Brooke would never understand the love Lily felt for him. Hell, he hadn’t believed Lily loved him as much as he did her until Brooke’s revelations the day at the doctor’s office. That day had showed that his wife was able to look past the man he had been. Brooke had also underestimated Lily’s strength to do what it took to keep her family safe and happy, which was why he hadn’t touched her in two weeks.

She was stronger, so he would talk to her that night. He didn’t want her submissive to him if she was only doing it to please him. He would miss that aspect of their relationship, but he would suppress that side of himself if she was doing it only to make him happy. She’ll avoid the conversation, but it’s one we are going to have, Shade thought determinedly.

“I will tell you what we know. Your mother was killed in the flash flood with the rest of the village he was ministering to. Then he traveled from village to village, preaching to whoever would listen and give him and a place to stay.

“He made no attempt to come back until recently. He had come to a village where a Christian group was visiting, and they helped him get paperwork to get back in the United States.

“He showed up at the church one night when Brooke was there, and Merrick was visiting someone.” He watched her reaction carefully to Brooke’s name and gave a silent breath of relief as she continued to listen. “She told him how his congregation had fallen since he left. The egotistical bastard believed he would find it as he left it—too afraid to commit any sins.”

“He’s mentally ill.”

“No shit,” Shade snapped then calmed at seeing the hurt she tried to hide. “Angel, he’s more than mentally ill; he’s a sadistic whack job. Brooke fed that craziness, telling him about Beth’s and our relationships before we were married, that we belonged in a motorcycle gang. She fueled him into striking out then told him she would help him get his church back from Merrick, but it would take time. He would have to prove to his congregation that he deserved the church again. She stashed him at Cal’s house after she asked him who his most faithful followers were.”

“I remember Cal’s parents went there from the time they were little. They were very upset when they heard he had died.”

“They believed Saul could heal her cancer. They placed all their belief in him and even went so far as to stop her chemo, which was why she was slipping so fast. Cal wanted to tell someone, but he wanted to make his mother happy during her last days. Saul slowly contacted more members of his congregation, and they began meeting at Cal’s house.”

“Poor Cal.” Lily’s soft voice was filled with sympathy.

Shade agreed with Lily that time. The kid had wanted to give his mother peace in her last days; instead, it had been horror-ridden. She had died two days before at home, still believing Saul would save her.

“Cash has talked to him several times and warned his father to stay away from him. Because he needs the job Drake gave him, he’s signed over guardianship. He’s living with Drake and Jace.”

“I’m glad.” Lily laid her head down on his thigh. “The day we went there, it was filthy. I can’t imagine Cal living there.” She shuddered.

Razer had told them they had known something was wrong when they had entered Cal’s house. The front door had been opened by Cal, and Razer had been carrying the Crockpot. Cal’s father had slammed the door shut behind them, attacking Razer as more men jumped them. Then they had grabbed Beth and Lily, threatening to hurt them if Razer didn’t stop fighting. Saul used the storm outside to work them into a religious frenzy as proof God wanted him to punish them. They were tied up, thrown in the trunks of their cars, and driven to the other church.

“It’s over, angel,” Shade reminded her.

Lily rose to her feet. “Yes, it’s over.”

John cried from the other side of their bed.

“He’s hungry.”

“When isn’t he?” Shade joked, going to the chest to get a shirt while watching as Lily sat down on the rocking chair to nurse the baby.

They had moved back into the basement while their house was being rebuilt. He hadn’t wanted to move back downstairs after the fire, but after one night upstairs, the members coming to work the next day bleary-eyed had convinced him it was for the best. He had asked Lucky if they could use it until their house was finished and he had agreed, moving back upstairs for the time being.

Shade had alleviated his worries about his family being trapped in the back room by pulling the workers off the house for long enough to build a trap door which they could crawl through to the club room. It had only taken a day, and he was much more at ease since they had an emergency exit.

Lily switched breasts and John latched on quickly, making Shade laugh. Lily grinned down proudly, rubbing his head with a gentle hand. He took his cell phone out of his pocket, snapping a picture.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking a picture so when I want another one and you need convincing, I can show you.”

“I won’t need convincing.” She smiled softly, staring back at him with love shining in her violet eyes.

Shade took the baby, dressing him as Lily finished her makeup and brushed her hair. When he was finished, he buckled him into the carrier which would slide into the base already in Lily's car.

“Ready?” he asked, holding the door open with the carrier in his hand.

Lily picked up the bright blue diaper bag with a big picture of Elmo on the side.

“Did Sex Piston pick the ugliest one she could find?”

“That’s not nice,” Lily reproved him. “I think it’s cute.”

“I’m not carrying it, ever,” Shade warned her. “Get another one.”

“No, it would hurt her feelings.”

The ugly thing is going to disappear, Shade determined as they went out.

“It’s beautiful outside.”

Shade smiled as he walked her to the car and placed the car seat inside.

When John started to cry, Shade expertly slid his paci in his waiting mouth.

“You’re giving him that too much. He would have stopped when I started the car. You’re making him a paci baby.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that, is there, my man?” Shade bent down, kissing his son’s soft cheek before closing the door and turning to his wife. “You need me to follow you to work and pack him in for you?”

“No,” Lily said exasperatedly. “I can manage. I’ll take him into the store, and then Rachel can watch him when I go back to the car to get his bag. Satisfied? I carried enough that I can leave it there and bring it home once a week to refill.”

“Good. I won’t have that little fucker staring at me all the time,” Shade said, glaring balefully at Elmo as Lily placed the bag in the backseat before getting in behind the wheel.

Shade bent down, kissing her mouth. “Drive careful.”

“I will. I’ll see you tonight. Evie and King want to keep him tonight. I think they’re worried about the Friday parties corrupting him.” she teased.

“Angel, if my son takes after me, then the Friday parties are going to be the least of our worries.” Shade stood.

“If our son takes after you, he’ll be fine. I can’t think of a better man I would want him to be like.”