I shake my head.

“That this was it. That I would lose whatever this was. I can’t stop thinking about you. The minute I saw you, I knew I had to have you. I was so mad that I was going to lose you.”

“That’s crazy,” I say as I wipe my eyes.

“So are we. I’m crazy about you, Charlie. I can’t explain it. It’s ridiculous, because half the time I don’t even like you.”

I laugh and so does he.

Tenderly, Mark takes my head between his palms. His thumb wipes a lingering tear. “I understand doing a job that sometimes causes you to question your morals. I don’t like it. I don’t appreciate knowing my friends were hurt and you were a part of it, but I get it. I want us to try.”

I let go of my training. I let the wall crumble and become ash. My heart is what I’m listening to this time, and my heart wants Mark Dixon.

“I want that too, but this won’t be easy.”

“Nothing worth anything is ever easy.”

He leans in and places his lips to mine ever so gently. I melt into him. This time will be different. I’m giving myself to him. A part of me will be vulnerable to Mark, and as much as it scares me, it also gives me hope. This is something no other man will have ever had. I can only pray he understands how much I’m offering.

Mark’s lips press against mine. We move together, both of us releasing all that just happened. My heart feels light, free, and optimistic. I know if I let go completely, I’ll fall in love with him.

His tongue and mine collide, and all the tenderness is gone. It’s the way I need him. It’s the way we are . . . a battle. He pulls his lips away, and the feel of his rough fingertips against my lips enables my mind to float. His hand slides slowly downward. I savor his touch. I pull his mouth back to mine—it’s a needed distraction from how good this feels. His other hand grips my hair and he pulls my head to the side. The bite of pain from my scalp only turns me on.

“I’m going to drive you to the brink,” he warns. His lips brush against my ear lobe before he pulls it in his mouth. Then his tongue glides across my neck to my shoulder. He repeats the motion, but this time kisses and sucks along the way.

My legs move. They need the friction. “Mark . . .” I moan his name as his teeth scrape against my shoulder. He bites down, and my back bows off the bed. “Oh, my God!”

“I want to hear you, Charlie.” Mark demands as his hand squeezes my breast. “I want to hear every fucking sound you try to hold back.” He pulls my top and bra lower and then runs his tongue around my breast. “You and I, we’re fire, baby. And I’m about to burn you to the ground.”

I don’t have words. All I feel is heat from his mouth. He sucks, squeezes, and massages my breast before he moves to the other. I’m bound by my own shirt. His lips never leave my skin as I liquefy beneath him. Every cell in my body is screaming his name. I’ve felt passion. I’ve had unbelievable sex. But this . . . this is something else. This is life. This is air. This is heaven, and I never want to go back to Earth.

“Take me,” I beg. I actually beg.

“Not yet.” He moves lower, pushing my shirt up. I help him by removing it.

The desire to touch him overwhelms me. I want to lose myself in him as well. “I want to feel your skin.”

“We’re partners, beautiful. Everything about this time is equal.”

I don’t know how to do equal. I’ve always been in charge, but I suspect the same is true for him. We’re both in uncharted territory. It’s a new country. A new language for both of us.

“Then let me participate.”

Mark leans on his haunches. He removes his shirt, exposing every perfect inch of his chest. I allow my fingertips to touch him, to remind myself that he’s real. We’re real. His arms cage me in even as he keeps his weight off me. “By all means, participate.”

I push him onto his side and straddle him. The penetrating way he gazes at me makes my stomach clench. His eyes burn with heat, his lips part, and his breath comes in shorter bursts. “How bad do you want me?” I ask. This could be fun. “Do you want to touch me?”

“Are you sure you want to play this game?”

I lean down and allow my nipples to brush against his chest. “I think we’re done playing, don’t you?” I lick the shell of his ear. “Besides, we know I always win.”

Mark lets out a throaty chuckle. “Beautiful . . .” He grips my hair and pulls my head back. “You were never playing in the same league.” He flips me back so fast my head spins. “Now it’s time you get in some practice.”

“Is that so?” I love that we can argue during sex. He pushes me as much I push him. “Then, by all means . . .” I get comfortable.

“First, you have to warm up.” He smirks as he unbuttons my shorts. “I wouldn’t want you to get injured.”

“Of course not.”

His eyes remain trained on mine as he pulls them off. I lie at his mercy, unafraid of giving him a little control.

“I need to look you over, get the lay of the land so to speak.” His brow rises.

I giggle. I actually giggle. I wasn’t even sure I knew how to giggle.

Mark seems to take notice. “Cute.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”

His eyes turn intense as the green deepens. “Where would you like me to kiss you?”

I lean onto my elbows as a challenge. “I think you should start at my breasts.”

“You have perfect tits,” he acknowledges before his mouth is otherwise occupied.

My head falls back as Mark licks around my nipple. He takes it between his teeth and pulls back. The jolt shoots straight to my core. “Fuck!” I surrender to the pleasure. I’m unable to keep quiet.

Mark’s mouth stops and his eyes lock on mine. “What now? Tell me what you want me to do to you.”

That he’s giving me any control this time says it all. We’re equals. There’s no surrendering, just giving. “Touch me.”

“Where, Charlie?”

“My clit.”

He slides my shorts and underwear off without pause. Everything about him right now is downright sexy. The way he moves, the things he says, the way his eyes darken when he looks at me. The funny thing about becoming invisible is that sometimes I worry I’ll disappear. That no one will even notice I’m gone. I go through periods of time when only two people would actually know. When I’m with Mark, I’m not in the shadows. It’s as though he sees nothing but me. He brings me into the sun to stand beside him.

With care, Mark pulls my legs apart. He hoists each one over his shoulders. “Mark,” I say.

His lips turn up. “You didn’t tell me how to touch you, so I’m using my judgment.”

Before I can reply his tongue gives a long hard swipe. “Oh, God.”

He repeats it again, and my eyes roll back. His hands under my ass lift me closer as he delves in repeatedly. I burn. A sheen of sweat forms across my body as I pulse and tense. He circles my clit over and over, applying pressure before he lightens it when I get close.

Mark inserts a finger as he sucks and then gently bites on the bundle of nerves. I want to cry, scream, explode, but he keeps me hovering over the breaking point.