“No way,” I blurted before I could stop myself.

“And why not? Are you trying to keep me all to yourself?” Matthew continued to walk backward.

“Yes…NO…I mean….” This was not coming out right. “You’re bad for her.” I didn’t mean to say that either. Was I feeling jealous?

“Bad? You don’t even really know me.”

“I know your kind. You flirt with anything that doesn’t have a penis. You make a girl feel special, sleep with her, then crush her heart.”

“Do you think that is what I’m trying to do to you?” His playful tone changed and he was watching me so closely, that he unknowingly headed straight for a tree. I thought he would have turned around, but didn’t.

“Watch out, Matthew.” Simultaneously, we grabbed each other. With his body backed against the tree and nowhere to go, our bodies collided. Gazing into his eyes, I whispered, being too close for comfort, “Are you hurt?”

He didn’t answer, but his eyes continued to pierce into mine, searching. There was something comforting, yet terrifying about the way he was connecting with me. His hurt look surprised me.

“You must’ve dated some ass**les, Becca,” he continued. “Sure, I’ll admit I flirt a lot, but it’s my way of coping. You don’t know what I’ve been through the past two years. I was completely dead inside. I watched as the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, died in the same hospital Jenna was in. For two f**king years, I blamed myself and swore I would never fall for anyone again. But you know what? Your heart has a mind of its own. I found out you don’t have a choice. Your heart makes those choices for you and no matter how hard you fight it, you can’t. Then you’re totally screwed.”

My mouth dropped and my heart ached for him. I had no idea about what he’d been through, and I just accused him of being an ass. Wishing I could take back what I said, I closed my eyes and whispered softly, “I’m so sorry.”

Matthew continued to look at me, but with a softer expression this time. I was waiting for him to curse at me, but instead he laced his fingers through my hair, searching my eyes again. Then his gaze shifted to my lips. His breathing grew faster and intense, fighting what he wanted to do. I wanted him to kiss me so badly, but it didn’t happen. After all, he thought I was seeing someone and being the gentleman he was, I knew he wouldn’t proceed. Sliding his hand around my back, he held me tenderly.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to dump all that on you,” he said gently. “I don’t want to ruin what we have. I enjoy your company so much, Becca. You make me forget the pain. You make me forget her,” he sighed softly against the tip of my ear. There was a lot of sadness in his tone. Tears began to blur my eyes. I felt the depth of his pain shooting through every part of my being, especially into my heart.

Matthew held me longer than I had expected. When he finally released me, he was back to himself. Grabbing my hand, he started sprinting. “Come on, Becca. Let’s see how fast you can run.”

“Matthew!” I yelled. Unable to release his tight grip, I had no choice but to run with him, but it made the awkward situation better, and it felt good to run like that. Yup, he was very smooth.

17

A COUPLE OF DAYS after Christmas, Max and I met my parents for dinner. My parents paid for dinner this time around. Like the last time, we had a fabulous time getting to know each other better. Max and my dad talked about sports, and of course, my mom probed with more questions. We also had dinner last night since they were leaving tomorrow morning. Max’s driver and I took them to the airport, and then I went straight to work.

There were two more days until New Year’s Eve. I could already feel the excitement. This time around, I’ll have someone to kiss at midnight—my Max. I couldn’t wait. Not to mention spending a fun filled night with my closest friends.

Gazing quickly around the room, I noticed everyone was busy at their desks. Matthew went to a meeting with Max regarding another department, so I was holding down the fort. Though there wasn’t much to worry about, since we were all working on the same project and Matthew had delegated the jobs before he left.

Looking at my project on the screen, I started typing about the London fashion show that was coming soon, and all sorts of thoughts fluttered through me. I wondered if I would be invited to go. Since Matthew was back, would he be going instead of Max?

Heavily focused on the layout screen, I jumped when my phone buzzed on my desk. I kept it on vibrate, so it rattled. It was from Max.

Good morning, Ms. Mefferd. Missed you last night. My bed was cold and it felt so big without you.

Sorry! Can’t have me every night. You would get bored with me.

Never!!! You’re too sexy, gorgeous, and soft. Not to mention, you’ve stolen my heart, so it goes wherever you go.

Awww…gushing…blushing. You’re so sweet, Max.

Want me to make you blush even more?

Aren’t you at your meeting?

We took a break, but gotta go soon. Come over tonight. I promise you’ll be blushing all night.

I’m coming, Max!

That sounded dirty. You just made me hot all over. Need to take a cold shower. Love you, babe. Oh, by the way, I’ve ordered a sandwich for you from Café Express along with a special dessert. It’s in my office. Looks like we’re extending our meeting into lunch. I’ll miss my lunch buddy. TKLS

Thank you! You’re too good to me. See you tonight. XO