

“No,” I say as I drop my hand down to his crotch and palm his erection. And thank God he has an erection. I think I would curl into myself and die if he wasn’t turned on by me. “I want you to fuck me.”

“Sela,” Beck says in a patronizing tone that I know he just can’t help, and his hand comes to cover mine. “There’s no rush—”

“But there is,” I say, squeezing him. “We may have all our secrets out on the table, but there’s still something standing in our way. We cannot let what JT did to me come between us.”

“It won’t,” he assures me quickly. “But things are raw right now. I want you to be comfortable—”

“Are you grossed out about what he did?” I butt in.

“What?” he exclaims.

“Does it turn you off…knowing what he did to me?”

“God no,” he practically barks at me with agitation. “But this complicates things a bit. I don’t know how you feel and—”

“Don’t,” I say urgently as I go to my tiptoes. I brush my lips against his softly, and then whisper against his mouth. “Don’t treat me like I’m breakable. I couldn’t stand it if you did that to me. I need you to show me that you believe I’m strong, and beautiful, and as tough as bricks. If you don’t believe that about me, I won’t believe it about myself.”

I tip my head back, look into his eyes, and plead with him. “I need you to make me feel like I’m normal, Beck.”

“Christ,” he mutters, and then his hand is grasping the back of my head, fingers fisted tight in my hair. He slams his mouth down on mine while he bends his knees, dips, and with his other arm, hauls me up his body. My legs wrap around his waist and I tilt my face to get a better angle to deepen our kiss.

I roll my tongue against his, my fingers digging down deep into his shoulders. My hips rotate, trying to get contact with his dick and I make an odd keening noise when I can’t get some friction going.

Moving a hand from shoulder to the back of his head, I grip his hair hard and tug his head back at the same time I rip my mouth from his. We stare at each other, his eyes blazing with a mixture of lust and tenderness.

“Don’t hold back on me, Beck. Please don’t hold back.”

“Sela,” he rasps out as a touch of worry filters into his gaze. “I can’t help but treat you as precious. That’s not the same as breakable.”

“Understood. You can whisper sweet, precious words to me, but you better be fucking me hard while you do it.”

“Jesus,” he mutters, and his mouth is back on mine again.

He kisses me for all of maybe two, three seconds, then he turns his body toward the bed. Slipping his hands under my armpits, he dislodges my hold on him and throws me onto the mattress.

“Get naked,” he commands, and I don’t hesitate a single second. My hands work my clothes while Beck does the same, our eyes pinned on each other. I falter only a moment when his pants and underwear come off and his cock angles upward in eager anticipation. And God…my mouth waters at the sight.

Then we are naked and he is covering me.

I sigh with blissful abandon as he kisses me again, urgent and desperate movements of his mouth against mine. His hands roam all over me. Gentle fingertips against my collarbone followed by a hard pinch to my nipple. His thumb pressing in slightly and dragging down my ribs, which tickles and turns me on with equal measure. His tongue in my belly button, swirling in a teasing manner, followed by a bite to my hip bone.

Beck moves down my body and I tense up—in a good way, that is—waiting for his mouth to connect to me. For whatever reasons that I’ve never bothered to ask him, the man loves to work his mouth between my legs. He’s so goddamn good at it he can make me come almost instantly.

But right now, he teases all around my money spot with soft kisses and licks to my bare mound. His fingers press all around my pussy but don’t slip inside. He tortures me until my hips are thrusting upward in a desperate need for more contact.

And finally…finally he gives me what I need. Thumbs peeling me apart and a swirl of his tongue in a figure-eight pattern over my clit.

“Yes,” I groan, my back arching up off the bed.

Beck’s entire mouth closes over me and he groans in delight when he sticks his tongue inside me as deep as he can get it, lashing it side to side within me. My eyes roll into the back of my head, and I’m on the verge of splintering.

“Sela,” Beck says softly, and I lift my head to put hazy eyes on him.

He stares up my body at me intently. “You see this?”

Beck dips his head and strokes his tongue up my center. Pulling it back into his mouth, he licks his lips in an exaggerated fashion.

“This right here,” he says, giving me another lick and then staring back up at me. “This is mine. There is nothing down here but you and me. Sela’s pussy and my mouth, and that’s the only thing here. Doesn’t matter what happened in the past. That’s done and it’s gone. Completely gone. Just your beautiful pussy and my mouth, and well…eventually my cock, but that’s all there is here. All there ever will be. I don’t see anything in front of me other than a stunning woman who’s body belongs solely to me, and when I look upon it, I know without a doubt it was created for me. Nothing before me matters, you understand that?”