About That Kiss: A Heartbreaker Bay Novel Read online

  He rested his forehead against hers. “Molly’s leg and back. That’s all on me. All of it and worse.” He did his best not to think about that time in his life and he was good at it. He’d never told anyone about any of it. But this wasn’t just anyone—this was Kylie—and he drew in a ragged breath. “I was stupid.”

  She opened her mouth but he shook his head at her and put a finger over her lips. “Shh,” he said. “I’m going to tell you, but I don’t need you to defend my dumb ass.” He paused, remembering. “We lived in that shit neighborhood, and Molly . . .” He shook his head. “She’d drawn the attention of one of the asshole thugs hanging around. She was fourteen and I’d just turned seventeen. I’d gone along with the gang’s stupidity up until then because they promised if I did, they’d leave Molly alone. I believed them. I shouldn’t have. When they wanted me to steal a car and I refused, they took her. To persuade me.”

  “Oh Joe,” she whispered. “What did you do?”

  “I hunted them down and got her back. It took three days.” He hated thinking of those long minutes and hours and days, the utter heart-stopping panic over what might have been happening to Molly. “I finally found out where they were holding her. Just as I arrived, she somehow escaped out a third-floor window. She was perched on a ledge, desperately trying to reach a tree branch that wasn’t quite close enough.”

  Kylie stared at him. “I’m hoping that’s where the story ends, but somehow I know that it isn’t.”

  “She jumped for it and missed, and then fell to the ground,” he said. “She broke her back in two places. She’s had three surgeries but the nerves in her right leg are permanently damaged.”

  “Oh my God.”

  “She used to run track,” he said. “She wanted to be an Olympian. That was her dream. It was going to be her way out.”

  Kylie slid closer to him, pressing her body to his as if she knew he needed warmth, her warmth. Not that he deserved it, but he wasn’t strong enough to push her away, so instead he pulled her in close.

  “She told me it wasn’t your fault, Joe,” she murmured. “She believes it.” She tipped her head up to his. “And so do I.”

  She was giving him way more credit than he deserved.

  “So is what happened to Molly the reason why you tend to be so . . .” She trailed off.

  “Crazy?” he asked.

  “Well, I was going to say overprotective,” she told him with a small smile. “Is this why you won’t let me all the way in, because you’re afraid your lifestyle will get me hurt?”

  He stilled at her incredible—and accurate—assessment.

  “Joe . . .” She paused as if searching for the right words. “I get that you’re out there saving the world, trying to help people and maybe clean up your karma at the same time, but no one seems to think it needs cleaning except you. You’re too hard on yourself.”

  He knew that later he’d be going ten rounds with himself in his own head about this, about telling her the whole story. It was bringing it all back to the surface and it wasn’t a good time for that, not with the countdown on and only days left to figure her shit out.

  But Kylie wouldn’t understand that. She didn’t bother hiding her emotions like he did. She had no interest in keeping herself in control. And actually, her willingness to let go was one of the things he loved about her. There was just something incredibly appealing about how she put herself out there, not worrying about outcome or the possibility of getting hurt.

  Which made her the brave one, not him. Honestly, he had no idea why he even bothered to try to resist her. Resistance was futile with this woman who’d gotten under his thick skin when he hadn’t been looking. She thought he held back with her, but he’d been fooling himself because he wasn’t holding back at all.

  Just thinking about it made his chest tight. So did imagining her not being in his life. He’d learned firsthand what it was like to have her all to himself. He was getting used to sharing his free time with her, and his personal space. He even loved sleeping with her after they made love, holding her all night, allowing himself to give in to his selfish need to keep her close.

  All of which was forcing him to face a fact he hadn’t seen coming—his solitary life was starting to feel just a little too solitary.

  He knew he should walk away right now, before he got in any more over his head. But who the hell was he kidding? It was too late. He was already going down for the count.

  Kylie slid her hands beneath the hem of his shirt and paused with her fingers splayed wide over his bare skin.

  He went hard and sucked in a breath. “You know I can’t think worth a damn when you have your hands on me.”

  “Huh,” she said, not taking her hands off of him. “Didn’t know that.” She gave him an innocent look and bit her lower lip.

  With a groan, he hauled her in flush against him. He knew he’d given away how badly he wanted—actually, make that needed—her, because when their gazes met, the look in her eyes was enough to make his heart stop and his lungs run out of air.

  She needed him too.

  He stared into her face, searching for what, exactly, he had no fucking clue, before he closed his arms around her. Kissing her hard, he lifted her up, and when she wrapped her legs around him, he carried her to the bed.

  He tossed her down on it, leaving her free to gasp for air as he stripped and then crawled up her body, tugging off her clothes as he went. His emotions were a chaotic mix of things he couldn’t get a grasp on, though lust and passion were high on the list. When he’d condomed up and was poised between her legs, she tipped her head back, her eyes closing in anticipation of what was to come.

  “Kylie,” he said softly. “Look at me.”

  Her head came up and her eyes opened slowly. They were glazed with passion and he had to use all of his self-control not to dive into her right then. “Can you feel what you to do me?” He pressed into her lightly.

  She sucked in a sharp breath and nodded as her nails dug into his shoulders. “Yes.”

  “I’ll never get tired of this.” He pushed in another inch and bent to kiss her. “I’ll never get tired of how you make me feel.” He rolled his hips and slid all the way home.

  With a low moan, she wrapped her arms around his neck and tightened her legs on him. As he began to move, her hips rushed to meet his every thrust and when she came, she took him right over the edge with her.

  They were still gasping for air when his phone—from his pants somewhere on the floor—alerted him to an incoming text. He dropped his forehead to hers and concentrated on the only thing he could—breathing.

  “Maybe it’s nothing,” she said, her hands in his hair, her body still quivering beneath his.

  “Maybe.” But they both knew it wasn’t. He took the time to give her a soft kiss and then another. And another . . .

  She pulled free with clear regret. “You have to go,” she said.

  His laugh was short. “Story of our relationship.” He was halfway out the door when he heard her ask the room a question.

  “So we have a relationship now?”

  He glanced back, really hoping that was a rhetorical question. But she was looking to him for an answer.

  At whatever she saw on his face, a rough laugh escaped her. “Okay, so maybe not,” she murmured.

  Every woman he’d ever known including his own sister fought like this, with battles he never saw coming. And he’d never received a copy of the rule book. He wanted to keep walking out the door. He wanted that a whole lot more than he wanted to have this conversation, but this was Kylie. He couldn’t just walk away from her. Wouldn’t. He blew out a breath. “Kylie—”

  “No, wait,” she said. “Me first. I know I let you think I was okay with this, with just this physical thing between us. And I was. I really was.”

  His heart kicked hard. “But . . . ?”

  “But now . . .” She let out a long breath and shook her head. “Suddenly, I’m not.” She met his gaze, her