I couldn’t believe I forgot that photo.

Then, forcing myself to get over it, I vowed I’d never forget it again.

I also found something else I forgot. The necklace Mom used to wear all of the time. My faded memory banks were uncertain but I thought she’d stopped wearing it a year or so before she disappeared.

It was a thin gold chain which hung to the dip in the throat and linked on either side to a pendant that was a connected, scrolled, elegant “E” and “S” the top curve of the “E” and the bottom curve of the “S” each had a diamond in it.

When we left, I held the picture to my belly, the necklace in my fist and I got in Vance’s Explorer.

I asked Ralphie and Buddy and they let me put the picture on their shelves.

I put the necklace on for the party.

Then I helped my boys get ready for the party. The girls and guys came over, we drank, we toasted, we ate, we went to the strip club and we had a complete and total blast.

After awhile, Jet’s sister, Lottie came on and I forever would never cast judgment on strippers again. She was sultry, she was intoxicating, she could move so beautifully it was art, not stripping. She had me enthralled within seconds and on my feet (with everyone else) after moments. She danced for two songs and only took her fabulous, turquoise-and-peacock-blue-sequined bra off at the last minute, exposing perfect br**sts for only a flash before the lights went black.

She was, as Roxie said, the shit.

No doubt about it.

“Oh… my… God!” I shouted to Roxie and Jet’s eyes came to me. “I want to be her.” I looked at Jet. “Do you think she’ll teach me to dance?”

Jet grinned.

“Who you think taught her to dance, sugar?” Daisy asked me on a Christmas Bells giggle. “In my day, I had a velvet rope too.”

I stared at Daisy.

“Then you’re the shit too!” I screamed at her then looked back at Roxie. “I wanna strip!”

“Oh Lord,” Shirleen groaned, sitting down. “First she wants to be a rock star now she wants to be a stripper.” Then she lifted her hand and snapped her fingers at no one in particular. “Somebody, get her another appletini before we gotta explain to Hector ‘Mr. Edge’ Chavez why his woman wants to strip.”

Everyone started laughing and I did too.

Hard.

So hard, my sides hurt and I bent forward and wrapped my arms around my middle.

Finally, I found something funny.

The very thought of someone telling Hector I wanted to strip, not to mention Shirleen calling him “Mr. Edge”…

Well…

It was, quite simply, hilarious.

Stevie found a waitress and we all got more drinks.

And I sat with my girls and (some of) my boys and looked around them, something settling safely inside me. That something was me thinking that, finally, I was living a beautiful life and hoping that, wherever she was, my Mom could see me and she was happy.

It was on my fourth sip of my new appletini when Roxie said something to me, I looked at her and she looked blurry.

I blinked and lifted my hand to my head all of a sudden feeling funny.

I couldn’t put my finger on it but I wasn’t right.

I felt a presence at my back and Lenny leaned into my ear. “Gotta go escort Bonnie to her car. She’s got a kid, her shift ends early. I’ll be back in ten. Don’t move.”

I nodded but it felt like my head was immersed in water, not in a warm, snugly, comfy, safe way, and I was fighting the current.

I took another sip of appletini, hoping to wash the weird feeling away but it didn’t help. In fact, I felt worse, woozy, fuzzy and not myself.

Boy, those appletinis were serious business!

I leaned into Roxie and whispered, “I think I’ve had too much. I’m going to go splash water on my face.”

Roxie looked behind me, saw Lenny gone and I heard her say, “Wait,” but I got up, shoved my purse strap over my shoulder and tripped, grabbed onto the back of a chair, righted myself and staggered forward.

I definitely needed to splash water on my face.

Definitely.

“I’m going with Sadie, we’ll be back.” I heard Roxie say but I didn’t wait for her.

I moved forward, the room seemed to be swaying, the huge crowd of people going in and out of focus.

Something was really wrong, terribly wrong and because of that I was on a mission, pushing through, sliding by, evading, weaving. It was easy for me, even though I was in pumps, I was small and the men were stationary, eyes on the stage. I nearly made it to the hall where the bathrooms were when I ran headfirst into someone.

I felt arms go around me and I looked up at the man I ran into but I couldn’t keep him in focus.

I was almost certain he was smiling at me then the smile faded.

“Hey babe, you okay?”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

His fuzzy face got closer. “You gonna puke?”

And I knew, somehow, this wasn’t drunk, this was something else, something bad, really, really, really bad.

Something that happened to Veronica Mars!

I shook my head.

“Sadie, hold up!” I heard Roxie call from what seemed like far away. I looked over my shoulder, trying to find her and thinking I saw her fighting the crowds to get to me, Tex close to her back.

I turned to the man whose arms were around me.

“I’ve been roofied,” I said to him.

“What?” he asked.

“Roofied. Someone slipped me a date rape drug.”

I felt, vaguely, his body going solid and I saw, in a fuzzy way, his head whip to the side.

“Jamie, see that big black guy? He’s the owner. Get to him, fast. Tell him someone’s slippin’ date rape shit in his drinks.” He started pulling me back out of the crowd to the hall, “You got friends here?” he asked me.

“Yes.” I tried to lift my arm but it didn’t work, still I said, “Over there.”

I felt my body collapse into him because I couldn’t hold myself up anymore.

He took my weight, his arms went tighter around me and he muttered, “Fuck. Hang on.” Then something happened, I couldn’t tell what but I heard the man say, his voice sharp, “What the f**k?” Then there was an ugly thud, he was falling and, as his arms were around me, I was falling with him.

I was on the floor, tangled up with him, I heard my name shouted then screamed but I was being lifted in the air, arms holding me tight, someone running with me.

I tried to control my head, look to see who had me, I was jostled when the person turned, he shoved a door open with his back and I felt the cold night air.