All I Want Read online

  Zoe also hadn’t worn the little black dress. Because if the bingo dress reminded her of her failures, the LBD reminded her of the first time she’d been in Parker’s arms, and at the thought her resolve to go through with this nearly crumbled.

  She wasn’t ready to go on a date, and she knew it. But Kel had asked her to dinner and she needed to eat anyway, so she’d said yes. But she was determined to keep this casual, hence the dark jeans and a cute little knit top that gave her the aforementioned good boobs.

  “I’d be more excited,” Darcy said, “if the date was with the guy you fell in love with.”

  Parker had been a constant in her thoughts, but she’d made peace with all that had happened. She’d let it go.

  Okay, so she was pretending to let it go, but sometimes a girl had to fake it to make it. Easier said than done. She’d seen the cops drive by, checking on her, and she knew that was Parker’s doing. They were watching, making sure no one from Carver’s world came after her.

  She appreciated that but felt it unnecessary. She’d only been targeted because she meant something to Parker.

  And now that was no longer true. “We’ve been over this,” she said.

  “Right. You told him not to contact you, and that makes perfect sense.” Darcy nodded and then shook her head. “Wait—how does it make perfect sense again?”

  “His job—”

  Darcy snorted. “Screw the job. The job doesn’t matter. It’s about a guy’s character, his heart. And nothing says character and heart like a big, tough badass softening his hard edges for the woman he loves.” She spoke firmly, clearly knowing of what she spoke.

  And she did. She had AJ, a guy who loved Darcy for exactly who she was, warts and faults and all.

  Zoe loved that for Darcy, but she didn’t know if she’d ever be lucky enough to find such a thing for herself.

  The doorbell rang and she froze. Kel was here a few minutes early.

  Darcy gave her a long look. “Problem?”

  “Nope. Of course not. I’m just about ready . . .” Zoe looked around for something to do. Aha! Bonnie was struggling to get out of one of Zoe’s boots in the closet. Zoe rescued her, setting her on the bed next to where Oreo was snoozing. She then turned around, looking for the other heathen, and found him asleep on her T-shirt in the hamper.

  Parker’s T-shirt . . .

  Oreo lifted his sleepy head and licked his kitten with one huge tongue lap.

  Bonnie fell over.

  Oreo licked her again, and a rough, rumbling purr filled the room.

  “Good boy, Oreo,” Zoe said. “Watch the baby.”

  Darcy snorted. “You need real kids in the worst way,” she said.

  “Why would I need kids?” Zoe said. “I have you and Wyatt.”

  “You’re stalling,” Darcy said.

  Yes. Yes, she was. Determined, Zoe grabbed her purse and walked out. Her steps faltered as she passed the room where Parker had stayed. If she stepped inside and inhaled deeply, she could almost catch his scent, see him sprawled on the bed, smiling. Beckoning her with a finger crook . . .

  Closing her eyes, she turned away. They’d said all they had to say. Still, she had to rub the physical ache in her chest as she walked by. She hit the stairs, crossed the living room, and plastered a smile on her face.

  Then she opened the front door.

  Not Kel.

  It was Parker, hands up on the jamb above, looking tough and badass in mirrored lenses and no smile.

  Her heart skipped a beat. And then another. Not able to deal with what she was seeing, she placed her hands on his abs—rock hard, of course—and gave a little shove so that she could step out onto the porch and look around him to check the driveway.

  No Kel.

  “Looking for someone?” Parker asked her back.

  Her eyes drifted shut. She hadn’t seen him in a week, hadn’t heard his voice, but she was reacting to him as if he hadn’t left. “What are you doing here?”

  He didn’t answer until she turned to look at him. “Turns out, I forgot something,” he said.

  Thirty

  Parker’s heart had taken one good, hard knock against his ribs at the sight of Zoe, a punch to the system.

  “So what did you forget?” she asked, cool as a cucumber.

  Clearly she didn’t intend to make things easy on him. Zoe was a lot of things. Easy wasn’t one of them. Not that he deserved it, anyway. Nope, Zoe was tough on the outside, and though she’d deny it, on the inside she was sweet and warm and capable of such staggering emotion that she scared him to the bone. Right now, way on the inside. She wasn’t going to give an inch; she never did.

  He loved that about her. “You,” he said. “Zoe, I forgot you.”

  Not looking impressed, she crossed her arms. “I don’t buy it. You never forget a damn thing.” She looked at her watch. “And I don’t mean to be rude, but I’ve got plans.”

  “I get that. I had plans, too,” he said. “But things change.”

  She just stared at him. “What are you doing here, Parker?”

  It was a legitimate question, one that he’d asked himself only every hour or so since he’d last seen her.

  He’d gone home. Spent time with Amory. And with his parents. Things were going to be okay there; he’d been shocked and surprised. He’d been welcomed, and together they’d come up with a plan to allow Amory to have some more freedom. They’d all spent a whole twenty-four hours together and no one had raised their voice.

  Progress.

  From there it had been onward to D.C., where he’d gotten the shock of his life to find out he wasn’t fired. His job was still there if he wanted it. A month ago, hell yeah, he’d have wanted it, but he wasn’t that same guy. He’d never be that guy again. “I didn’t lose my job,” he said.

  She softened slightly. “I’m glad it worked out for you,” she said genuinely.

  “I resigned, Zoe.”

  She blinked. “What?”

  He’d walked away and then taken the job with the ATF. Right here in Idaho. He’d have cases much like he’d had for the FWS, but it would be regional. Close to home.

  He’d gone his entire adult life not wanting to be like his parents and yet in the end, that was exactly what he’d become. He’d visited with them for a day and realized something else—they had each other, always. He’d realized how much he wanted that, wanted to let someone in.

  Zoe.

  The job here with the ATF would challenge him and keep him on his toes, but there was a balance to be found between work and a personal life.

  And he’d found it.

  And then walked away from it.

  He’d been a boneheaded dumbass, and all he could do was hope that he wasn’t too late because when it came right down to it, all he really wanted was for Zoe to be his.

  And for him to be Zoe’s.

  The sound of a vehicle coming down the street had Zoe giving him another push. “You’ve got to go,” she said quietly. “I’ve got a date—”

  The car drove right by.

  “Kel’s not coming,” Parker said.

  “Why not?” She narrowed her eyes. “You messed it up somehow, didn’t you?” Giving up trying to push him away, she poked him in the pec. “You know that I manage to mess up these things all on my own. I don’t need your help. Dammit, I needed that date tonight, Parker. I needed it to get you off my mind. You had no right to—”

  “I’m your date, Zoe.”

  She blinked. “What?”

  “I’m your date tonight,” he repeated. And if things went okay in the next few minutes, he was hoping to be her date until the end of time.

  But she was shaking her head. “We don’t date. We just f—”

  He hauled her up to her toes and covered her mouth with his. He kissed her until she sagged against him, until she sank her fingers in his hair and wrapped herself around him with a soft moan that went straight through him. Only when they were both breathless did he pull back, just a fr