Dump and Chase: Nashville Assassins: Next Generation Read online

  “Are you in love with her?” she asks, and I shake my head.

  “I don’t even know what love is.”

  Dad holds out his hand to me. “Why is that?”

  “’Cause I’ve never been with anyone to find out,” I answer, and when I see the tears gather in my mom’s eyes, I look away. “It’s not a big deal.”

  “Aiden, it’s a huge deal. We don’t want that for you. You deserve to love someone. To be loved. Don’t let what happened to me hold you back.”

  I look up, meeting her gaze. “That’s hard when I heard you cry. When I saw you try and try to find someone to fill that hole he left you with. You’d lie in bed with me, and I could see the pain on your face. You were never complete, never happy—”

  “Aiden, you were the light of my life. I was always happy—”

  “Yes, with me. But when it was just you, or even with AA, you were sad. You were bitter, you were angry, because all you wanted was the love of your life. You wanted the man who completed you. And I’m sorry, I can’t do that.”

  “Can’t do what?” Dad asks, his hand slipping around my mom and scooting her beside him so he can hold her. “We are happy, Aiden. We are in love. This is a great life.”

  “But it doesn’t erase the fact that she was miserable for a long time. Six years, to be exact. So you want me to just give in to that, feel that, and then have it go away?” Both of their faces are filled with such turmoil. “Don’t you remember, Mom? Not everyone gets a happily ever after, so why should I even chance it?”

  Tears stream down my mom’s face, and I hate it. I didn’t want to make her cry. She gets up and comes around the table. I don’t move until she makes me, turning me in my chair before taking my face in her hand. “You chance it for this,” she says, gesturing around the room. “For a family. A home. A love that will last a lifetime. Yes, your father broke me, but he also put me back together. He gave me the best life I could ever ask for—”

  “But I don’t want that pain,” I tell her.

  She blinks as the tears fall down her cheeks, and then she slowly lowers to her knees, cupping my face in both her hands. “The truth is, punkin’, everybody can hurt you, but you gotta find the one worth hurting for. The one who may hurt you but will love you even harder. We’re human. We make mistakes. It happens.”

  As I stare into her flooded green eyes, I find myself asking if Shelli is worth hurting for. I see her blue eyes, her quick grin, and I can feel her laugh in my soul.

  Is she?

  “Punkin’, I found mine, and then I lost him. Did I do things wrong? You’re damn right I did, but I was young, I was hurt, and I was mad. Dad and I both made bad choices, him with the drinking and me with keeping him away from you completely. I tried to stop myself from being hurt again, and I was miserable. I hurt him and he hurt me, but here we are. My heart belongs to him, and sometimes, if you’re lucky, that’s how it is. You find the one you belong to, the one you were made for, and that’s it.”

  I swallow hard as I get lost in her loving eyes. “I don’t want to get hurt.”

  She holds my face. “But is the fear of hurt enough to keep you from feeling complete?”

  I look down at my hands as I absorb everything they are saying. “I hear you guys, but I honestly don’t know what to say. I don’t know what I’m feeling.”

  “Is it serious? You and Shelli?”

  I swallow past the lump in my throat. “I don’t… I think so. I miss her, a lot, and I love being with her.”

  She pats my face. “Ask yourself if you can live without her, and you’ll know if it’s serious or not.”

  It’s serious.

  I don’t say that, though. I just nod as she kisses my temple. “Now we have to figure out a way to protect you from the wrath of Shea Adler when he finds out.” She looks to my dad then. “I can’t lose him. I love him the most.”

  A grin pulls at my lips at the sounds of distress from my siblings in the living room. But then it disappears when I realize my whole family now knows about Shelli. They know I don’t know what I’m feeling.

  But all I want to know is if I’ll get hurt.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  SHELLI

  I’M A TAD BIT ANNOYED.

  As I sit at the kitchen table, working on the scheduling and other details, I find myself looking back at my phone every minute or so. It’s pathetic and I’m aware, but it’s unlike Aiden not to text or call me. We haven’t gone a day without talking since we started this, and I really don’t know what is going on. Since I have my pride, I refuse to text him first. He said he would text me when he was done with dinner. That was twenty-four hours ago—not that I’m keeping up with it or anything.

  What did I do?

  When my phone sounds, I look down to see it’s Amelia.

  Amelia: You did nothing. Don’t turn this into something it’s not. He has probably just been busy.

  But even so, he would at least text me. Tell me so. I don’t know… Something seems off. Not that I tell that to Amelia. I don’t want to seem needy or obsessed with him. I’m not… Well, maybe a little. But in my defense, he’s absolutely wonderful. I love spending time with him. I love talking to him. I love laughing with him. I really love being in bed with him.

  Who am I kidding? I love him. All of him.

  Every single fiber of him. And I really want him to love me. I want him to look into my eyes, hold my face, and I want to hear him utter those words. So badly. A part of me wants to believe that he’s getting there, that he actually does care for me, but the other part is telling me I’m delusional. It won’t happen. Aiden Brooks, love me? Please, why would he? I may think I’m enough, but no one has ever been enough for him.

  “Working?”

  I look up as Mom comes into the kitchen. She’s wearing her robe, as she should since it’s almost nine at night. Meanwhile, I’m wearing jeans and a tee in the hopes that Aiden will call. Even if he does, I shouldn’t go. I should stay here, even if I don’t want to. I miss him, and he’s leaving tomorrow night for a long road trip. That’s the reason I thought I was staying the weekend with him. It’s rare that they have a weekend off, but with back-to-backs in two different cities, I guess they thought it would be a nice break. It would be, if I were with Aiden.

  “Yeah, trying to get a spot for the shoot.”

  She nods as she pulls out the chair. “You should do it at the arena.”

  I shrug, wrinkling my face at her. “That’s so overdone. I kind of want to do it in a park or even a really rustic house. I don’t know. I want it to feel homey, if that makes sense. Like the guys on the couch with the pups or even in a truck? Just something really down-home.”

  Mom nods. “Well, you could do it here.”

  My lips curve. “That would be free.”

  “What’s free?” Dad asks as he pulls out a chair, sitting down across from me.

  Mom leans into him, kissing his shoulder. “The house, for the spring fundraiser. A photo shoot with dogs.”

  “That would be cool,” he says, wrapping his arm around Mom. They share a look, and I love how in love they are. I want that kind of love, and I want to believe I’ll have it. But for that to happen, Aiden would have to love me. “So I guess you’re liking this gig, then?”

  I nod eagerly. “I am. I love it.”

  “Well, I don’t think anyone could do it as well as you are. You’re gonna make us even more proud of you, aren’t you?”

  I grin at him, nodding. “That’s my goal.”

  He pats my hand as Posey comes into the kitchen. She falls into the chair beside my mom before Mom asks, “Have you decided what you’re going to do about the audition?”

  I look down at my hands. I haven’t told Aiden about it, but I’m unsure what I want to do. I don’t want to leave him, but I have always wanted to be in Chicago. It’s one of my top three shows. I can’t stay for a guy, I know I can’t, and I also suspect he wouldn’t let me. We’re both too goal-oriented. “I don’t k