Lorn Read online

  “I don’t care that he was human. You let someone touch you.” He took a step forward but halted.

  “So what?”

  He snarled low but seemed to gain control of his temper. “You love me. I wasn’t wrong about seeing that yesterday, when I mentioned Lavos had found his mate. Your father told me the same thing when he argued that I shouldn’t be the one to feed you my blood.”

  She wasn’t going to lie. He’d seen too many emotions on her face when her guard had been down. “I couldn’t exactly have you, could I? You avoided me as if I had the plague.”

  He said nothing. Kira tried to guess why he’d be so angry since it didn’t make sense. He could have had her anytime he wanted. She decided to just ask.

  “Why are you so mad?”

  “You shouldn’t have allowed anyone to touch you when you have feelings for me.”

  A sense of disbelief swept through her. “That’s stupid.”

  His eyes widened.

  “Seriously? That’s why you’re pissed? What was I supposed to do? Stay a virgin forever since you wouldn’t have sex with me? Not live at all?”

  “Yes!”

  She shoved off the covers, furious now. Her legs trembled when she stood. “I know you guys are all full of yourselves and egotistical as hell but get with reality, Mr. Superior Half-Breed.” Her temper flared. “Did you expect me to cry myself to sleep every time you went to the other clans?” Memories flashed through her mind of doing exactly that. “You sure as hell aren’t a virgin!”

  He paled.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. Was I supposed to pretend I didn’t know why you were going on your little trips? How’s your girlfriend?”

  “I don’t have one.”

  “Girlfriends then.” She hated how it tore at her heart, and always had, knowing he was sleeping with those women. “Oh, of course. You’re supposed to test out a lot of sexual partners, trying to find your mate. Typical VampLycan stuff. Get over yourself, if you think I was supposed to just suffer in silence and never try to move on with my life. I dated and I slept with a guy, hoping to do just that!”

  He stalked across the room. The fluid way he moved never ceased to remind her that he was a predator. He paused when they almost bumped into each other.

  Lorn reached out and brushed a long strand of hair over her shoulder, his hand hovering close to her throat. “I’m jealous.”

  She was stunned.

  “I want to track him down and rip the heart out of his chest for daring to put his hands on you.” His irises lightened and began to glow again. “I’m furious that anyone has known your body. I’d love to watch him die for that offense.”

  Her mouth parted but she was mute, too confused to form words.

  “You should have told me if you had a need for sex, Kira. I didn’t think you’d inherited those traits from your father.”

  That jerked her out of the stupor. “What are you saying?”

  “I would have helped you, tended to your needs. I could have done that without entering you.” His lips compressed into a tight line and a muscle along his jaw jumped. “Did you consider that the human could have gotten you pregnant? Abused you in some way? You should have trusted me enough to tell me you were experiencing the heat.”

  “A sympathy fuck, minus the actual fucking?” She jerked away from his touch, wanting to slap him. “No thanks. It wasn’t my minimal Lycan blood putting me into heat and driving me to have sex with my boyfriend. Even humans crave sex, Lorn. They want to be touched and be intimate with another person. That’s natural. I’ve had a sex drive since I hit my mid-teens. It might not be as intense as what you experience but it’s still there.”

  “Sympathy? Is that what you think I feel?”

  “Yes! You always have! That’s why we became friends. You felt sorry for me.”

  “I have felt a lot of things for you.” His voice deepened and anger flashed in his electrified-looking eyes when they flickered. “Never pity.” He leaned in close and growled. “You’d run from me right now if you could read my mind.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “Do you know why I stopped spending time with you?”

  “You saw my breasts and got a hard-on.” She didn’t tiptoe around it. “It horrified you to have that reaction, so you avoided me.”

  “I stayed away because I couldn’t trust myself to get too close. I would have been on you faster than you could have screamed.” His breathing increased until his chest rose and fell rapidly. “I would have ripped off your clothes and been balls deep inside you. I wanted to fuck you so bad I didn’t trust myself. My control was good, but never when it came to you.”

  She let his words sink in. “Oh.” And yet, it wasn’t a total surprise. VampLycans had strong sex drives. She was a woman, after all.

  “I had nightmares about it.”

  That hurt. “I bet. The clan would have made fun of you relentlessly for lowering yourself enough to touch me.”

  He leaned in closer, growling. “Don’t. Go. There.” He glanced at her lips before staring into her eyes again. “I never gave a damn about what any of them thought. I was afraid I’d hurt you, Kira. I’d wake in cold sweats after having dreams about you, the sound of your crying tearing at my guts, knowing I was the reason.”

  “You wouldn’t have forced me, Lorn. You wouldn’t have had to. I wanted you.”

  He backed away a few inches. “You’ve never seen one of us having sex.”

  “Actually, I have.”

  He glared. “Who touched you?”

  “Give me a break! You guys love being outdoors. Nabby is quite the ladies’ man, it seems. He’s always doing it in the woods.”

  He curled his lip in disgust. “With one of our clan members?”

  “Try most of them. He’s got a spot down by the river that he takes them to. It also happens to be where I’m assigned to patrol sometimes. The guy is a real asshole and I’m pretty sure he gets caught on purpose. He’s lifted his head and smiled at me, putting on a show when I’ve come across him with some poor woman. It’s totally disgusting but I can’t exactly bust him for it. There’s no law that says he can’t fuck in the woods, even if it should be considered a public eyesore.”

  “Did what you see frighten you?”

  “Hell yeah.” She smirked. “I can’t believe anyone would be desperate enough to allow him to touch them. He must be really good at it because it sure isn’t his personality that’s the draw.”

  Lorn didn’t crack a smile. “I’m serious.”

  She sobered. “It was fucking, Lorn. I grew up in Alaska. Hello? Nature is all around us. You guys are a little rough, at least Nabby seems to be, but I’ve seen worse. He wasn’t tearing any of them up with his claws and no fighting was involved that ended in death. Real wolves can be brutal when both of them aren’t onboard with the sex thing.”

  He silently studied her.

  “Is the quiz over?” She glanced around, hoping to change the subject. She didn’t want to discuss sex with him anymore. It always triggered painful memories of him leaving to be with someone else.

  “I was afraid I’d hurt you.”

  “Get over yourself.” She turned, ready to lie down again. She was emotionally drained. “I have to think about my future. I waited a day too late to leave the clan.”

  His strong fingers gripped her arm, spinning her to face him. “What do you mean? Were you planning to leave? Where? Who was taking you away?”

  “My father offered to help me escape.” She avoided making eye contact. “It was a good time to go. Decker is gone and I doubt anyone else would have wasted the resources to come after me. They know I’d never reveal anything to the humans since it would put my dad in danger too.”

  “Look at me.”

  She raised her chin, staring into eyes. “What?”

  “The Vamp who did this to you is dead. I wanted you to know that.”

  “Good.”

  Lorn backed away and dropped his hands. “I wanted