Say You'll Stay Page 30


He steps forward. “I was thinking of you.” His voice is hushed. “I thought about how I could finally be the man you saw.”

“I don’t want to do this.”

“I was ready to give you everything. I could give you everything.”

“Now you can give it to Felicia.”

Zach rears back. “I told her everything.”

My heart races. “She forgave you?”

He studies me. “She understands this is difficult for both of us. Felicia isn’t the girl you remember.”

“Maybe not. I don’t know . . . she seems the same to me.”

“I get it now.” Zach’s deep voice seems amused.

“Get what?”

“You don’t want me. You’ve made that clear, but you don’t want anyone else to have me. Did you think I’d live alone and pine over you, Presley?”

Again, we go one step forward and two steps back. Of course I didn’t think that. I wished it, but I didn’t think it would happen. I tried very hard not to think of Zach. Because loving him nearly broke me apart. Even all these years later when I think of him, my heart yearns for him. Zach is the piece of my soul that’s been missing. But he’s not mine anymore.

“Thank you for the horses. Maybe one day we’ll be able to keep things civil.” I raise my brow and pat his chest.

Zach steps closer. “I know you may not want to hear this, but I will always be here for you. You have been a part of my life since I can remember. I hated not having you in it. I missed you.” His eyes stay trained on me. “I don’t know a day that’s gone by when I haven’t thought of you. So, if you want me to be the bad guy . . . fine. I’ll be that because I think you need someone to hate.”

I gasp while shaking my head. “I never wanted to hate you.”

“But you do, and I can take it. I spent enough years hating myself. Just remember what I said.”

There’s no way we can go back. I’m not the girl I once was. I appreciate his gesture, whether it was sincere or spawned from guilt. But when it comes to me, there’s a line he’s not welcome to cross. I don’t know that I can be friends with someone I loved—love—so much.

 

 

T HERE’S A STACK OF PAPERS sitting on my desk that need to be handled. I head to the office where Cooper sits in a chair with his hat over his face. I creep over and jump, making a loud bang . He leaps out of his seat ready to fight. I burst out laughing as he glares at me.

“So not funny.”

“Oh, I beg to differ.”

He slaps the dirt off his leg and sits back down. “Revenge is a sport I’m a champion of.”

I know this all too well. Cooper and I had full-out wars throughout our childhood and adolescence. Mama was always warning us she’d paddle our asses. One time, I took all of Coop’s clothes, put them in a garbage bag, and buried them. He wore the same nasty pants and shirt for four days, then Daddy threatened to sell my horse if I didn’t tell him where it was.

“I’m not exactly a loser either, dear brother.”

“Ha! You’ll never beat me.”

“Whatever.” I dismiss his antics. “What brings you to the office?”

Cooper and Wyatt never have time to stop here during the day. I honestly don’t know how they were managing anything before. Since I’ve gotten here, I’ve been able to make sense of their nonexistent filing system. My mother has been doing her best to help, but when my father retired, so did she. Instead of Cooper finding someone to run the office, he pretended the problem wasn’t there.

“No one is here nagging me.”

“Ahh.” I smirk. “Mama and Daddy are at it again?”

They want more grandbabies. They want my brother to get married. And when they can corner him, they let him have it.

“She’s trying to set me up with some girl a few towns over.”

“She pretty?” His face says it all. “Okay, then.”

“Anyway, I’m here because the boys want to go camping and explore. I thought I’d take them out for a three-day ride. You good with that?”

I’ve been on these rides. They’re not easy. “Why don’t you start with a one-day camp out?”

“Because they’re going to be men. Stop babying them.”

“I don’t baby them.”

“Sure, you don’t.” His exasperation is clear in his tone. “Look, we’ll ask them. If they want to go, which they will because I’m pretty fucking fun, then you let them.”

All of the dangers flood my brain. I went on a hundred of these trips, but I knew how to shoot a coyote. I was aware of what to watch for. Logan and Cayden have never gone camping. Todd didn’t like being outside in the wilderness, and I never pushed. I was happy with our vacationing to major cities and staying in hotels. Todd’s idea of roughing it was a hotel with no room service.

“I don’t know . . .”

“Go ahead, Pres. Raise a bunch of pussies. They’ll do great when they start school in a month. You want to send them to school not knowing how to bait a hook?”

Asshole has a point. “Fine. We’ll ask them.” Wyatt clears his throat from the door. “Let me guess . . . you think this is a good idea?”

“Cowgirl, it was my idea.”

I should’ve known.

As Cooper had predicted, the boys were ecstatic. They ran out of my room and were throwing things in bags before I even said yes. I made Cooper promise me a few things before I was fully on board. First, they take experienced horses. Those boys haven’t ridden, and we don’t know the personalities of their new horses. Second, either my father or Wyatt had to go with them too.

My father agreed to ride out, but he said he was too old to sleep out there with the “youngins.” Wyatt said he had plans, but Trent was off this weekend and would be happy to go. When I shot that down, they pointed out he was the sheriff. And my argument was lost. It’s like they’ve all forgotten the stories about Trent.

They left about an hour ago, and Mama left to go play cards with Mrs. Hennington and Mrs. Rooney, which I know she does when she tells Daddy she’s going to practice singing for the church choir. Those women haven’t practiced in thirty years.

Taking my mother’s, well, everyone’s unsolicited advice, I called Grace for a girls’ night. Thanks to my stress, I’ve lost a ton of weight and can wear some pretty cute things. I’d gone online and ordered some clothes that are a little more form fitting than I’ve been able to wear since having twins. Those kids destroyed my body.

Once in my black shorts and one-shoulder shirt, I head over to the mirror and look myself over. Staring at my reflection, I smile and let out a deep breath. I feel beautiful. More than that, I feel like a woman. My curves are smooth, my hair hangs in soft curls, my eyes are bright green thanks to my makeup, and my ass looks fantastic. At least one good thing has come of this. I throw on my cowboy boots and head to the porch.

“You got a hot date or somethin’?” Grace calls from the window of the car.

“You know it.” I laugh and climb in.

She demanded that she drive so I could relax for a little bit. It’s insane for her to think I’m going to need a designated driver, but I’m tired of fighting everyone and everything, so I go with it. That’s my plan for tonight . . . let loose and smile.

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