Out of the Blue Read online

  “But we both agreed this was only temporary, from the very beginning. I know, I remember.” She watched him very carefully. “Would you have wanted it to be...more?”

  “No.” But wasn’t that the kicker? He was no longer sure about that.

  CHAPTER 11

  “SO...DID YOU do the deed with Zach yet?”

  The three of them, Hannah, Alexi and Tara, were in the kitchen for their nightly ritual—junk food.

  Hannah stared at Alexi, thankful she’d already swallowed the last bite of her brownie, which was tonight’s dessert of choice.

  The three of them had been meeting like this since they’d opened the lodge. It was their favorite time of the day. Usually they discussed the comings and goings of the guests, or their employees, or even financial stuff, but mostly they just sat around and enjoyed each other and the peace and quiet.

  “Well? Did you?”

  “I don’t really want to talk about it,” Hannah said.

  “Really?” Alexi looked at her, shocked at the thought that one of them would hold out on good gossip. “Why not?”

  “Because...” Why not? “Because...”

  “Because you’re falling for him.”

  “Really? Let me see.” Tara came close and inspected Hannah’s face carefully. “Hmmm...not necessarily true,” she said over her shoulder to Alexi. “It could just be the triple decker ice cream she consumed for lunch, coupled with the five brownies she just inhaled.”

  “You’re saying that look is caused by sugar overload and not male overload?” Alexi asked.

  The two of them stood there discussing her, staring into her face, as if she wasn’t right there. Laughing, Hannah pushed them both away. “Go on, both of you. If you see anything in my eyes, it’s annoyance. At you. Good night.”

  She escaped, then leaned weakly against the kitchen door, staring at the curved staircase that led to the rooms.

  Was Zach up there?

  She realized she was holding her breath, and she slowly let it out, knowing it shouldn’t matter where he was.

  If only that was the truth.

  She forced herself to go directly to her room, where she wandered around until the knock came.

  To her shock, it was Zach, and he looked every bit as baffled and uncertain as she was. It was a good look on him though, and just seeing him made her hurt.

  When she just stared at him, he sent her one of his most irresistible grins. “The Schwartzes are watching, you know. Waiting to see how long it takes me to talk you into letting me in. You’re killing my reputation.”

  “You can’t come in,” she told him. “I might do something embarrassing, like throw myself at you.”

  He sent her a tight smile. “I’m fairly certain I’ve alienated you enough today so that my virtue is safe.”

  Unable to hold back her own smile at that, she stepped back. “Come in then. At your own risk, of course.”

  “Of course.” He moved past her, into the middle of the room, then turned back to face her. “I gave up my room.”

  “You...what?”

  “The inn is overbooked. Tara was downstairs tearing out her hair.”

  “Oh, poor thing. I need to go help.”

  “You worked a double shift already. She’s got it handled. But I gave up my room, and—” He sent her another one of his smiles, this one touchingly uncertain.

  Her heart tugged, which really annoyed her.

  “Is your couch still available?” he asked unexpectedly.

  “Is my—” She narrowed her eyes and studied him. “No.”

  “No?”

  “No.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because I’ll probably forget myself and look into your eyes, which will make me melt, dammit, and then the next thing I know we’ll be...you know, and quite frankly, Zach, my heart just can’t take it.”

  “Maybe I want you to melt.” He took a step toward her. “Maybe I’ve thought it all over and decided it doesn’t matter to me what got us together the other night, that I’m just glad it happened.” Another step, and her heart leaped. “Maybe I want it to happen again.” He took the last step between them. “And again.”

  He was standing before her now, his face tense, his entire body tense. “Maybe I think that Los Angeles isn’t that far away, that I think we should do whatever it takes to ride this thing through to the end.”

  She shook her head, suddenly, terribly, very afraid. “You swallowed too much sea water when you were surfing today. That must be it.”

  “Okay, you don’t believe me.” He nodded his understanding. “Hell, I hardly believe it myself. I can give you all the time you need to mull it over.”

  “You have only a few days left.”

  “That’s not necessarily true.”

  She looked at him, wary. “I don’t know what you mean. I thought you didn’t want to leave any loose ends.”

  The hurt in her voice was unmistakable, and his fault. “Hannah—”

  “No, I already know everything there is to know. Your job, your lifestyle, your everything, doesn’t leave room for any entanglements. Don’t you see? That’s what made it all okay for me, because I knew. At least at first, it was okay.” She sighed. “But afterwards, the truth stared me in the face. I was only kidding myself. I...I felt something more than just lust, and it scares me to death.”

  He knew the feeling, all too well. “Hannah...”

  “It can’t happen again.”

  Yes, he’d thought that, too. But he felt empty just thinking about it.

  Totally, completely, devastatingly empty.

  “Maybe I need more than a few more days to recover from the shooting,” he said softly.

  Her eyes were wide, still wary. “But you love your job.”

  “Yeah. But the job could wait. If it had to.”

  “Don’t do it. Don’t you dare do something like that for me.”

  “How do you know it would be for you?”

  “Wouldn’t it?”

  “Maybe it’d be for both of us.”

  “No.” There was more than a little panic in her voice. “Because you would eventually go back, and it would be worse then, so much, much worse. So just stop it, stop looking at me like that, like you really, really care, okay?”

  “Well, how about I don’t look at you at all?” He touched her then, slid his hands up her arms, then back down until just their fingers were connected. Slowly he pulled her close in a hug devastatingly easy and warm. “There.” He buried his face in the soft, vulnerable spot beneath her ear. “I can’t see you. Does that help?”

  He was teasing her, still smiling. Hannah could feel him against her skin, and there was no way she could turn him away. “Fine. Stay.” As if it didn’t matter, she shrugged, went into her bedroom and shut the door.

  Then she sat on her bed and stared at that shut door, her body and mind at war as to what they wanted from the man on the other side of it.

  * * *

  HOURS LATER Zach came awake to a low cry from the bedroom, followed by a soft thud. He was off the couch and through the door before he came fully conscious, hitting his knees on the floor in front of the thrashing lump by the bed.

  “Hannah.” She was flailing wildly in the dark, trapped in the blanket, which had fallen with her. “Hold still, I’ve got you.” It took him a moment to free her, but when she did, she surprised him, leaping to her feet.

  There was no light, only the faint moon, so he couldn’t be certain, but it seemed as though she was standing over him, chest heaving, glaring with fury.

  At him. “Hannah?”

  She shoved back her hair, her breathing ragged, and he reached out and flipped on the light.

  He immediately wished he hadn’t. She’d obviously had a nightmare. Her shirt was soaked through, plastered against her skin, which was shiny and lustrous. Her thighs, the ones he’d just been dreaming about having wrapped around him, quivered, and she hugged herself, all while shooting him with those menta