My phone kept beeping, but I pushed it aside when the website came up. I searched for Mason Kade and baseball bat. Too many links came up, making me nauseous, but I clicked on the first one. My hands were so sweaty. I held my breath.

Loud yelling and curses filled my room. I jumped from the intensity. Then the camera was shaking as someone ran with it. A guy yelled in the background, he was clearer than the others. He must’ve been closer to the camera. “WATCH OUT!”

Someone screamed out in an angry growl and a loud whoosh sound happened next. The camera shifted and Mason was front and center. He had the baseball bat in his hands, winding up to swing. Hatred was dark over his face. His lips were curled in a furious scowl, and then he swung. There was no hesitation, and the camera watched as he hit the back of a guy’s head.

The camera rattled. “Holy shit!”

The guy dropped to the ground and Mason moved on. Suddenly the lens zoomed in and a close up of Mason’s hands was shown next. He tightened his grip and started to swing again.

Then there was nothing.

The image blurred to a frozen stop and the screen went black. Other images filled the screen; they were other clips that I might want to view next.

Vomit burst up, and I ran to the bathroom. One of my hands held it in until I stopped over the toilet. Then I spewed it out. It went everywhere, on the toilet seat, on the rim, on the wall, over my toilet paper. I groaned and held myself up. My stomach rumbled and my throat convulsed. I threw up three more times until I was weak and my eyes had tears in them.

After I cleaned everything up and made my way back to the computer, I slid into the seat and stared at the screen. I’d grown numb. Maybe it was the vomiting, maybe it was shock. I had no idea, but I was frozen. I sat there, staring at the screen. It might’ve been an hour, maybe a few minutes, until I heard a thumping sound. Then I looked down and saw my hand.

It wound up and slammed down on my leg. It went back up again and hit back down. Then again and again. The thumping sound was me. I was hitting my leg. My eyelid twitched and my lip trembled. A bruise was forming where I hit, but I couldn’t stop it. I didn’t want to stop it.

I gasped for breath and swung my head around. I blinked back more tears and tried to force myself back to reality. I was held suspended somewhere else. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t stop my hand. My heart was racing. I gasped again. Pain seared through me. It felt like something was on my chest.

I wondered if I needed to throw up again.

Everything was detached from me. It was me. I was detached.

And then I heard a small sound in the background. It sounded so far away, but my head swung down. My phone was lighting up again, inches from where I sat. I saw it was from Adam and tried to grab it. My hands were clumsy. They dropped the phone twice before I fumbled it to my ear and grated out, “Yeah?”

“….you okay…”

“What did you say?”

I couldn’t hear over my heartbeat.

“…Sam?...”

“What?”

His voice grew clearer this time. “Are you okay? Do you want me to come over?”

“Adam?”

“Yes.” He seemed to be yelling. “Are you okay? Where are you?”

“At the house.” I looked towards my door. Was he there? How had he gotten in?

“No one’s there. It’s all dark. What house are you at?”

“Are you here?” My heart wouldn’t stop racing. I needed it to calm down. I didn’t want to die.

“Sam.” Adam spoke in an assertive voice. “Mark and I are outside Garrett’s house. Are you there?”

“I’m at the mansion.”

“Can we come there? Is Mason there?”

“No.”

“We can’t?”

My tongue felt funny. Why did it feel funny? “You can. I think.”

He sighed. “Are you alone there?”

“I think so.” I looked at the hallway, but no lights shone from underneath it. My mom had called from the station and Mason hadn’t come in yet. That meant none of them were home, right? Things weren’t making sense to me anymore.

“Okay. We’re coming there. Meet us at the door?”

“What? Oh sure.” Wait. I tried to clear my head. Oh—they didn’t like people in their home. I rasped out, “You should go to the basement. Remember the door in the divider wall?” I couldn’t believe I was making sense.

“Yeah. I remember. Mark’s been there before.”

I frowned. Adam sounded so normal. Didn’t he know?

When I stood my knees buckled and I grabbed onto the desk for balance. I couldn’t fall down. Mason wasn’t there to catch me. So I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I fought against everything in me until I felt strength surge through my legs again. I could stand again.

It seemed to take forever until I opened the door for them. Adam and Mark both gave me grim smiles. Each raked me over for a moment and then Adam pulled me in for a hug. He held me tight for a moment before Mark grabbed me from him. He swung me in the air. “You okay, Sam? How are the guys?”

I gulped when he set me on my feet. “You know about the clip?”

They nodded.

Adam touched my arm. “Where are they?”

I swallowed over a knot. “They’re at the police station. I haven’t heard anything from him. I’m…that’s not what happened. In that clip, how it looks like.” I shook my head. “It’s not what happened. It was self-defense. Mason was defending them. There were fifteen guys against them.”

They shared a look and Adam spoke in a gentle tone, “We figured.”

“Oh.” My shoulders loosened. “Really?” My feet still wavered, but I forced myself still. “You believe me?”

“Yeah.” Mark’s eyebrows were high. “Have you seen them fight? For them to get beat that bad, there had to be a lot of guys.”

“Oh.”

Adam grinned. “We’re not here to judge ‘em. We’re here for you. We were concerned.”

I held my hands against my stomach. Why was it always filled with dread? “Thanks, guys.”

Mark shrugged. “Yeah, that and your mom called your dad, who called my mom. He said he was concerned for you since you were alone. That was all we needed to hear. We took off before she hung up the phone.”