Looking around me, I searched for the knife. It was lying beside me. Picking it up, with him towering over me, I moved my hand on my cock, stroking back and forth. The blade of the knife struck at my flesh and I counted. “One…”

He stood behind me, his chest pushing against my back. I could feel him pushing inside. The pain always felt like it was too much, but I needed it. He’d made me need it.

I counted on.

Something moved before me, and I looked up, my heart beating too fast. Maddie before me, her hand over her mouth.

I worked my hand harder, needing to come. When I came, he left. Then he would leave Maddie alone. He pushed his cock against me harder. Striking the blade across my stomach, I screamed “Eleven!” and came on the hatch. The vomit came quicker this time. In seconds I leaned over the bucket at my side and emptied my stomach. But nothing came up. My head pounded and my vision became hazy when I pulled back.

Unable to remain sitting I fell over to lie on the hatch. Then I heard heavy footsteps walking away. I knew he was leaving the cabin. But I knew he’d be back… at least he was gone for now. I breathed as deeply as I could manage, but the skin across my chest stung, making it difficult.

A sniffing sound made me freeze. Blinking, I looked up at Maddie. She had dropped to her knees and now, she was just a few feet away. Then I felt an ache in my chest when I saw tears falling from her eyes. Her bottom lip was trembling and her hands were clutched in her lap.

“Flame,” she whispered when she saw me watching her. “Why did you do that to yourself?”

I wanted to move closer to her, but my body was too weak. I was so tired. Maddie shuffled closer, until she was almost at my side. She wiped at her cheeks, then asked, “Answer me, Flame. Why did you just hurt yourself?”

My mouth felt sore, my lips barely able to move, but Maddie had asked me a question and I wanted to answer. “He came for me. To release the flames, the evil. I saw him behind you, so I had to protect you. I… I had to protect you.”

Maddie stilled. I saw her throat swallow. “Who came for you?”

I thought of the man in my head—dark eyes and dark hair. “Him,” I replied, my skin crawling at his image in my head.

Maddie frowned still. “And he comes for you? To do… that?” she asked, her voice catching slightly as she spoke.

I nodded my head, then I laid my cheek to the floor. I was tired.

Maddie eyes dropped to stare at her hands. I stayed watching her. Her long black hair was touching the floor as she sat down. It was my favorite part of her. Except for her green eyes. And her small hands. I always thought of her small hands.

“I like your hair,” I said as I stared. Maddie’s green eyes lifted. A blush coated her cheeks and my stomach tightened at the sight. Every time I looked at her, my stomach clenched. And when her eyes looked at me like they were doing right now, my heart always raced. The pulse in my neck always beat faster.

“Thank you,” she whispered, and I caught her full lips hook up at the side. It made her look even more beautiful than I already thought she was.

The room became silent. Maddie took a deep breath and told me, “I like your hands.”

A feeling of heat suddenly filled my body. But it wasn’t the flames. This felt different. My muscles weren’t burning. My skin wasn’t crawling. It felt… strange…

… I frowned. Maddie had liked something on me? No one had ever liked me. No one had ever commented on how I looked. I forced my hand to move. It felt like a dead weight underneath me, but I pushed it out until it lay flat on the floor in front of me. I studied the colored tattooed skin, flames covering the entire thing.

“Why?” I croaked, and glanced up to still find Maddie watching me. “Why do you like my hand?”

The blush on her face deepened. But her eyes were watching my hand as it lay on the floor.  Suddenly, Maddie moved. She began to lie down, mirroring my position. My heart fired off like a cannon, when she lowered her head and pressed her cheek to the floor. Like this, she was looking directly into my eyes.

“Is… is this okay?” she whispered.

I nodded my head and replied, “Yeah. Just…” I tried to hold back my panic, and said, “Just don’t come near this hatch. Don’t… don’t touch me.”

“I will not,” Maddie confirmed quietly. The hand resting near her head inched forward in my direction. I stopped breathing as I thought she was going to touch me. But her hand stopped about an inch from mine.

I wondered what she was doing, when she said, “I like how your hand looks next to mine. It is so big and mine is so small. Yet I feel they look compatible.”

I focused on our hands and noticed that my hand was bigger than hers. Maddie’s little finger then extended, landing right next to mine. I thought of ripping my hand away, but something stopped me. I didn’t want her to touch me, because I didn’t want her to be hurt. My touch only ever caused people to be hurt. But I left my hand where it was, our little fingers staring at each other.

“I sometimes imagine what our hands would look like... touching. What they would look like with our fingers intertwined. I wonder if it would make me smile. At times I daydream that it would be something we could do.”

Maddie’s voice was so quiet as she spoke. I couldn’t take my eyes off our hands. I tried to picture in my head what she described. I saw her hand reaching out for mine, but then I thought of how it would make me feel, and I shook my head.