The sensation stopped with such abruptness, I fell to my hands and knees as tremors ran rampant through my body. I gasped for breath.

Once I regained my composure I sat on the floor and looked at Kade. The orb rested in his lap with his head bowed over it.

He didn’t move. “I can’t. She’s all I have left.”

“What about Raiden and the other Stormdancers?”

No answer.

“Friends?”

“Not the same. We had a special bond. You wouldn’t understand.”

Frustration boiled. “You’re as thick as a fog bank. I do understand. Tula wasn’t my twin, but we did everything together, shared everything. I fought her demons with her after she had been attacked by Ferde. And I was so mad at her for dying when I needed her the most. Two weeks I suffered for her and she didn’t wait for me. I returned and there was no one I could talk to, confide in, cry with.” The words flew from my mouth. Unexpected. Unintentional. But there all the same.

Kade stared at me as if I had grown antennae. And perhaps I had. I felt like a different person.

“Then you understand why I don’t want to get close to another again. What happens when she dies, too? I couldn’t bear it.”

“Then you miss out on life.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ll be alone, trusting no one because of fear. I know. I have four years of experience of pushing people away, missing out on life. Four years spent by myself, living in my glass cage. Four years of self-doubt, worries, fears.”

“And now?” he asked. His voice rough with emotion.

“I still have my fears, doubts and worries, but I also have Mara, Leif, Zitora and Ulrick.”

“The watchdog?”

“No. A person to confide in and share with. A person willing to take a risk and be with me despite my track record.”

“And if he dies?”

“I’ll have Mara, Leif and Zitora.”

“So the more people you invite in, the easier it is to lose one?”

“No. I’ll still feel as if my heart is being torn into strips, but I’ll have support and love to hold the fragments together until they heal.”

“Then you’re braver than I am.” Kade stood. He dropped the orb into my lap. “Keep it safe. Please.”

I stared at the swirling colors on the surface of the orb. Muted, sad colors. No song. The door clicked shut. Kade was gone.

Routine. Routine felt safe and warm. Routine was waking in the morning next to Ulrick and spending a day in the glass shop with my sister. Routine was riding Quartz through figure eights and jumping her over fences. Routine was discussing politics with Zitora and making plans for the midseason festival. Routine was weapons training and letting Pazia take her frustrations out on me.

Just when I settled into a routine, Ulrick informed me about another mission.

“Illegal diamonds were discovered hidden in a merchant’s wagon. He was stopped and searched after he crossed the border from Ixia,” he said.

We were in the Keep’s dining hall, decorating for the midseason dance. Each of the glass helpers had made a centerpiece for the tables. Pazia’s was the best, but I would never say so out loud. Ulrick refused to make one, but he seemed content to assist the others.

“Zitora wants us to go to Mica, where you can test the diamonds to see if they’re the same as Mr. Lune’s.” Ulrick positioned a vase with a sunflower made of pale yellow glass.

“Now?” I had been anticipating the dance for the last week. Leif had even returned from the Moon lands just to attend.

Ulrick’s expression was hard to read. He acted as if the trip was bad news. “We’ll leave tomorrow morning. Tonight is for dancing and fun only. No business talk. Promise?”

“That’s an easy promise to make.”

It was an easy promise to keep. Everyone dressed in their finest clothes. I wore a simple and elegant gown made with purple silk. Fisk had found the material on sale, and introduced me to a little-known dressmaker who had designed the formfitting gown for me.

Ulrick’s openmouthed gape said it all.

The dining hall had been transformed into a ballroom. The music enticed us onto the dance floor. The divine smell of roasting meat and sweet pastries pulled us to the buffet table. Mara and Leif looked splendid together. Ulrick charmed. Conversation remained on light and frothy topics. A perfect evening.

I wrapped the memories of the evening around myself as I lugged my saddlebags through the cold air and to the stable the next morning. Humming a tune from the dance, I saddled Quartz and helped Ulrick with Moonlight.

The trip to Mica would take three days. We traveled on main roads and stayed overnight at inns. Late on the second night, I woke feeling uneasy. I stared into the darkness and listened for a moment. Nothing. A wedge of light reflected off the window and I slid out of bed to investigate the source. It emanated from my saddlebags beneath the flap.

Apprehension churned as I moved the flap. Kaya’s orb glowed. I brushed the orb with my fingertips. An intense wave of energy shot through my hand. My sight blurred as Kaya’s voice filled my head.

Kade’s in trouble, she said with urgency.

A vision of Sir, Tal and Tricky wrestling with the Stormdancer formed in my mind. Snow-laced wind swirled around the fighters. They wore heavy cloaks. I watched him, powerless to help. Debris flew around the men and for a moment it appeared as if Kade had the upper hand.

Tricky reached behind a wagon and threw a net over Kade. The scene disappeared in an instant.