I decided to play Sadie again. My own personality was so awkward and uncertain; it was much easier to step into my Sadie persona, like slipping on a comfortable dress. Sadie would know how to do and say the right things.

Bolstered, I left the bathroom and went back to room 4. Mr. Sutton was just where I’d left him, still frowning at his phone. This time, though, he looked up when I came in, and said, “Please bring glasses and drinking water.”

“Of course,” I murmured, and slipped out again.

I almost collided with one of the dancers just outside the room. “Watch it,” she snapped at me, and then sighed and said, “Sorry. Not your fault.”

“I should have watched where I was going,” I said apologetically. I didn’t recognize her, but I didn’t know most of the dancers yet. I was still learning the names of all of the other waitresses. She looked like Marilyn Monroe, with elaborately curled white blonde hair and red lipstick, and she was wearing a short, translucent negligee. She wasn’t wearing any underneath it.

“It’s cool,” she said. “You’re serving tonight? I’m Sassy. You’re the new girl, right?”

I nodded. “I’m Regan,” I said. “Have you—do you do this often?”

“You mean private rooms, or this private room in particular?” she asked. “Both. Mr. Sutton’s a cool guy. Scarlet’s going to be dancing tonight, too. Have you met her?”

“I don’t think so,” I said.

“She’s cool too,” Sassy said. Cool seemed to be her favorite word. “Anyway, I need to get in there. Can you bring me a Coke while you’re at the bar?”

“Sure,” I said. Sassy flashed a brilliant smile at me and went into room 4.

When I returned with a loaded tray, Sassy was sitting next to Mr. Sutton on the sofa, leaning close and touching his knee, and he was laughing at something she’d said. I felt a surge of fierce jealousy. I didn’t want him touching Sassy, or even looking at her. I only wanted him to look at me.

What was wrong with me? I’d only just learned his name; I’d only spoken to him twice. It wasn’t like I had any sort of claim on him. I wanted to, though. That was the problem. From the first moment he’d looked at me with his blue eyes, I wanted him to be mine. Or, more accurately, I wanted to be his.

I didn’t understand the ugly jealousy I was experiencing, and so I did my best to swallow it down and ignore it. I set out the glasses and the water pitcher, and took Sassy her glass of Coke. She gave me that huge smile again in thanks. I could see why the clients found her appealing. She seemed fun and uncomplicated. I could imagine myself getting a manicure with her and giggling over boys.

With all the tables set, I retreated to one corner of the room, trying to make myself inconspicuous. That was a waitress’s job at the Silver Cross: to be present, constantly watching for ways to be useful, but to go unnoticed as much as possible.

The other dancer, Scarlet, came in and introduced herself to me, briefly and quietly. She clearly understood that I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. She was taller than Sassy, and dark-haired, and was wearing nothing but a g-string and heels. I still wasn’t accustomed to seeing nude women walk around all the time, and I tried very hard not to stare at her breasts as we spoke.

She went to speak with Mr. Sutton, and just then, the first guest arrived. I watched him closely as he came through the door. He was older than Mr. Sutton was, probably in his late 30s, and he was wearing a dark suit that looked expensive. I didn’t know much about suits, or about nice clothing in general, but it didn’t look like something he bought at the mall. It looked like it had been hand-made by tailors in Hong Kong or something. He was frowning, and sat down near Mr. Sutton without saying anything to him.

“Bad day?” Mr. Sutton asked. The room was small enough that I could clearly hear his words.

“The worst,” the other man said. “Market’s down. Carlson did something idiotic. The usual.” He poured himself a large drink and looked over at Sassy, who was standing near the fireplace with Scarlet. “You going to make me feel better, Sassy Belle?”

She giggled and joined him on the sofa, leaning close and pushing her breasts against his arm. “You just need a drink, Mr. Hackett. That’ll make it all okay.”

He slid one arm around her waist and held her close. “I think I might need more than just a drink.”

I watched, a little appalled but not surprised, as Mr. Hackett teased apart the silky bow holding Sassy’s negligee closed and cupped his hand over one of her exposed breasts. She let out a breathy moan and pressed closer against him.

I’d told Mr. Sutton that I wasn’t a prude, but I was. It was my most embarrassing secret, the one that even Sadie didn’t know: I was twenty-four, and I was still a virgin.

There wasn’t any particular reason for it. I’d had a few chances here and there, drunk friends of friends at parties who got a little too friendly, but I’d never met anyone I really wanted to have sex with. I’d watched enough porn to know how sex worked, but there was still something vaguely scandalous about watching Sassy get groped right in front of me: the way her nipples hardened as Mr. Hackett squeezed her round breasts, and the way her legs parted as Mr. Hackett’s hands slid down between her thighs.

I was pretty sure I wanted to have sex with Mr. Sutton.

I’d sure been thinking about it enough.

I wondered if he would touch me like that, with his big fingers rubbing against the tiny scrap of satin between my legs. And if I would arch my back like that and push up against him.

The door opened beside me, and I tore my gaze away from the scene on the sofa. Two more men had entered the room: more white guys in suits. They greeted Mr. Sutton and sat down. One of them sat beside Sassy and Mr. Hackett, and started playing with Sassy’s nipples while Mr. Hackett’s fingers worked between her legs.

The other man motioned to Scarlet, who sashayed over to him and perched on one of his knees. She leaned in close and whispered something in his ear, and he chuckled and pulled her against him, hands curling around her hips.

The door opened again, and three men came in, holding briefcases. The newcomers greeted the men who were already present, and there was a series of boisterous exclamations over Sassy and Scarlet, both of whom giggled a lot and appeared to revel in the attention. Shots were poured and toasts were made. The level of whiskey in the bottle dropped dramatically, and I slipped out to get another bottle.