Obsidian (New Species Book Eight) Read online

  Alli glanced back. “At me?”

  “At you being gone. He knows you didn’t abandon him. I left no doubt in his mind that you had no choice. Moon and I were very blunt with him.” She lowered her voice. “Although I wanted to break it to him more gently.”

  “What does that mean?”

  Breeze moved close enough to peer outside. “Moon and I had different ideas of the best way to handle Obsidian. It worked out well though. He’s made friends and has a job.”

  “Really?” That was good news.

  “Lots of friends. Moon taught him how to drive and guessed right when he believed he’d take well to delivering things around Homeland.”

  She wanted to ask about women but couldn’t stand to hear the answer. It might very well shatter her heart if Breeze named off the ones Obsidian had slept with. She turned, spotting him again. It wasn’t hard to do since her eye was naturally drawn to his tall frame. It was torture being so close yet so far away from him.

  “Aren’t you curious?”

  “About what?”

  “If he bonded with another female.”

  The knife in her heart turned into a javelin. She said nothing, didn’t even look back, unable to face that possibility yet. In her mind, she liked to imagine he pined for her as much as she did for him. The bad thing about daydreams was reality had to come crashing in at some point.

  “Allison?”

  “Don’t,” she whispered. “I don’t want to know.” I couldn’t take it.

  “You no longer care about Obsidian? I am surprised.”

  Her head whipped around, gaping at Breeze. “I still love him. Not a day has gone by when I didn’t worry that he’d meet someone else and forget all about me. I just…” emotion choked her.

  A smile played at the Species’ lips. “There were none. He refused all offers to share sex.”

  Knees weakened in relief. “Really?”

  A sharp nod. “He said he was done with females.”

  That respite was short-lived. “What does that mean?”

  “His mate rejected him and he was separated from you. He said he didn’t want another female to matter to him.”

  She gazed back out the window, silently suffering. “Were there a lot of women who hit on him?” It was pathetic to ask but she couldn’t resist.

  “Many. He’s attractive and mysterious to our kind since he’s different. They are accustomed to being pursued by males and he isn’t into the chase.”

  Had Breeze hit on him? She bit that question back, smothering it in a blanket of jealousy. It was stupid to feel that way since he wasn’t hers. Regret was a bitter pill to swallow. She should have signed those mate papers. It would have given her access to him sooner, possibly even prevented her from being sent away in the first place.

  “He is also exceedingly polite and courteous. Many of our females are charmed by him when he drops off packages and supplies to them during his work shifts. Some believe he is too shy to touch them while others think he might be too embarrassed to reveal his bare skin if he has scars.”

  That had Alli not only stunned but gaping at Breeze. It had to be a joke but there wasn’t a hint of a smile or humor when she studied her closely. There were a lot of ways Alli could describe Obsidian but none of those fit the man she’d known. He was aggressive, a bully, opinionated, blunt, and sometimes downright crude. He also didn’t have a modest bone in his body when it came to stripping out of his clothes or taking them off a woman.

  “Obsidian?” Maybe Breeze had started to talk about someone else and she’d been too distracted to notice.

  “Yes. He is very sweet and docile now. He’s really taken to Species life. You should be very proud of him.”

  She turned to the window again, not wanting Breeze to see her pain. It seemed her leaving might have been the best thing to happen to him. His personality had undergone a drastic change and he’d thrived in her absence. Guilt nagged at her when she identified her disappointment. It wasn’t right but she’d hoped he’d been like a bear with a thorn stuck in his paw and only she’d be able to make it all better for him when she returned. Reality bit her hard in the ass.

  Obsidian laughed at something someone said, smiling so big she could see the white of his teeth from three floors above. He seemed really happy and carefree as he played and interacted with his new friends. He had found a home finally and she wasn’t a part of it.

  Breeze touched her shoulder. “They will be finished soon and scatter when the game ends. We need to hurry to make sure we don’t have to track him down to another location. He will be surprised to see you.”

  “No one told him I was coming?” She figured they would have but she’d obviously been wrong.

  “We thought it would better if he just saw you.”

  Warily she faced Breeze, carefully studying her. The only reason to avoid telling him of her visit was if they expected him to take the news in a negative light. She’d asked to see him from afar just so she didn’t act like an idiot by gawking at him or throw herself into his arms. Instead the time watching him hadn’t given her a moment of composure first. It had just shown her how he didn’t need her anymore.

  The other woman avoided eye contact, her smile seeming a little forced. “Let’s go.”

  Alli didn’t budge. “What is going on? Why wasn’t he told I was invited to visit him?”

  Breeze glanced at the floor, the wall, even at the ceiling before finally meeting her gaze. “We weren’t sure how he would respond. He has refused to speak of you at all. Every time Moon or I, anyone for that matter, says your name, he just walks away. No discussion, no explanation. He just avoids us for a day.”

  That was really disheartening and telling at the same time. “Take me back to the gates. The task force is waiting there to drive me back to Fuller.”

  Dark-brown eyes narrowed. “We’re going to surprise him downstairs.”

  “I’m leaving.” Alli inched around Breeze, heading for the door.

  The woman gripped her shoulder, holding her fast. “Not so fast.”

  Frustration, fear of the unknown and possible heartache battled. “You didn’t tell him I was coming and you said he gets angry just hearing my name. It’s obvious that he won’t want to see me. I’m not going to do that to myself.”

  “Do what?”

  “Watch him reject me,” she admitted. “It would tear me apart.”

  “Leaving without talking to him would do the same. You won’t know how he reacts until you face him. Both of you were once bonded. The attraction could still be very alive.”

  It was on her part but Obsidian might have grown to resent her. All the fears she’d had of him using her for a crutch to get past the pain of losing his mate and waking in a new world brought her insecurities to the front again.

  “You’ll regret leaving if you don’t at least say hello. What could it hurt?”

  “It would destroy me from the inside out if he looks at me any different than he used to,” she whispered, admitting her deepest fear. “I still love him. I never stopped.”

  Breeze sighed softy. “You won’t know until you face him. Love is so complicated. I’m glad I don’t suffer from it and hope I never do. It’s amazing how smart, strong people turn into frail, frightened idiots once their hearts are involved.” The hand dropped away. “Let’s go and get this over with. At best, you’ll be dealing with a male who is starved of sex and he’ll make up for lost time between you two. At worst, he’ll state that your coming for this visit was a mistake. You’ll have your answer either way.”

  “I’m terrified.”

  “He won’t harm you physically. I can guarantee that.”

  “That’s not what I’m afraid of.”

  “I know. I was trying to use humor during a stressful moment. Big fail on my part. Let’s go. You’re still stalling.”

  “Shouldn’t you warn him first or something? Give him a minute at least to let it sink in that I’m here before he’s confronted?”