All for This Page 16


“What if you ask me to?”

She swallows. “I won’t ask.”

7

THE WIND is cool as it rolls off the river and through the changing leaves. Autumn in New Hope has to be one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. The leaves turn orange, red, brown, even purple¸ fall from the trees, and float by on the river. I’ll always associate the sound of leaves crunching underfoot with my childhood, with home.

But today, it doesn’t bring me the comfort I need. My conversation with Nate demands too much of my attention for anything to comfort me.

“Between when I left LA and when I came back to New Hope, what happened to make you take him back?”

You died. They were the words I didn’t say, but they’ve been there, in my mind and on my tongue, since he asked the question. Are they true? Did I only go back to Max because I thought Nate was dead?

“How are you holding up?”

I look up to see Maggie pulling a chair up to the patio set behind William’s art gallery. She asked me to meet her here, and something about my carefree sister scheduling a conversation has left butterflies in my stomach.

“I’m okay,” I answer. “Emotional, but I blame the hormones.”

“Yeah,” she says, “not the fact that you’re in love with two men, wearing one’s ring, and carrying the other’s babies?”

“Well, that sums it up rather nicely.” I’ve been trying to convince myself that nothing between Max and me has changed, but I don’t invite him to stay over anymore, and every time he kisses me, I feel ashamed and confused.

“Sorry.” She shrugs. “I know something about loving two men at once. Listen,” she says after studying me for a minute. “Before you dig your heels in about staying with Max, I want you to think about it.”

I stiffen. I know Maggie loves me and has my best interests at heart, but after today, when I can still feel Nate’s lips press against mine, when his scent lingers on my skin, this is the last thing I need.

“I have thought about it, and I made my decision—weeks ago, before the accident. I put on his ring.”

“I’m saying don’t blindly trust a decision you can’t remember making. Ask yourself if you would choose Max again today—at this very moment—if you had to make your decision again.”

“I don’t know.” If I’d known that my night with Nate left me pregnant, who knows what my choice would have been? “No matter what I do, someone gets hurt.”

“Stop trying to figure out why you made the choice then and start trying to figure out what choice is right for you now. You’re trying to protect Max, and as much as he wants to marry you, I don’t think that’s where he would want your decision to come from.”

“I don’t want to hurt him,” I whisper. “He’s too good. He doesn’t deserve to be hurt.”

“I know, sweetie.”

I watch a young couple jog by along the river. “How did you know? When you decided to be with Asher, to move in with him, how did you know it was the right decision?”

“Hanna.” She waits until I look at her. “I knew because I didn’t have to ask myself if I was making the right decision. When I was engaged to Will, I kept asking myself over and over again if I was doing the right thing. I would mentally tally all the reasons I should marry him and feel guilty for questioning it, and then the next day, the next hour, sometimes even the next minute, I’d do it all over again. But that should have been my first hint.” She smiles then takes my hands in hers. “I know you’re a grown woman and you have your head on your shoulders better than I probably ever will, so it seems ridiculous for me to give you advice, but I’m going to anyway. Give Max his ring back.”

“Maggie—”

“Hear me out. Please?”

“Okay.” But my stomach twists into a painful knot because I’m scared that I won’t want to hear what she has to say.

“Maybe you’re meant to be with Max. Maybe you two will work this out and you’ll have these babies and find that all you want is to spend your life with Max at your side. Maybe there will come a day that he’ll tell you all he needs is you and you’ll be as sure as I am with Asher.” She cocks her head and gives me a sad smile. “But, sweetie, it’s all over your face that you’re not there now. I’m not saying this because I’m Nate’s friend and trying to give him a foot-up. I’m saying this because you’re my sister and I love you, and I refuse to see you make the mistake that Krystal and I almost made. You owe it to yourself and to Max to give back that ring until you know for sure what you want.”

A tear splashes onto the glass tabletop, and I stand up and walk down the stairs to the lawn. Maggie’s not telling me anything I don’t already know. But I’ve been putting off the inevitable.

Maggie wraps an arm around me. I lean my head against her shoulder as she smooths my hair and we watch the wind play in the leaves and the blue evening sky turn to the pink and orange of the setting sun.

It’s been ten hours since the kiss, but when I open the door to meet Max at his new rental house, I can still feel the pressure of Nate’s lips against mine. I can still smell his clean scent as if it’s been branded to my clothing.

The house is nice. Nothing fancy, but it’s clean and functional. The table is set, the candles are lit, and the wine is chilling in a bucket of ice on the island.

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