Red clouds my vision. I clench my fists tight, trying to stop myself from ripping him out of the car and beating the piss out of him. Out of the corner of my eyes, I see him tense. Cooper knows I’m not a man who backs down from a fight, he isn’t, either.

In the back of my mind, I know that would be a mistake. If I get in a fight with him, there’s a chance Grace will see it different. I can’t run the risk of pushing her further away because I kicked her new boyfriend’s ass.

“There isn’t a future for you and Grace. I think we both know that. If she had feelings for you, she wouldn’t hesitate. So, why are you doin’ this?”

“Why are you?” he asks with annoyance. “Because I’m not walkin’ away. I like Grace. I like her a lot, and she deserves better than the shit you’ve given her.”

I know this.

He isn’t wrong, but I’m done being that man. Seeing Grace walk away that day was enough to snap me out of this. Then, knowing she’s with him set my plan in motion. Watching her smile at him fucking kills me. The thought of her kissing him makes me go insane. And the mere idea of another man touching her body? You’ll have to kill me before I let that happen.

She’s the girl I love. The girl I’ve always loved but was too stupid to hold on to.

That won’t happen again.

“If you care about her, you won’t make this harder on her than it already is. You and I both know who she loves. And it ain’t you.” I growl as I point my finger at his chest.

“Do you hear yourself? You don’t get to make that choice for her. I’m not the one who hurt her and fucked with her head. That’s all on you, buddy.”

“Fuck you.”

“No, fuck you, Trent. You had all the time in the world to be with her. Even after she’s done with you, you think you get a say in her life?”

“I’m not makin’ a choice for her!”

Cooper folds his arms across his chest and shakes his head. “I’m not sure what to say to you. I didn’t set out for any of this to happen. I really didn’t. I went back and forth on whether goin’ after her was the right thing to do.”

I answer for him. “It wasn’t.”

“And what you’re doin’ now is?”

I’m not sure what I’m doing, but I can’t stand idly by and let this happen. I can’t give up on her—on us. Maybe walking away would be the noble thing, but I can’t do it. I won’t do it.

“No, but I don’t know how to live in a world without her.”

Losing Grace and knowing she was through with me was agonizing.

She has the purest heart, and I know she doesn’t want to hurt anyone. I get that her not wanting to be strung along anymore has forced her to push me away. But at the same time, I don’t think she will ever be done. Grace wouldn’t have kissed me like that. She wouldn’t tell me she loves me or be so worried about this. She needs to see that I won’t ever be that man again, and she’ll come back to me.

Cooper points his finger at my chest, and I see the determination in his eyes. Cooper is going to fight. “Better get used to it, my friend. I’m not givin’ up. You had your chance, now it’s mine.”

“We’re not friends,” I say simply.

Needing to calm myself, I put the car in drive and focus on not causing bodily harm. When I decided to start this conversation, my intention was to let Cooper know how this would be going down, but now the part of me that’s his friend, isn’t sure he sees the writing on the wall. He can fight for her, but he’ll lose.

I pull into his driveway on a cloud of dust and brake lights. “She won’t ever love you, Coop.” My words fall from my mouth as he opens his door. “I’m not tryin’ to be a dick, but I know her. She’s tryin’ to be strong and push me away, but you don’t know what we had, either.” I think about how when she’s happy, it can brighten the room. How her eyes would go soft right before her lips would touch mine. Grace has been hurt, but Cooper isn’t the man who will fix her. “And you can try to give her what you think she wants, but at the end of the day, it’ll be me she sees when she closes her eyes. So, enjoy what little time you’ve got now, because it won’t last.”

He doesn’t bother responding before he slams the door shut. There’s nothing either of us can say that will change anything. The person I need to convince is her, and that’s what I intend to do.

Chapter 8

Grace

I ’m dreaming . I know this because everything feels like it’s on the edge of reality, but I refuse to open my eyes. I drank two entire bottles of wine when I got home from my disastrous date. I’m a lightweight by nature, but I let the adult grape juice flow without a care in the world.

There’s something to be said about the freedom from thought. After bottle number one, I didn’t give a shit about anything. My date may have gone from awkward to absolutely comical, but I survived and even agreed to try again.

As I was on the last “glass,” which by then I was drinking straight from the bottle, I felt euphoric. I was wearing my pajamas and dancing myself senseless to angry white girl music.

Men. They ruin everything.

However, this hazy state of sleep is perfect. I plan to savor every second of it.

Right now, I’m dreaming I’m in Trent’s arms.

I curl my body deeper into his warmth and inhale. I even got the scent right. My face glides against the pillow, as I imagine the feel of his skin. My arm tightens a little bit so I can hold on as long as I can.

“I wish it was always like this,” I mumble against his body. “I wish you loved me. I wish you would come back to me the way we used to be.”

“I never left.” His deep sleepy voice rumbles through my head.

I keep myself in my happy place and relish this moment. I spent a long time waking up like this. Having him hold me, keep me safe, and make me feel like I’m everything to him. It’s this moment I cling to. Because each day that started this way was perfect. He was just Trent. No walls, no weird commitment issues, he was open, happy, and full of love. I never had to question him in the morning.

It was as the day went on when things would change.

“You always leave,” I remind him. I figure I might as well lay it all out there since this isn’t real. “You take your love away and it hurts.”