Shadows in the Silence Page 65


Ava studied my face. “That isn’t everything, though. Is it?”

She was obnoxiously intuitive. “I asked Michael if there was a way for me to become Gabriel and to have my full power. He said that if I became an archangel, that tapping into my full strength would annihilate my mortal body. He was also unsure that I would come back if I died as Gabriel. Meaning, that would be it for me.”

“Ah,” she murmured, the sympathy in her indigo eyes warm. “And now Will is determined to keep you from ascending.”

I forced a smile. “Right on the money.”

“Well, the answer is to do what you believe you have to do,” she said, “but that’s pretty hard to accomplish around someone as strong-minded and determined as Will. He doesn’t want you to die, that’s all it is. And for what it’s worth, I don’t want you to die either.”

“Thanks,” I said with a little laugh. “You and me both. I hope there’s a way to beat Sammael and Lilith without killing me too, but if there isn’t, then I know what I have to do.”

“I believe you can do anything,” Ava said.

I fell silent, marveling at how far we’d come, she and I. “Thank you.”

With a nod of her head, she motioned to the hallway Will had disappeared down. “Go talk to him.”

It wasn’t hard to find Will. When he needed to think and cool off, he usually went outside. He seemed to prefer the outdoors anyway. He sat on the swing bench out by the lake shore and watched me as I slid into the seat next to him.

“I’m sorry I brought it up,” I said to him.

He shook his head. “Don’t be. I shouldn’t have let it upset me. The others needed to know everything we’re considering. I’m just unwilling to consider this plan.”

I didn’t want to start the argument all over again and I got the feeling that he didn’t want to either. I pulled my legs onto the bench and curled up against him, resting my head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around me. “We’re going to be okay,” I promised him. “We’ll hop on yet another plane, find the Pentalpha, get Azrael to be our terminator, get him a leather jacket and sunglasses, and we’ll be fine.”

He said nothing and only held me tighter.

I said my good-byes to Nana later that day before heading over to Kate’s to watch movies and relax. She opened the door and gave me a big hug. It felt so good to see her after the emotional roller-coaster that was the Arizona trip.

“When did Marcus leave?” I asked as we headed up to her room.

“I actually got back from his place about an hour ago,” she replied. “Figured I might as well help him pack…and stuff.”

“Tactful,” I said, rolling my eyes.

She closed the door behind us and plopped down on her bed. “I made him promise to bring you home.”

“We’ll both work very hard at that,” I said. I dragged her movie binder out from the cabinets under her television. “What do you feel like watching first?”

“Something awesome and fun.”

I flipped through the pages, scanning the titles. “How about Clueless?”

“Perfect.”

“Then Mean Girls?”

Kate let out a long, happy sigh. “How are you reading my mind right now?”

“Natural skills, obviously,” I said, and popped the disc in the player.

Spending a few hours with my best friend, watching movies and joking around, helped me grasp that feeling of normalcy I hadn’t sensed in so long. I had worried that this final night of peace would make it harder for me to let go of my life, but sitting there with Kate, tears in my eyes from laughing, and our senior yearbook wide open between us, I decided that I wouldn’t give up without a hell of a fight—that I’d be unbreakable. I wasn’t just fighting for my own life, I was fighting for Kate’s too. For everyone’s lives. I couldn’t let them down.

She must have noticed my distant look, because she rested her head on my shoulder. “You okay, Ell?”

I gave a halfhearted shrug. “I just want this to be over.”

“Marcus told me he was worried about you.”

I made a mental note to kick him in the kneecap for getting me into this conversation with Kate. “I’ll be okay. I promise.”

She made an unintelligible noise of disbelief. “He also said that you and Will were acting weird, and that I shouldn’t say anything. Which of course means I will. And I just did. So, explain, please.”

A secret smile escaped my control. This was a conversation I wasn’t afraid of having. “Something happened. Things changed.”

“Something good by that stupid grin on your face.” She laughed and then her eyes got huge. “Oh my God! You slept with him!”

I chewed on my lip. “Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you tell me right away?” she asked, sounding hurt.

“Things have been pretty crazy.”

“I understand,” she said. “So, spill. How was it?” She winked at me.

“He was very sweet,” I replied. “He was good to me.”

She smiled. “I’m happy for you. I’m glad that things have worked themselves out for you two. Your relationship has been so up and down for a long time.”

“It’s been hard,” I agreed. “I’m sad that we waited so long to be together. It’s probably too late now.”

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