“Em, it’s over. It’s been over for almost two decades.” I wish my heart would accept that. Seeing him again, knowing he’s close, has me all torn up inside.

It’s like I’m fourteen all over again and he’s asking me to go on our first horseback ride. The assured grin he wore, the tight jeans that made his butt look great, and the way his eyes would convey everything he wouldn’t say. We were so young, so in love, and so idealistic.

“Sure, it is. You know, this town isn’t ready to believe that. We all watched you both. There’s not a single memory I have without you two in it. Your love is the kind people write songs about.”

Great, my life is a country song. I’m a widow, living on a ranch, driving a truck, and the long-lost “love of my life” and I are face to face. All I need is a dog.

“I think you all remember things very different. And we’re not in love anymore. Besides, if our love was so special, we would still be together.”

Emily grabs my hand. “I’m serious, Pres. You’ll see. Y’all are soul mates.”

I give her hand a squeeze as I shake my head. “There’s no such thing.”

She stands and grins. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”

I get out of my seat and give her another hug. “I think it’s time everyone lets it go.”

“Whatever. Love doesn’t let go, it grows stronger. I’ll see you soon?” she asked, leaning in to give me a kiss on the cheek.

“Definitely.”

I open the door to leave and see the truck I’d know anywhere. There’s no way I want to see him. I yank my sweatshirt hood over my head and rush to my car. The more I can avoid him, the safer my heart will be.

A knock on my office door causes me to stop working. “Zach?” I push my glasses up the bridge of my nose and stand. I should’ve known avoiding him wasn’t really going to work when he can roll up any ol’ time he wants. It was only a matter of time.

“Sorry to stop by without callin’, but the other night wasn’t exactly the best place for us to talk.” He removes his hat and tosses it on the chair. “I saw you in town yesterday trying to be incognito. Figured we should try to be civil.”

Civil? He can’t just show his face when he wants. He doesn’t belong here. I don’t want to see him at all, much less in my home, the one place that’s my safe haven. Damn him for not taking the fucking hint.

“Your mother said you were out here. She didn’t throw something at me, so I took that as a good sign.”

“What are you doing here?” I stand, slamming my hand on the desk. “My mother may not have thrown anything because she’s a proper Southern woman, but I’m not anymore. I’ve spent enough time in the North to not give a shit if I pelt you in the head with a stapler!” I grab it off the desk and rear back.

“Whoa! Whoa!” he says with his hands raised. “I’m not coming to start anything. I just want to see how you are. I’ve missed you.”

“Asshole!” I throw the stapler at his head. “You don’t get to miss me!”

He ducks as it makes a loud bang against the wall. Zach’s eyes widen as his lips turn up. “Seems all those years watching me play ball taught you how to throw.”

I grab the next thing I see. “You apparently sucked at teaching!”

“Felicia and I wanted to invite you over for dinner.”

He has lost his damn mind.

Zach lets out a sigh and moves closer. “I know it could be awkward, but I figured if . . .”

“If what? That there’s a chance we could be friends? Hang out even? You need your head examined if you think that’ll happen.” I don’t know if maybe he forgot how we ended things.

“Pres,” he chides.

“Don’t ‘Pres’ me! You have some nerve showing up here.”

“It was a long time ago.” I want to sock him in the face.

“Leave,” I demand.

Zach walks closer and crosses his arms across his chest.

“I’m not leaving until we settle this. I want us to get things out in the air.”

“Fine.” I grab the paper clip holder and toss it. I miss again. “That was in the air.” I look for something else to launch at him.

“Stop throwing things!” He moves closer with his hands raised in surrender.

I glare at him. “Don’t tell me what to do. We have nothing to say to each other.”

Zach half laughs as he grips my arms. “I think there’s a lot to say, Pres. It’s been a long time.” He releases my arms and gives me a look that says: “Don’t throw anything.”

“I have nothing to say to you.”

“If we’re both living here now, I think we owe it to each other to air out the past.”

I fight the hundreds of snarky comments that sit on my tongue. “Right. Just like that. We can hash out the fact that you cut me to pieces faster than a hot knife through butter. What was I thinking?” I clutch my chest in mockery. “Please, by all means, sit.” I motion for the chair in front of him. “Let’s air out the fucking past.”

He looks at me with a smug grin. “You haven’t lost your sarcasm.” Zach moves around to the chair in front of my desk and sits slowly, keeping his eyes on me. At least I have him scared I’m going to chuck something at him. Next thing to go flying is my boot.

“I haven’t lost my temper either.”

“First,” he says, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “I’m truly sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I loved you so much, and leaving you that day was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve lived my whole life regretting that choice.”

I sit back as the air expels from my lungs. “That’s what you start off with? For Christ’s sake, Zach, let’s not waste any time getting to the heavy stuff.”

“If I didn’t say it now, I don’t know if you’d let me have that chance.” His fingers run through his hair, which means he’s nervous. At least it’s not just me. “I’ve never forgiven myself for hurting you.”

I roll my eyes. “You didn’t hurt me. You killed me. But that’s all in the past. I’m over it, and you.”

“Was the stapler itchin’ to be thrown?”

“Are you saying I’m not over you? Do you think I’ve spent all this time pining for you?” I ask with my arms crossed. Idiot.

“I didn’t mean—” He stops. “I didn’t think you were.”

Years I’ve wanted to hear those words. I wanted to know how it was so easy for him to choose baseball over me. I was his fiancée. He made me promises. I’ve never loved anyone like Zach. First love is naïve. I was open and trusting. I didn’t hold back on how much love I gave; he got every ounce inside of me. He took over every nook and cranny. There are spaces inside that Todd never could touch because they were Zach’s. I hate him for that. I hate that I would look at Todd sometimes and wish he acted like Zach. It is irrational and unfair, but that’s the truth.

“So, Felicia, huh?”

“She’s changed,” he says.