Awakened by the Giant Read online

  “I guess so.” She nodded and reluctantly opened her mouth.

  Calden popped the bite in and then waited to let her chew.

  Maddy did, her eyes widening as she finished and swallowed.

  “Hey, that’s really good! The purple stuff tastes kind of like scrambled eggs mixed with pancakes and the green chunks are like really firm bacon.”

  “I don’t know what those foods are, but I’m glad you’re enjoying your First Meal.” Calden smiled at her and Maddy found herself smiling back because it was such a rare expression on his usually-serious face. Also because it was such a sincere expression. She remembered how Pierce had smiled—that half-grimace he used to give her that didn’t ever reach his cold gray eyes. But when Calden grinned, it lit up his whole face and she could tell he was honestly and genuinely happy.

  Comparing the big Kindred to her dead husband brought her up short. For a moment, she wondered if she was going to cry again. But no tears came.

  Maybe I cried myself out last night, she thought. Or maybe it was because as more and more memories of her husband came back, she realized how far apart they’d grown before the end. Their marriage had been dying a slow, painful death for ages before they had blasted off in the Kennedy—they hadn’t really loved each other for the last five years.

  It was sad to think of, but Maddy couldn’t help feeling relieved in a way. Though she still felt the pain of Pierce’s loss, it was much easier to bear than if they’d loved each other deeply, as they had when they were first married.

  Before we lost our way and lost each other, she thought as she allowed Calden to feed her another bite of the strange, alien breakfast. As peculiar as it looked, it tasted pretty good and it was certainly better than the weird liquids the Mentats enjoyed consuming.

  It was nice of Calden to be so patient with her—and be willing to feed her—though it did make her feel a little like a dependent child. Their size difference, of course, didn’t help the situation. Maddy thought that he’d better not start making choo-choo noises and telling her to “open wide” while he guided the fork to her mouth or she would lose it.

  Not that he was likely to know any of the cultural norms she associated with feeding a kid, she thought with a sigh. She was the only one who knew those now and unless she had a child of her own someday (extremely unlikely since there was no one to make a baby with, except for Calden himself who was obviously much too large to have sex with) no one else ever would.

  Maddy pushed the thought away and wondered how she could pass the time while she waited for her hands to heal. She was already learning to do a few necessities on her own, without Calden’s help. For instance, when she’d woken up that morning, she’d had an instant and urgent need to use the restroom. It seemed strange, on reflection, that she hadn’t had to go at all the day before but at the moment, the need was too great to consider it much. But though she was willing to let the big Kindred feed her and dress her, Maddy was damned if she’d allow him to help her in the ladies room.

  Luckily, he had a toilet that wasn’t unlike what she was used to and it had a kind of bidet feature on it for cleaning up afterwards. It sent up a stream of water to clean you which it followed with a blast of hot air to dry the area in question—a completely hands-free operation.

  It was too big, of course and Maddy had to balance carefully to avoid falling in but once she got the hang of it, she was able to work it pretty well. The buttons on it were motion sensitive so all she had to do was wave a forearm or elbow over them to get the thing to work. It took her a little longer than it would have with functional hands but she didn’t care about that—she was just grateful to be able to handle her business in privacy.

  Although what I’m going to do if I get my period before my hands start working, I have no idea, she thought, opening her mouth obediently for another bite as Calden fed her. He was feeding himself as well, eating from an identical pile of fluffy purple mounds and green cubes as he alternated a bite for her and then a bite for him.

  “Thank you for this,” Maddy said, after swallowing her current bite.

  “Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow questioningly over a large silver mug while he sipped something that steamed and smelled spicy and sweet.

  “For feeding me—for being patient with me and letting me cry all over you again last night,” she said by way of explanation. “For not leaving me alone and for saving me in the first place. I know I’m a lot of trouble to you. You’re a scientist—you don’t need to be babysitting me while you’re trying to do your research.”

  “You’re no trouble at all,” he assured her. “I’m sorry you feel such pain and loss.” His topaz eyes became shadowed.“I wish…I hope…I may be able to help you through it.”

  “Thank you,” Maddy whispered and her throat felt too tight to swallow. She shook her head when he offered her another bite. “Can I have something to drink instead?”

  “Would you like to try some of my chewl?” He held out the steaming silver mug to her. “It’s a bit spicy but it’s also a strong stimulant—I find it clears my head when I first wake in the morning.”

  “Sounds like coffee.” Maddy shrugged. “Sure—I’ll try it.”

  He held it carefully to her lips, reminding her that it was hot, and she took a small sip and then a bigger one.

  “Mmm!” She smiled at him when he took the mug away. “That’s good! Kind of like melted red-hots. And really sweet.”

  Calden looked guilty.

  “I fear I have a weakness for sweets. I know I put much too much sweetener in my chewl but I can’t seem to break myself of the habit.”

  “Well, it hasn’t done you any harm that I can see,” Maddy remarked, letting her eyes rove over his tall, muscular body. He was wearing another pair of black trousers with his lace up boots and another black sleeveless t-shirt which clung to his sculpted abs and showed off his well-muscled arms.

  “You’re very kind.” Calden nodded gravely. “Would you like some more?”

  She shook her head.

  “What I’d mostly like now is a shower. Um…” She bit her lip. “But I’m not sure how I can take one on my own.”

  “You can’t—not in your present state,” Calden said frankly. “And I take it you object to having me shower you as I did yesterday?”

  “Yesterday was an exception because I had slime all over me,” Maddy pointed out.

  “A water shower isn’t something you can have everyday anyway,” Calden remarked. “As I’m sure you know, water is a precious resource aboard a space station and I actually used considerably more than my daily allotment getting you clean yesterday.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry!” Maddy exclaimed. “I didn’t know I was using all your water.”

  He shook his head. “Please don’t feel bad—it was necessary to get the nutrient bath out of your hair and, uh, body…” he cleared his throat, “In order to make sure you were healthy and well. But today I think we’d better use the enzyme baths.”

  “Enzyme baths?” Maddy frowned. “That doesn’t sound too safe.”

  “It is as long as you take a few simple precautions,” Calden assured her. “And it gets you cleaner than plain water ever could.” He frowned. “But I think we’d better wait a little while until the baths clear out. The reaction of the Mentats to you so far has not been…positive.”

  Maddy snorted. “That’s an understatement. So the baths are communal?”

  He nodded. “They are. And most of the Mentats go in the morning. If we wait about an hour, most of them will be at work in their respective labs and stations and we should have the baths to ourselves.”

  “Sounds good to me.” Maddy sighed. “So I guess I just sit here for an hour with my hands soaking in the slime?”

  “That’s not necessary. I’ve instructed the simulator to make you some travel gloves to wear so you can move around freely.” Calden got up from the small table they were sharing. “Let’s see if they’re finished.”

  He went to on