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Obsidian Page 22
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“There is nothing amusing about you refusing to mate with me.”
“I mean, just give yourself some time so we’re both sure of this.”
“You are the one who is saying no.” He said the words gruffly, obviously a little angry.
“I want to say yes but I never want you to feel trapped by me or unhappy. It would break my heart to lose you that way.”
“Mates are forever.”
“That’s why I’m insisting we wait.”
“You belong to me, Alli.”
The sad way he said her name tore her apart. He honestly didn’t seem to understand the sacrifice she made by being strong enough to say no. “We’ll wait until you settle into the men’s dorm and meet more Species. Adjust to being free and the new world you’re in before you make that kind of serious decision.”
“They aren’t taking you away from me. We will move into the men’s dorm together.”
She no longer would have a home once the new doctor arrived, nor was she sure if she’d be allowed to stay on at Homeland if she wasn’t Obsidian’s official mate. “I need to use the phone to make some calls.”
“Why?”
She didn’t want him to freak out by mentioning it was possible that she’d be escorted off NSO land if they didn’t sign the papers. “I need to go over a few things with Justice or Fury. I have my stuff packed up but don’t know where it should go.” That wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t fully the truth either.
“It will go where you go, with me.”
Everything was black and white to him. It reinforced her belief that she was doing the right thing. Life wasn’t that simple. He’d learn that once the boundaries of his world were expanded.
“I’ll fix you lunch and make those calls while you eat.”
“You aren’t hungry?”
“No. I can’t eat as much as you do.”
He eased away from her and she released him, slipping off the edge of the island. “We’ll work on your cooking skills later. How about some sandwiches? I have chips too.”
Obsidian shadowed her as she prepared his early lunch. It was a good thing New Species provided groceries because it would cost a fortune to feed him in the outside world. Alli left him in the kitchen at the counter to go into her bedroom.
Her hands shook as she called the main office and asked to be transferred to Justice’s office. They put her right through to him.
“Allison? What can I do for you?”
“I’m really sorry about Obsidian’s behavior.”
“He’s newly freed. We expect aggression. You shouldn’t get between males in that situation. I could have handled him.”
She didn’t doubt that Justice North could fight but she didn’t want Obsidian to be hurt or worse, sent to Reservation. He wasn’t naturally antisocial but just hadn’t learned how to get along with others yet. “I wanted to talk to you about the mate papers.”
“They are being prepared and should arrive within the hour.”
She hesitated, debating her words carefully as she spoke softly, hoping her voice didn’t carry to the other room. “It’s too soon. He doesn’t understand that he has a lot more options than just being with me.”
“You don’t want to be his mate?”
“I do.” You have no idea how much. “I…love Obsidian but I’ve had months to spend with him and I’ve dated enough men to be sure what I want in one. All he ever had was a mate and now me.”
The silent response made her gut twist.
“I’m the first woman who has ever kissed him,” she whispered, her gaze locking on the doorway. “His experience is very limited, Justice. I don’t want him to regret mating me down the road when he meets other New Species women. He should have choices and the freedom to grow without locking himself into a permanent situation. As much as I want to spend the rest of my life with him, it wouldn’t be fair to take advantage of him. I would feel I’m doing that if I didn’t give him the opportunity to adjust to his new life first.”
“I understand and appreciate your candor.” He paused. “How limited is his experience? He had a mate. What do you mean, you’re the first female he’s kissed?”
She stood and gently eased her bedroom door closed and rushed into the closet to put another sealed door between her and Obsidian. New Species hearing was incredibly sensitive. It was a conversation she didn’t want him to hear.
“His mate only allowed him to touch her when she craved sex. She was in love with someone else before they met, from what he’s told me. She didn’t allow him to explore many sexual experiences. She’s the only woman besides me that he’s been with.”
Silence stretched again. “You want our females to offer to share sex with him?”
“No!” She hated the way that denial burst forth. “I mean, I don’t hope he sleeps with someone else… I love him but he should have those options available so he knows he has choices. I’m afraid he might be so serious about me because I’m all he knows. Does that make sense?”
“You’re not New Species.”
“I know that.”
He chuckled. “What I meant is that we know what we want and we wouldn’t care if someone we loved had options or not. We’re jealous by nature and possessive. I wouldn’t want to put my Jessie around other males to give them an opportunity to tempt her into their beds. I’d have to kill them.”
She closed her eyes and rested her forehead against the closet wall. “I just don’t want him to rush into anything, Justice. I am trying damn hard to do the right thing. Am I being stupid? I love him so much but I’m terrified I’m taking advantage if I agree to sign those papers. I want to.”
“You have a good heart and you are being selfless with your love. That’s a noble trait, Allison.”
“Are you going to order me to leave Homeland or can I stay with him despite us not being official mates? I’m asking for time with him. I know I don’t deserve it after what I did and that I’ve lost your trust. He wants me to move into the men’s dorm with him though and I am afraid he’ll attack anyone who comes to take me away.”
“Do you want to stay with him?”
“Yes.”
“You can’t work for us and your privileges will be stripped but you may stay. It means you will need an escort when you leave his quarters. Your phone access to the outside world will be monitored and limited. Can you live that way?”
It went against the grain to agree to those terms. She was a doctor who had worked hard to get where she had in her profession. It would mean giving up her career to sit around Obsidian’s home all day. His image flashed in her mind and she made a decision.
“Yes.”
“You do love him.”
“I really do.”
“I’ll make arrangements to have him and you moved there first thing in the morning. We were going to wait a week before settling him at the dorm but circumstances have changed now that he’s left Medical and wants you to live with him. The dorm will be more comfortable than one room at Medical. I’ll have them prepare one of the apartments and stock it for both of you.”
“Thank you.” She breathed a sigh of relief.
“It won’t be ideal. Your house is the only available space we have at the moment to give to a new employee and we can’t put the human doctor at the men’s dorm. They won’t be happy having a female living there but they won’t see you as a threat.”
“They would feel threatened by the new doctor?”
“Some of them would. He’s male and human. We don’t know him yet and trust hasn’t been earned. You have made friends here who are forgiving.” He paused. “We’ll move you both somewhere more fitting for a couple once something becomes available.”
“Thank you, Justice.”
“You’re welcome.”
She hung up and clutched the handset to her chest. She’d just agreed to be the equivalent of Obsidian’s housewife. “Shit,” she muttered. “I guess I better pick out a hobby or take up a craft or I’ll go insane fro