Say You'll Stay Page 12


“You need help, baby girl?”

I stand with my arms full and almost drop them again. “I’m okay, Daddy.”

“Are you?”

No. “Yeah, I’m good.”

“Okay.” He clearly doesn’t believe me. “Cooper hasn’t done much with this side of the business. I know I’m retired, but would you let me know if he screwed up real bad?”

I don’t think that’s really why he’s here, but it’s sweet. My dad and I were always close when I was a kid. I was the only girl, and he hung the moon. “Of course, Daddy. I’ll make sense of it soon.”

“You were always the one with the brains,” he chortles.

“Well.” I stop. “Not when it comes to certain things.”

Daddy nods with a knowing grin. “Boys were always your downfall, sugar. But I think you got it right with my grandbabies.”

Yeah, I sure did. They’re great boys with a lot of love to give. “I was lucky with them.”

“Nah.” He waves his hand. Daddy walks over to a shelf where all my rodeo ribbons and trophies are. “Remember how mad your mama would get when I’d take you out to practice?”

“I do. She would refuse to let you eat anything she cooked for the day.”

My mother’s sister died when she was a little girl from a riding accident. My mother was dead set against me barrel racing, but my father would sneak me out. It was in my blood, my mind, and it lived deep in my heart. I think my father saw that and knew I would find a way regardless of what my mama wanted.

It was our thing. We’d wake up real early and ride out to the edge of the property. Cooper and Daddy had their hunting and crap, but the bond between me and my father was special. At least I thought so.

My father’s eyes pierce me. “I would’ve gone hungry if it meant I got to see your smile when you rode.”

“Daddy,” I murmur.

“None of that.” He looks away.

I come around the desk, place my hand on his shoulder, and squeeze. “Maybe we could go for a ride?”

His eyes fill with joy as he looks at me.

Finally, after a second he answers, “I think we could arrange something.”

“Good.” I smile. “Let me know.”

“How about tomorrow?” he asks with hope laced in his voice.

“Perfect.”

Daddy pulls me into his arms. “I’ve missed you, darlin’. I missed you so much.”

I grab on, holding him close and fighting back the tears. It feels good having a sense of forgiveness between me and my parents. I didn’t realize how much I needed it. They love me, and they love the boys. My desire to keep away was never fully about them though. It was about the town, the feeling of failure, and the whispers about how I belonged with Zach. There’s not a place I turn here that doesn’t remind me of him, which means that my parents, Cooper, and this town are all tied to him. And he made it clear he didn’t want to be tied to me when he made the choice to leave me. Now I need to find a new rope to hold on to.

 

 

“W HY WOULD YOU DO THIS, Todd? Why would you choose to leave us like that?”

“I thought I was helping.” His sad voice washes over me.

I look at him, only now I see him differently. This time I notice the sadness around his eyes. The way he really doesn’t look at me, more like through me. My tears fall when I see the pain I’m feeling reflected back at me.

“It hurts so much. I’m so angry with you,” I tell him as we sit on our knees.

Todd sits beside me and cries as well. “I’m angry with me. I wish I could’ve been a better man. I tried so hard to make things right, but I couldn’t do it anymore, Pres. I couldn’t keep going.”

“Not even for me? Or for Logan and Cayden?” I ask through my sobs.

“I miss them. I knew I would, but I would’ve failed them far worse if I stayed.”

“No!” I shake my head in denial. “You broke us! I don’t know how to do this. I’ve never felt so alone or scared.”

His hand rises as if he’s going to touch my cheek, but drops it. “You’ll be fine, my love. You were always so strong. So beautiful. I left knowing you’d be okay.”

“You left us with nothing!” My emotions ping pong back and forth as I try to get my answers. “I had to leave our home, our lives have been flipped upside down. Do you know what this has done to the boys? You were selfish to think this was the answer. You had options!”

Todd’s tears fall as he listens to my weeps. “I knew you’d hate me. But I knew you’d move on. You’ll be fine, Presley.”

“Do you think I’m fine? I’m not fine, Todd! Why didn’t you just talk to me?”

His lips purse. “Would you have listened?”

 

These dreams are killing me. Each night it’s something. It’s been a week since we’ve been at the ranch and I haven’t slept peacefully once. I sit up with tears running down my face—tears of rage.

Rage that he did this.

That he gave me so much and then took it away. I loved him for so long, and now I feel like I never knew him. It would’ve been difficult for him to face the mess he put us in, but those two boys sleeping in the other room were all the reason he needed.

They don’t deserve this. And for the pain he inflicted on them . . . I’ll never forgive him.

I grab my phone to check the time. Ugh, three in the morning. I’ll never be able to fall back asleep. I get up, grab my phone, and head out to walk off the anxiety building inside me.

My mind races with my dream conversation with him. Would I have listened? What the hell is that? I comprehend this was a dream and this is all in my mind, but that last line has my stomach in knots.

As my feet carry me, my thoughts begin to settle. My anger abates, and I’m left with the knowledge that it was just a dream. A very vivid dream, but it wasn’t real.

I find myself standing in front of the stall of my beautiful horse. “Hi, Casino.” I smile as he walks toward the door. “Sorry I haven’t been here to see you.” His head comes over the opening and I rub his nose. “Aww, I missed you too. You look tired, boy. Are they taking good care of you, huh?”

He’s so much older now, as am I, but I can’t help but travel back in time. I got him the year before I left for college. I think my parents hoped I would stay close to home for him. I spent hours training him between Zach’s ball games.

Life was simple then. School, horses, Zach, and leaving here as soon as I could. I worked hard to get into the college where Zach was on a full ride. I promised him I would go where he went after two years of long distance, we’d have a few years together, and then he’d enter the draft. I kept my end of the deal. Followed through on it all. He promised me eternal love and broke it with one decision. Funny how that works.

I rub Casino’s neck, soothing both him and me.

“Well, why don’t you saddle him up?” a familiar voice says from behind me.

“You’re the foreman.” I smile as I turn to see Wyatt. “Isn’t that your job?”

His navy blue jeans and white shirt cling to him, and the Stetson on his head makes him look rugged. “Aren’t you spunky this morning? What are you doing awake at this hour?”

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