Decebel's hands shook as he took Jennifer's pillow and pulled it to his face. He pulled in a deep breath and took a small amount of comfort from the warm vanilla and cinnamon that seeped into his very being.

His mind wandered to a time long ago when his heart had been held by another woman, young and full of life and spunk just like his mate. Cosmina had been a joy to all around her and he had lost her. He hadn't thought his heart would ever heal from the loss of his sister. But then he'd met Jennifer, his mate. She filled the hole in him and poured life where death had slowly begun to take over. Now he didn't know where she was, didn't know if she was okay.

Decebel's heart broke and his wolf pushed forward as a mournful howl poured from the very depths of his soul. As he took slow breaths, trying to calm his wolf and pull himself together, he could feel his wolf reaching, seeking the bond between them that had yet to truly solidify. His shoulders slumped.

“Have you any idea how long I’ve waited for you?” His mind reached of its own accord.

“I’ve only just found you and now I’m losing you.”

Then in the silence Decebel heard her.

Chapter 31

Jen could feel something warm and sticky running into her eyes. She reached up to wipe it away and a sharp pain pulled a gasp out of her. It was pitch black, she couldn't even see her hand in front of her face.

“Crap,” she growled. She realized then that she'd probably broken her arm. She moved experimentally and felt a stabbing pain in her side. Jennifer thought for a second, trying to remember what little she could from ER.

Okay, pain in the side, hard to breath. Probably broke a rib, maybe punctured a lung. Excellent.

She rolled to the side and was able to raise her other arm to her head. She felt a gaping wound, one that was pouring blood down her face and into her eyes. She tried to apply pressure, knowing she needed to try to stop the flow. She was weak, and getting weaker.

“Have you any idea how long I’ve waited for you?”

Abruptly, Jen sat up and nearly screamed from the pain that ripped through her body. Not possible, she thought.

“I did not just hear that,” she spoke into the darkness. She closed her eyes and waited to see if she would hear more of the voice that she needed to hear as much as she needed air to breathe. Her heart pounded in her chest, her breathing was shallow, and despite the cold, she could feel sweat trickle down her neck.

“I’ve only just found you and now I’m losing you.”

She let out a slow breath, savoring the sound in her mind. Finally, she thought as tears streamed down her cold cheeks, mingling with the blood that continued to flow. Finally.

“Decebel?” she sent hesitantly.

“Jennifer?” Decebel’s voice was urgent, firm.

“You can hear me?” she asked him, still unable to believe that they were speaking through their thoughts. She had dreamed, wished, hoped, and longed for this to happen.

“Bloody hell. Yes, I can hear you. Whereare you? What happened?”

“I don’t know where I am,” she told him, trying to remember what had happened. “It’s dark...and cold. The ground feels like rocks and dirt.”

“Jennifer, what happened?” he asked her again.

“It’s Marianna, Decebel. She made some sort of deal with Thad. Decebel –” her voice grew stronger as she began to remember what happened, Marianna pushing her into a hole in the earth. Pouring urine on her, now that was something Jen could honestly say she would have never had happen her life. My how her expectation of life had suddenly changed. “Fane and Jacque, they’re in danger. Thad wants them all dead. You have to protect them.”

“I have to find you,” Decebel insisted.

“No! You have to protect them. If something happens to Fane, Jacque will die. The same with Vasile and Alina. Decebel, you have to make sure they are safe,” Jen pleaded.

“I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU TO DIE!” he roared at her through their bond. “Do

not ask this of me, Jennifer. I will not lose you. I can’t.” The last came out as a near whisper.

“Decebel, we aren’t bonded. If something happens to me you can go on and have a life. Jacque can’t. If Fane dies, she goes with him. That’s not acceptable. I will not take her life for mine, do you hear me?”

Tears streamed relentlessly down her face as she tried to make him understand that she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if something happened to Jacque or Sally.

“Bonded or not, Jennifer, you are my mate. What you ask goes against everything I am. I cannot put others in front of your well being. You ask for a river to reverse its flow and the fires of hell to freeze over. It isn’t possible.”

Decebel’s voice was becoming more and more of a growl as he tried to make her understand that as her mate, he would not abandon her.

“I understand. This is hard for me, too. I love you, Decebel. I’ve loved you from the moment I met you. I love you bossy, mad, gentle, affectionate... I love you any way you come to me. I want us to have a chance, and I have to believe that the fates aren’t so cruel as to only give us this one. I have to believe that if we aren’t together in this life, then in the next.”

Jen tried hard to make her voice strong. She wasn’t going to pretend that the idea of never seeing Decebel again didn’t hurt worse than any pain she had ever experienced. She would rather be back in that burning car, feeling her flesh be seared, than think there was no chance to be with him. “If I have to, then I will believe enough for the both of us. But Decebel, if you come for me, I will never forgive you, mate or not. If you love me, clichéd as that is, you will protect those I love. And if this life is over for me, then live for both of us, and I will wait for you. I will see you again. I will kiss you, I will touch you, I will love you, Decebel. If not on this side, then on the other.”