Love and Lists Page 37


“Holy hell, make that eleven out of eleven women,” I moan as he holds the bullet in place and slowly starts to move inside me.

It only takes me thirty seconds to have my first orgasm with a guy. And not just any guy–Gavin. And luckily, he doesn’t take after his best friend and shout the names of My Little Pony when he comes during sex; he just shouts my name.

Chapter 17 – Numb Vagina

“I want to try something,” Gavin tells me later that night as we lie curled up together on his bed.

All in all, losing my virginity went pretty well, if I do say so myself. There was no awkward silence after it was over and nothing felt weird at all. It just felt … right. Everything feels right, aside from the fact that I had sex with my best friend and I haven’t come clean yet about what I did to get us to this point. Gavin assumes I broke up with Rocco. Gavin doesn’t know Rocco is my g*y fake boyfriend and that I used Rocco just to make him jealous. How in the hell does one even start an admission like that? I need more time to figure this out before I tell him. Not a lot of time, just enough to make him fall madly in love with me and not care about the fact that I deceived him.

Gavin’s palm runs up the inside of my thigh and I forget all about my fake boyfriend.

“I’m pretty sure you already tried that and it was a success.” I laugh as he pushes my skirt out of the way and runs his fingertips along the edge of my underwear.

Kissing my cheek, he scoots his body down the bed and situates himself between my legs with his chin resting on my thigh. I watch his face as he stares at his fingers that continue to lightly skim over my underwear. My breath catches at his fierce concentration. He places a kiss on the inside of my thigh and then kisses his way up my leg, his fingers working their way under the edge of my underwear.

“What are you doing?” I whisper, following it up with a soft moan when he pulls my underwear to the side and then presses his lips right to my clit.

“Shh, just close your eyes,” he tells me.

I have no choice when I feel his tongue dart out and circle me. My eyes close automatically and I arch my back as he licks me slowly.

So this is what I’ve been missing all these years. Holy Jesus.

He flattens his tongue and adds more pressure as he laps at me, like he’s licking an ice cream cone. A vagina-flavored ice cream cone. Dairy Queen should put that on their menu. I would buy one for Gavin every single day.

He leans in closer and his lips join his tongue as he sucks and licks at me. It feels amazing … for about ten seconds. And then something weird happens. I know he’s still down there because I’ve opened my eyes and I’m staring right at the top of his head between my legs, but suddenly, I don’t feel him there anymore. I see his head moving, I witness his tongue darting out every few seconds as he goes to town on me, but I feel nothing. This isn’t a dream is it? One of those weird wet dreams where you’re just about to come and then wake up? What the f**k is going on?

Bringing my hands up to my face, I rub my palms roughly against my eyes, pulling them away and looking back down between my legs.

Okay, I’m awake and this isn’t a dream. Am I suddenly paralyzed from the waist down? Oh holy shit, I’ve just gone paraplegic! I read about that happening to a woman in Brazil. She was just sitting there at the dinner table when all of a sudden she couldn’t feel her legs, and now she’s in a wheelchair. I DON’T WANT TO BE IN A WHEELCHAIR THE REST OF MY LIFE! Can o**l s*x cause paralysis?

Glancing over to the nightstand next to Gavin’s bed, I see my iPhone. He’s still busy so it’s not like he’s going to notice if I pull up Google on my phone. I can wiggle my toes so it can’t be that bad.

Damn, I need a pedicure. I should schedule one for tomorrow.

I haven’t made any encouraging noises in a few minutes; I should probably do that so Gavin doesn’t think anything is amiss. I don’t want him to never do this again. The first couple of seconds were mind-blowing. Maybe that’s how o**l s*x is. You have to build up your tolerance for it. Maybe next time he does this, I’ll feel it for thirty seconds. Then after that, a full minute.

Fuck, why did I put my phone so far out of reach?

“Oh yeah, just like that,” I say, trying to keep the boredom out of my voice.

Do you have to wait a certain amount of time between orgasms? Maybe it’s like swimming after eating. Lifting my arm up, I check my watch. It’s been two hours since my last orgasm. Is that too soon to have another one?

“You taste so good, baby,” Gavin says in between licks.

“Um, thanks?” I mutter.

It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy that he called me baby. Too bad that warmth doesn’t travel to my vagina. What if it’s broken? Did we break it when I lost my virginity?

“Mmmmm, yeah,” I add in a breathy voice so he doesn’t stop.

I’ve heard girls say that in  p**n os when they’re getting oral. That sounds about right. I don’t want to tell him to stop. What if he thinks I don’t like what he’s doing? I’m assuming I would like what he’s doing if I could feel it. He’s got a great tongue and he knows how to use it. I think.

Did I remember to turn off my straightening iron at home? Mom will kill me if I left that thing plugged in again.

Pretending like I’m really into this, I moan some more and start moving my hips, angling myself closer to the nightstand at the same time. Reaching my arm out slowly and making sure he’s still preoccupied with my broken vagina, I grab my phone.

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