So was free porn, but Jupe didn’t feel like explaining this to a being who didn’t understand the meaning of privacy. “What is it now?”

“Did you know our mistress carries your father’s offspring in her belly?”

“What the hell are you talking about now, birdbrain? Are—” Jupe stopped in mid-sentence. He stared at the gray-skinned creature as realization dawned. “Cady’s pregnant? You’re a big fat liar.” Had to be. She didn’t look pregnant. And she’d tell him and his dad before she told some stupid servant creature from another plane.

“I saw the threads with my own eyes a day ago. The Kerub’s seed is growing within her.”

Seed? Gross. He did not want to think about that. And what was more, if Cady was pregnant, how was she going to do her job? He’d never seen a pregnant bartender. And if she was pregnant, that meant—

“I’m going to have a brother? Or a sister?”

“Not if Enola finds out. Our mistress’s mother is a murderer. She will slaughter the child or take it from her if our mistress does not find the Moonchild spell and reverse it. Do you understand?”

Jupe barely heard him. He was too busy freaking out. If Cady was pregnant, it was either the best thing, like, ever or his worst nightmare. He couldn’t wrap his head around it. And why hadn’t she told him? For that matter, why hadn’t Dad told him? He felt sort of betrayed.

“She did not know,” Priya said, as if he could read his mind.

Jupe hated when he did that. It was worse than his dad’s knack. He crawled across his bed to reach for the bedside table. “I’m texting her right now to see if you’re lying.”

“Are you a boy or a man?”

Jupe’s hand stilled on his bedside table. “What?”

“I said, are you a boy or a man? Because if you’re a man, you will understand that our mistress is in grave danger, and you must protect her at any cost. But if you are only a boy, I will seek someone else who cares more for her life and will take steps to keep it safe.”

Oh, hell, no. Bird boy was insulting him? Heat rose in Jupe’s chest. “I’m more of a man that you’ll ever be.”

“Prove it.”

“You wanna fight? I’ll pound your feathered ass into the floorboards.” The guardian wasn’t much taller than him, and Dad said that nine times out of ten, people who wanted to pick fights were all talk. Dad had also been showing him where to punch someone in the face, because the antibullying campaign at school was a load of shit. Okay, not all of it, but the tattletale part. Mrs. Henry said to run away and tell a teacher if someone was acting like an ass; Dad said that advice was for savages—humans who didn’t believe Earthbounds existed—and that Jupe should learn to hit back if someone hit him.

Hit first, then tell a teacher. Basically. At least, that was how Jupe interpreted it.

“I am not challenging you to fight me,” Priya said. “I am challenging you to fight for your mistress. She is confused and not caring for her own safety. If your father will not heed my warnings, then you must take up the charge. It is your responsibility to protect her.”

Jupe started to argue that, actually, Cady had promised to protect Jupe, not the other way around. But he realized it made him sound kind of pathetic, so he kept that to himself. “What are you suggesting?”

“If she will not heed my warning to find the Moonchild spell, then you must find it for her. If you are a man, you are honor-bound to do so.” Priya held his chin high. “I once gave up my life to protect her. Are you willing to do the same, or are you going to cower like a small child and allow her to be killed?”

“How am I supposed to find a spell no one else has been able to find?”

“You possess the voice of persuasion, do you not?”

“My knack?”

“Use it to interrogate members of her occult order. Trace her history, and find the spell.”

“But her order is in Florida. That’s a long way away. There’s no way in hell Dad will let me go alone.”

“Then do not tell him. Be your own man.” Priya’s gray skin crackled with energy; he was fading. “Summon me if you need help. I will assist you however I can.”

And with that, the creature disappeared.

“Goddammit!” Jupe shouted, hurling an empty video-game case at the place where Priya once stood. It hit a shoe on top of a stack of books, which all fell off his dresser with a loud thump.

He immediately heard a muffled call from the guest room.

“Sorry,” he called back to Mrs. Holiday. “It was an accident. Everything’s fine.”

After hearing whining and scratching outside his door, he pushed himself off the bed and let Foxglove inside. The Lab sniffed around the area where Priya had materialized. Good thing she wasn’t there for the visit, or she would have barked her face off, because Foxglove didn’t like Priya any more than Jupe did. Smart dog. He gave her a quick scratch behind her ears and watched her trot over to the hedgehog crate to inspect Mr. Piggy’s well-being—who, unlike Foxglove, couldn’t care less about anything but snacking on fruit and projectile pooping.

Had to admire that kind of simple life.

So Cady was pregnant. He blew out a long breath. Before everything happened—before Mr. Dare, the biggest asshole in the world, may he rot forever and ever, put Cady in the hospital—Dad sat down with Jupe and told him all his plans. About buying Cady an engagement ring. Asking her to marry him. Everything was so much better then. Cady would say yes to Dad’s proposal, of course—why wouldn’t she?—and they’d all be a real family.