Find You in the Dark Page 18


Clay reached over and squeezed the hand that sat clenched in my lap. “Mags. It's okay. I understand. I want them to be cool with us hanging out. I'll meet them.” He assured me. I let out a breath and sighed with relief. He made me feel like less of a tool, and I appreciated that.

“Thanks.” I said quietly. Clay smiled. “No, thank you, Maggie. For today. I can't remember the last time I had so much fun.” I felt warm at his compliment. He took a deep breath. “The last few months have been really tough and sometimes I forget that it's okay to let loose and just live life, you know. I have a feeling, you'll be really good for me.” The look he gave me made me tingle to my toes.

“I hope so.” I said. Clay gave me a coy smile. “Oh, I know so.” He replied.

Chapter Five

If I could have cut off my legs, I would have. Every muscle from the waist down ached and I couldn't suppress the groan as I sat down at my usual lunch table. Rachel looked up from her phone and tried to hide the smile on her face.

“What?” I growled, slowly swinging my legs around as I situated myself oh, so carefully. Rachel spooned some pudding into her mouth and shook her head. “Nothing.” She mumbled around her food. I glared at her. Daniel wasn't so discrete. “Why are you moving like an old lady, Mags? You look ridiculous.” I picked up a potato chip and chucked it at him.

“Coach Kline made me run this morning because I didn't show up for practice a couple of days this week. He was kind of pissed.” I leaned down and rubbed my calf muscles, trying to alleviate the burning sensation.

I understood why Coach was mad. I was his star runner and I had disappointed him. We had our first meet coming up on Friday and I had blown off practice three times this week. I felt guilty for shirking on my responsibility. But, I couldn't regret using the time to get to know Clay instead.

We had gone “exploring” a few more times. We had gone hiking at Crooked Run National Park, played mini golf in Warminster and seen a movie at the IMAX theater in Charlottesville. I loved spending time with Clay. For the first time, my life felt interesting, exhilarating even.

I found myself doing things and trying things that I never would have done before. Like eating Thai food and watching a foreign movie with subtitles. Okay, that may not seem like a lot...but I would never have thought to do any of that stuff until Clay came along.

“You blew off practice? Seriously?” Daniel asked incredulously. Rachel looked out the window behind her. “Is it snowing?” She asked in mock surprise. “Hardee, har, har, you two.” I got what they were saying. Me doing something outside of my norm was unheard of. I went along, doing my thing, not deviating. Which is why until three weeks ago, I was hopelessly and utterly bored.

Now...well, I looked forward to getting out of bed.

“Where the heck have you been slinking off to then?” Daniel seemed really confused by this. I understood his surprise. Typically if I wasn't at a) school, or b) home, I was with he and Rachel. Me developing a life outside of them was just weird. Like the earth had been thrown off of it's axis.

“Well, I...” I started, but was cut off by a voice behind me. “Mind if I sit with you guys?” I turned around- (very carefully of course, sore muscles here-) and saw Clay standing there with his lunch tray. He gave me a small smile, his eyes flicking to Rachel and Daniel.

This was the first time I had seen him in the cafeteria since the Paul Delawder incident. I quickly looked at my friends. Rachel had her mouth hanging open and Daniel was frowning. Neither of them spoke. Geesh. Rude much?

I pulled out the chair beside me. “Have a seat.” Clay sat down and put his tray on the table. He looked at me. Just like every time our eyes met, I felt my face flush. I swallowed and then turned to Rachel and Daniel. “Rachel, Daniel, this is Clay. Clay these are my friends Rachel Bradfield and Daniel Lowe.” Clay gave them a shy smile. “Hey.”

Neither of my friends said anything. They seemed to be a bit taken aback by Clay's appearance at our table. How humiliating! “Say hi, you two. Or he'll think you never learned to talk.” I rolled my eyes and Clay smiled tightly. I could tell he was uncomfortable.

Rachel blinked rapidly, the way she did when she was caught doing something embarrassing. “Sorry, Clay. Nice to meet you.” She gave him an overly bright smile. I frowned at her and silently communicated to her to stop trying so hard. Daniel looked at Clay almost as though he were examining him. “Hey.” He replied back.

Okay, well it looked as though Daniel would be a hard sell. He was so territorial sometimes. Clay cleared his throat and started eating his lunch. The vibe around our table became really tense. “So, how's your day so far?” I asked Clay, trying to cut through the thickening silence. Clay shrugged, not looking at me. “Just another day.” He said before returning to his lunch.

Wow, this was getting bad and fast. If he didn't want to talk, why the hell did he sit down? Of course it didn't help that Daniel was watching him while he ate. I shot daggers at my best friends, urging them with my eyes, to snap out of it.

Rachel sat up straighter and opened her eyes dramatically at me. “Sorry” she mouthed. I pointedly looked at Clay, who was shoveling salisbury steak into his mouth. “So, Clay. Did you finish that assignment for Creative Writing? I'm having a hell of time writing my short story. I think I got a whole paragraph before I gave up.” Rachel said, laughing in that really fake way of hers. At least she was trying.

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